Floyd R Turbo, American
“I’m Chris Hansen from Dateline NBC…”
From Good Times: “Negro, please.”
“If you really wanna know, the chinks just sneeze and say nothing. They can’t speak English.”
“Play it cool. son, know what I mean? Play it cool”
Oh, and
“I’m playing all the right notes, not necessarily in the right order”.
Three from MAS*H:
General (pointing to his insignia): What do you think this star means?
Hawkeye: You’re Tinkerbell?
Different General (pointing to his insignia): What does this mean to you?
Hawkeye: Always trust your car to the man who wears a star.
Hawkeye: (seeing Frank, wrapped in gauze, enter the mess tent) The mummy strikes!
“…why don’t you have a seat over there.”
“Denny Crane…!”
and of course
“It’s my sister Violet. You remember Violet - Mercedes, sauna, room for a pony?”
“I’m sitting here, completely surrounded by no beer!”
“I’m off men. That’s it. Finished. There isn’t one worth shaving your legs for!”
Lois Lane: Why can’t Professor Periwinkle stick to more practical things, like making a better
mousetrap?"
Clark Kent: Knowing the professor, he’d try to make a better mouse".
“Ward, weren’t you being a little hard on the Beaver?”
“Who says I’m dumb?”
“Make it so”
“Them Dukes, them Dukes!”
“Danger, Will Robinson!”
“GILLIGAN!”
“Have…um…have you…um…ever considered…um…wearing sweaters?”
My favorites:
Moops!
Well I got a flash for ya, joy boy.
Nanoo, Nanoo!
Book 'em, Dano.
D’oh!
Alright there, Ralphy boy!
George is getting angry!
Lupus? Is it Lupus?!
Jumbalya!
You… are a meathead.
Hey Hey Hey!
“What is a week …end?”
Lots of good ones!
How about: “Mulder, it’s me.”
“I have a cunning plan.”
“I’m free!”
“They don’t like it up 'em, Mr Mainwaring.”
“It’s goodnight from me.”
“And it’s goodnight from him.”
My special favourite Hancock line: “I thought my mother was a bad cook, but at least her gravy used to move about.”
I suspect Victoria Wood wouldn’t work as well for Americans, but there are legions of lines from her work:
“We’ve had hens in the skirting boards”
“When our Jean was eight, she looked like a dinghy with plaits”
“Excuse me, grey eggs? Is that an Arab custom?”
“Cold ice?”
“Arseholes on toast”
“As I said to Gerard Depardieu, what’s the point of having a great big hooter if you can’t shove a banana up it?”
A man may fight for many things - his country; his principles; his friends; the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child - but, personally, I’d mud-wrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock, and a sack of French porn.
Meg on Family Guy:
“I can’t taste salt!”
Let me tell you all my favorite single line, by naming 20 different lines in multiple posts.
I don’t recall this one. Who said it on what show?
If you have a problem, try to resolve it yourself, but if you find yourselves at loggerheads, don’t take the law into your own hands; you take 'em to court – People’s Court
.