“BANG, ZOOM!”
“HAR-HAR, HAAAAAAAARDEE-HAR-HAR!”
“TO THE MOON, Alice, TO THE MOON!”
“Oh, you’re a RIOT, Alice!”
“You get any bigger, Gasbag, and you’ll float away!”
“Oh, give me an ultomato, eh?!”
“You are entering the vicinity of an area adjacent to a location. The kind of place where there might be a monster or some kind of weird mirror. These are just examples; it could also be something much better. Prepare to enter The Scary Door.”
Get out of my chair, meathead.
I know where this one is from but I never understood why it was supposed to be funny. Could someone please explain the humour to me? Is it just because “Hymie” is an unusual name for a robot? (If so, that seems like a pretty weak joke.)
Hee-Haw
Hey Grandpa, what’s for supper?
The number to call is BR-549.
Sanford and Son
“I’m coming to join you Elizabeth”.
“You ole fished-eyed fool”.
Beverly Hillbillies
“I’m gonna have to have a serious talk with that boy some day.”
WHO says I’m dumb?
From the Drew Carey Show: “Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called ‘Everybody’ and they meet at the bar!”
All right, where does this one come from? It’s so, so familiar…
"This is mine, this is mine… ALL this is mine…
I’m gonna go make a few more things MINE."
Line ball between …
[a] ‘Oh the pain! The pain! The pain of it all’
or
** ‘Never fear, Smith is here!’
This reminded me of one from NewsRadio: “If this was Logan’s Run we’d all be soylent green by now!”
Josiah Bartlet: No. No “however”. Just be wrong. Just stand there in your wrongness and be wrong and get used to it.
Oh, and two from Futurama:
Zoidberg: “Your music’s bad and you should feel bad!”
&
Prof. Farnsworth:" Oooh… A lesson in not changing history from Mr. I’m-my-own-grandpa! Let’s get the hell out of here already."
And from Frasier, the episode with the cricket:
“It Taunts Me!”
“I could stick your face in some dough, and make some gorilla cookies.”
My favorite, as with many, I see, in this thread, is from M.A.S.H.. If you’re looking for a single line, it’s Col. Henry Blake’s at the end of this exchange, but you need the whole thing for context:
Col. Henry Blake: Time Zones! Time Zones! Why do we even have time zones?
Radar O’Reilly: Because the world is round and keeps rotating, sir.
Blake: (silent momentarily, taken aback) Oh. I thought it was some kind of Army thing.
Don’t tell him your name, Pike!
This was my first choice.
But since it was mentioned, I was going to post this one.
Then this was my third choice.
In other words, I got nothin’ that hasn’t already been submitted.
“Please, don’t make me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry…”
“Sploosh!”
“I have a message. Lt. Colonel Henry Blake’s plane…was shot down over the Sea of Japan. It spun in…there were no survivors…”
“Please pass the butter!”
Amy Farrah Fowler after an hilarious exchange where she pretends to be interested in Sheldon’s video system dilemma.
And from the Mary Tyler Moore Show, the entire show had a punchline, and it was “He’s gay!” It may be the first time gay=homosexual on TV, and the use was non-pejorative. Here’s the background, spoilered: Phyllis, notorious for disliking Rhoda has a brother named Ben who is visiting her, and she keeps trying to set him up with Mary. It never “clicks,” but he really hits it off with Rhoda, and they are doing something together almost every evening. Phyllis confronts Rhoda, who says don’t worry, she isn’t interested in Ben. Then Phyllis gets offended and says “Why not?” She recites all his qualities: his superior education, his good income, his talent, “He’s this, he’s that–” Rhoda interrupts with “He’s gay.” After the audience laughter finally dies down a little, Phyllis says [here’s the payoff] “Oh thanks gawd!”