Seriously, when the going gets tough, you don’t want a criminal lawyer. Alright, you want a* criminal *lawyer.
The TV show Justified when Art says to Raylan: “You’re like the Hillbilly Whisperer - we should get you on Oprah.”
“You are a sex god, Señor.”
“My…brain…hurts”
“And now for something completely different…”
“If life were fair, there wouldn’t be rich people.”
from All in the Family:
Archie Bunker: “If God had meant for white people to dance with colored people–”
Meathead: “He would have given us rhythm, too.”
Gloria:
[quotes a statistic about gun murders]
Archie: “Would it make you feel better, little girl, if they was pushed out of windows?”
from The Kids in the Hall:
“We’ve been coming to Earth for fifty years, performing anal probes, and all we’ve learned is that one in ten doesn’t really seem to mind.”
“Omar’s Comin’”
Levy: “You are a parasite that leeches off the culture of drugs”
Omar: “Just Like You Man”
Levy: “Excuse me-What?”
Omar: “I got the shotgun. You got the briefcase. It’s all in the game though, right?”
[singing]“I’m gonna get me a shotgun and shoot every honky I see. . .”
“Kiss my grits!”
“Ha! You missed BOTH my legs!”
“Always rude, that one.”
“Oh, me! What is I gonna do?”
“I loves ya, Andy! I loves ya, son!”
“Why is it me? Why is it always me?”
“My God, you’re ugly!”
“You rang?”
“But I’m feeling MUCH better now!”
“Shazbat!”
“Put it in a sock, Clayton!”
“Bite my shiny metal ass!”
“I ain’t gettin’ on no airplane, Hannibal.”
“Murdock, shut up, you fool!”
“Oscar, Oscar, Oscar!”
“Hi, I’m Larry; this is my brother Darryl, and this is my other brother Darryl.”
“Oh, that’s brilliant! We ought to put you on Mastermind! ‘Next contestant, from Torquay, Sybil Fawlty. Subject: The Bleeding Obvious!’”
“It is green.”
We just saved the day, didn’t we?
Yes, sir.
What does that make us?
Big damn heroes, sir.
“Call me Suzy Chapstick!”
“I became a swami 'cause I thought it would be a good way to meet girls!”
“Don’t you just love beautiful feet?”
“The pain … the ITCH … of hemorrhoids!”
“Painful rectal itch!”
“The heartbreak of psoriasis!”
“STRAW-ber-ries! BLUE-ber-ries! CHER-er-er-ER-er-er-ies!”
“That’s it for him then!”
“I was wrong to meddle with the forces of Darkness and I see that now.”
“Awwww, the Denver Broncos.”
“Vyvyan, where’d you get that howitzer”
Though my memory may be faulty.
And, I remember that line as “Dear Darling Fascist Bully Boy”.