Well, not really. But the idea of having a Jeusus action figure just seems weird.
I keep picturing me as a kid having a war where TRON and CLU team up with G.I. Joe and the Micronauts to fight the forces of C.O.B.R.A. and the evil giant Barbie-woman (swiped from my cousin), and to save the day comes Fightin’ Mad Action-Jesus shows up, and boy is he pissed!
I woulda had Fightin’ Mad Action-Jesus fling loaves and fishes at the evil forces of C.O.B.R.A. And then, when they get into their motorboat to escape, he’ll run across the water as I’d make Bionic-Man sounds (dadadadadadada). When he caught them, he’d use his patented Tear Down The Moneylender’s Stall Grip to tear apart their boat and as the evil forces of C.O.B.R.A. drowned, he’d condem them to hell! Then, they’d all get back into their lightcycles and go back to Tron’s world where they could play on the Game-Grid. Oh, and Amazon Eve: Warrior Princess would kick Barbie’s Primp’n’pretty ass!
Somehow, turning your savior, the Messiah, into an action-figure lacks a certain…dignity.
Also available in the multi-racial ethnic pack. (Outside of the basic weirdness of the entire concept, I’ve got no problem with the multi-racial ethnic pack. Frankly most of the characters look better than they do in the “Pasty-white and funkless” set. It’s just the weirdness of the whole idea)
Fenris
And lookit the website name “Train up a child”?! You train dogs, you raise children. And what is the word “up” doing there? You don’t train something “up”. (I know that it comes from Proverbs, but I’ve always heard it translated as “Raise”)
Oh, the possibilities of the mix and match action figures. Mary and GI Joe (Duke, I suppose) fighting it out against Darth Vader and Boba Fett.
I can just see, though, some fundie parent seeing their kid doing that kind of thing…“Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child, but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.”
Those were just one of the extra-special religious goodies to be found through Ship of Fools’ Gadgets for God pages. If you think a Jesus action figure is weird, try browsing through this collection of theological tat. (Keep something soft under your chin, though, because your jaw will drop at some of them.)
A personal favourite of mine can be found in the “Devotional” section, under “His land is your land”.
"Why bother with one of those action figures that relies purely on mind-numbing but entertaining violence? Now you can have to Lord on your side.
See: Jesus converting the enemies (optional sword to ploughshare transforming accessory not included).
See: The Army of Righteousness™ kick some serious heathen butt, after all, who can defeat an army when the leader can bring soldiers back from the dead.
See: Jesus bitch slap all the Fanatical Fundies™ (sold seperately) while screaming “Stop Misquoting Me!” into their faces.
I think these would make a great gift when combined with the Sport Jesus statues (my favorite: “Taunting the short kids”).
Well, a Jesus action figure is better than a Baby Jesus Butt plug (and no, I’m not going to link to it, but it is one of the funniest things I’ve even seen ).
Well in these days and times there’s not much sacred left anyway. It doesn’t surprise me to see these kinds of things offered up for sale, especially to kids. Not really much to say about it, if you say you don’t approve of it then you get the boot in the behind because you ‘need to lighten’ up some. After all it’s just all in fun. But ya know, still makes my heart aches a little that there’s just not something in the world that we don’t make fun of and have a little respect for, whether or not it’s something we personally believe in or not.
<groan> Listen, is creating “action figures” representing sacred figures of the Christian faith for children to play with in any way dignified or noble? These products are embarassing in the extreme and are subject to any and all expressions of irony and disgust. Now, if you want a really dignified, cool and respectable Jesus you need to go to http://www.viewaskew.com and check out the “Buddy Jesus”! I have him on my bedside table with a picture of a stained glass window behind him and he’s holding an orange paper parasol from one of those fancy drinks. I’m not even christian but he gives me a warm fuzzy whenever I see him! (Thanks to Olentzero the Swedish Love God!)
Well, hey, at the Jesus Christ Superstore one can get this figure (“the father, the son, and the bad motherf…”), which includes Ninja-Messiah throwing nails and a Death Killer-Cross pump action over-under shotgun. One can also get God Almighty, The Pope, The Chief Rabbi, Buddha, The Dalai Lama, Allah, The Ayatollah, and Islamic Jihad.
).