Favorite lines from lesser known films

I was watching “Out of the past” with Robert Mitchum and Kirk Douglas (I just bought it and highly recommend it) when I realized how many great lines there were in the movie, such as:

“You’re like a leaf that the wind blows from one gutter to another.”

Kathy, who Douglas is paying Mitchum to find is explaining to Mitchum’s character that she really didn’t take anything from Kirk Douglas and says “You do believe me don’t you?” Mitchum grabs her to kiss her and says “Baby, I don’t care.”

Referring to Kathy another character says, “She can’t be all bad, no one is” and Mitchum responds “Well, she comes the closest.”

Douglas: “You wait for me to talk, I like that.”
Mitchum: I never found out much listening to myself."

We all know how many great lines there are in “The Maltese Falcon” and “Casablanca” does anyone have any other examples from lesser known films?

Woody Allen’s first feature film, What’s Up Tiger Lily?, was a Japanese spy film redubbed with humorous dialogue. There are a lot of great bits (Pointing to a map: “This is the master’s house.” “What, he lives on a piece of paper?”), but one of my favorites is a Peter Pan parody involving the main character and a gun:

Hero: “No bullets? Well, if all of the people in the audience who believe in fairies clap their hands, my gun will be magically filled with bullets.”
Villian: “I don’t believe in fairies.”
Other Villain: “Then don’t clap, you idiot!”

There are also a number of interludes featuring Woody Allen as the director of the film, one of the funniest of which appears, IIRC, after a very complicated sequence:

Interviewer: “For the benefit of the audience, would you care to tell us what’s going on at this point in the movie?”
Woody Allen: “No.”

“Well I’ll tell you one thang, I sure as hell wouldn’ta quit smoking if I’da known Sister was gonna die.”

“They had to reinforce that barstool with LUHG NUHTS!”

“Shoot 'er, Wardell! Shoot 'er in the head!”

All from Sordid Lives

Bwah! I knew just from the dialogue that you were quoting a Del Shores screenplay. I have a cousin who was in one of his movies (otherwise I might’ve missed it), but for a “minor” writer he shore does have a recognizable voice.

“Anyone can say he’s a writer. But when someone else say’s you’re a writer then you’re a writer.” – Hearts of the West

“Jumping butterballs” – Room Service

“))<>(( forever.” – You and Me and Everyone We Know

“I close the iron door.” – 20th Century

“You ain’t got enough ass in yer britches to pull the trigger on Barbarosa!” Willie Nelson in Barbarosa.

From What’s Up, Doc?, and said by Barbra Striesand to Ryan O’Neil after she’s put him through all forms of complete and utter hell.

“Love means nevering having to say you’re sorry.”
“That’s the stupidist thing I’ve ever heard.”

Should I ever get really sick and decide that laughter really is the best medicine, I’m going to watch What’s Up, Doc? on a regular basis.

The best part of the movie, in my opinion. (Second best- seeing a young Lucille Ball as a secretary.) It wasn’t written for the Marxes, and it shows.

Reminds me of Willie in Electric Horseman: “I’m gonna find me one of them keno girls that can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch and kick back.”

Also Redford: “I was giving mouth to mouth resuscitation to a bottle of tequila. We lost her.”

Ace In the Hole, AKA The Big Carnival.
The editor Chuck Tatum (Kirk Douglas) wants to hire him asks, “Do you drink a lot?”
Tatum: “I don’t drink a lot, I drink frequently.”

Oh, and from True Grit. One of my favorite lines is just before the horseback gunfight. Rooster Cogburn (John Wayne) calls upon the bad guys to surrender. Ned Pepper is played by Robert Duvall:

“I call that bold talk for a one-eyed fat man.”
Cogburn cocks the winchester one handed, takes the Navy colt in the other, and just before he takes the reins in his teeth and charges yells, “Fill you hand, you son of a bitch!”

It really isn’t a lesser known movie, but this line from 48 Hours is a catch-all in our household:

Eddie Murphy’s character complains to Nick Nolte’s character that he needs a decent meal. Nolte agrees and takes Murphy to the ancient candy machine in bowels of the police station, pulls the ancient lever, the machine deposits an ancient Clark Bar or Zagnut or some such thing. Nolte cheerefully growls, “There’s your goddamn dinner!

Somehow, that line became a talisman–as in, “There’s your goddamn laundry!” or “There’s your goddamn oil change,” or “There’s your goddamn new bottle of shampoo.” Always delivered in the Nolte growl, of course.

Occasionally, I have been known to put a plates in front of my family and summon the original “There’s your goddamn dinner!”

I often hear myself using variations of Charlie Sheen’s line, “I never wanted to be a horse so much in my life” from Hot Shots!

The very obscure 1980s horror film Las Vegas Bloodbath features a unique little dialogue. A guy comes home to find his wife in bed with another man. He says, “I can’t believe it. You’re cheating on me in the middle of the day. You whore! You day whore!”

It only gets better from there.

“The Stuntman”

Sam the Scriptwriter: “I had a virgin once. Had to go to Guatamala for it. SHe was blind in one eye and had a stuffed alligator that said ‘Welcome to Miami Beach’”

George Kennedy as Joe Patroni in The Concorde: Airport '79:

“They don’t call it the cockpit for nothing, honey.” (original emphasis)

<shudder>

Withnail & I (1987) spurts brilliant comedic lines so quickly it’s difficult to keep track of them.

I feel like a pig shat in my head.

We want the finest wines available to humanity. And we want them here, and we want them now!

[approaching the pub] Right, here’s the plan. First, we go in there and get wrecked, then we eat a pork pie, then we drop some Surmontil-50’s each. That way we’ll miss out on Monday and come up smiling Tuesday morning.

Marwood: If my father was loaded I’d ask him for some money.
Withnail: If your father was my father you wouldn’t get it.

This place has become impossible. Nothing to eat, freezing cold and now a madman on the prowl outside with eels.

I must say, that represents a level of hypocrisy in you that I’d previously suspected, but not noticed due to highly evasive skills.

It’s been way too long for me to be able to give accurate quotes, but the Brando-directed One Eyed Jacks had dozens of quotable lines in it. I hope somebody else can flesh out the actual lines, but I’ll paraphrase at least.

Guy #1: That fella that just walked in is Rio.
Guy#2: That ain’t Rio.
Guy #1: Well I wouldn’t want to gamble me a handful of brains over it.

Girl: Rio, you don’t have any reason to kill Dad.
Rio: Reason? Reasons? I got 17 hundred and eight. That’s how many days I spent rotting my guts out in that pen down in Sonora. Don’t talk to me about reasons.

Rio (to Lon): Git up you big tubba guts.

Rio (to one of his gang): Git up, you scum-sucking pig. You mention her name one more time and I’m gonna tear your arms out.

I feel the need to rent that from Netflix now. :slight_smile:

From D.C. Cab:

I always used that one in job interviews.

For a flop of a movie D.C. Cab actually had several good lines. Some others:

Tyrone: Where to?
Angel of Death: I am the Angel of Death. Take me to hell.
Tyrone: Got any luggage?

Dell: Bruce Lee ain’t dead you know. They got him frozen in carbonite down under Chatsworth. They’re gonna melt him down as soon as the economy gets better.

FBI Chief: Did Albert ever discuss his political convictions with you?
Dell: Albert don’t have no political convictions. He’s an American!

And many more.

Jeez, how did I miss that one?