Who wanted a girl named Millie.
He thought she was hot,
But when he took his shot,
She told him to go screw a filly.
I’ve heard that three words end in gry…
Niin ohut että sydämesi
Mene vuorille
Mene kauas merelle
Hyväilen sinua, mene, mene.
Oops. Never mind. I misread the thread title.
There’s a rule: no writing in Quenya except in LOTR threads 
There’s a rule: no writing in Quenya
Because you never know when ya
Will need someone’s aid
To know what saoirse said.
Elvish: as foreign as Kenya. <-- yeah, that’s pretty lame
A nerd who loved Tolkein once said…
A nerd who loved Tolkein once said,
“I’d like horns to come out of my head”
I’d rule Middle earth, and show them my worth,
and get a REAL LIVE girl in my bed.
There was a Pirate I knew name of Roger…
Who was a boring old arse of a codger
Though a peg leg he was
I didn’t listen because
to me just another coffin dodger
Two guys named Jack and Bob…
had a fondness for each other’s knob
they tried all kinds of things
dildoes, butt-plugs, and swings
and even a dried up corn cob :eek:
A wizened old Rabbi from Brooklyn…
Bought hookers and started with ticklin’,
They’d laugh and he’d come,
And pay a large sum,
Then fry up a large batch of chitlins.
Oh right, a new starter line. First I have to share this quote, because I can’t resist.
“There was a young lady from Venus, whose body was shaped like a-”
“Data!”
[sub]Ahem, moving on…[/sub]
There once was a lonley programmer…
Who grew bored and became a spammer
Pushing perscription pills
For all sorts of thrills
until his fingers were broken with a hammer.
How about Straight Dope cliches…
There once was a butcher named Hutton…
How about Straight Dope cliches
Think of liberals, dweebs and “the gays”
There’s a general theme
A non-ignorance meme
That’s enforced on the seldomest days
There once was a butcher named Hutton
Who was asked to cut up some mutton
His day could have been nicer –
He got caught by the slicer
Not only his hands, but his butt in!
Kate and Amy took off their tops…
Who made himself a wife out of mutton
When caught getting down
He turned with a frown
And said “C’mon, I aint’ doing nuttin.”
Kate and Amy took off their tops…
There once was a butcher named Hutton,
whose wife was a glutton for mutton.
He snuck up beside 'er,
threw 'er into the grinder…
…NO MUTTON NO GLUTTON NO NUTHIN’!
Kate and Amy took off their tops
When busted by radar-armed cops.
They were doin’ ‘bout eighty,
So they flirted R-ratey…
But the cops knew well the girls’ pops!
There once was a die-hard “Die Hard” fan,
there once was a twin name of Juan
looked just like brother Amal
The pictures were taken
only of Juan, if-I am not mistaken,
cus if you seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal
FML
Next line
Two photons set out one night
There was once a die-hard “Die Hard” fan.
Shocked by the latest die-hard plan
a PG-13 rating?
it sounds too sedating
Where’s the YIPPEKIYAYMOTHERFUCKER, man?
ETA: Two photons set out one night
Photons? This is the lowest I could go when given photons…
Two photons set out one night
Chasing women, at the speed of light
we’ll never get ass
we don’t have any mass
only molecules can we excite.
New line:
Old Brutus, he worked on the dock…