Can’t believe we got this far without this:
“I’ll be in my bunk.”
Yep, this is my favorite line from TV, closely followed by “whaaaaaaaaaat… dooooooessss…a… yellllllowwwwwwwwww… liiiiiiiiiiight… mean?”
I thought your favorite line would be, “We should hang out by the quarry and throw things down there.” 
“Oh, Sir Reginald! My nipples explode with delight!”
“Troi! You’re my friend, and you tricked me!” :eek:
So many to choose from! Yikes. So I’ll go with five:
“You’re like Santa Claus… on Prozac… at Disneyland… getting laid!”
“Well, what do you know? I finally got the last word.”
“No soup for you!”
“That’s the short definition of ‘Captain.’”
"I don’t know how many more of your disastrous love stories I can hear. I’ll say “‘when.’”
“Women! Can’t live with 'em… Pass the beer nuts, Woody!”
“Whoops! The cat ate it!”
From Hancock’s Half Hour.
Magna Carta; did she die in vain?
“How’s it going, Norm?” “It’s a dog eat dog world, Sam, and I’m wearing Milk Bone underwear.”
“How’s life treating you, Norm?” “Like it caught me sleeping with its wife.”
“This just in: General Francisco Franco is still dead.”
“Mel Brooks is *Jewish?” *- Homer Simpson
(And as I learned growing up with Mad magazine, anything Jewish is automatically funny.)
“I’m Chevy Chase and you’re not.”
“How’s life treating you, Norm?”
“Like I just ran over its dog.”
“What’s shakin’, Mr Peterson?”
“All four cheeks and a couple of chins.”
“What would you say to a beer, Norm?”
“Hello, beer!”
“This is an ex-parrot!”
Dammit jim, I’m a…
But she was naked and articulate!
“Mind if I join you [in the shower], Marge? [PAUSE] I’ll take your silence for consent!”
“We’ll be killing all the humans when we come!
We’ll be killing all the humans when we come!
We will kill them and we’ll eat them,
'Cause that’s the way to treat them!
We’ll be killing all the humans when we come!”
“I, for one, welcome our new ant overlords!”
FLANDERS [At marriage retreat]: Sometimes Maude, God bless her, underlines passages in my Bible instead of hers!
HOMER [Sotto voce]: Hmpf! Good thing you don’t keep guns in the house!
“The Volvo proved even safer than advertised.”
BUZZ ALDRIN: I’m impressed!*
*From a 1972 VW commercial.