With reference to this thread and this one, in which it is asserted and bandied about that the typical single straight maie either would or would not toddle off into bed with the average woman who asks him point-blank to do so…
Let’s go at this a different way…
IF, hypothetically speaking, it was your intention to engage in ecstasies of the flesh with a hitherto-unknown but mostly “Average” male person you see in a bar, and (for unspecified reasons) this evening is your only opportunity to do so, how would you go about it, assuming that “most likely success” is a very high consideration here?
if you care to post as well as check a poll answer, how would you estimate your likelihood of success?
Hmm… why do I want to have sex, and why do I want to have sex with him (especially if he’s ‘average’)? If I want to have sex because it’s my last chance ever or something or I’m going to die if I don’t, then I’ll strike up a conversation and drop some un-subtle hints, maybe make him think sex was his idea. But there’s also a good chance actually talking to him might turn me right off the idea of screwing him. But I guess if I’m going to die otherwise I’ll have to buck up and do it anyway.
If I’m just really, really horny I might ask a guy to fool around (not screw). I have, and they seemed flummoxed but cool with it. One I’d just been scoping out from across the room, the other I’d been flirting with all night.
And it probably won’t be an ‘average’ guy. As in the other thread, I don’t even know what that really means. Kevin James? I’d rather make out with a girl (which is what quite a few supposedly straight women do to get their jollies in a relatively pressure-free way).
I can’t answer this question because I’m finding it very difficult to even imagine this hypothetical situation, where I’d be attracted to the “average” guy enough to want to sleep with him that night.
I suppose flirting with him while having a few strong drinks and then making out with him later would probably get me what I want eventually, provided he’s the average single straight man. (What does average even mean?)
Yeah, the ‘average’ thing is confusing. I think this illuminates a key difference between men and women. Simply put, we have higher standards for sexual partners, even one-night stands. A man doesn’t need his once-off lovah to be particualry enticing-just so long as she’s not an utter horror.
I have picked up men for the specific purpose of sleeping with them a few times, and it was ridiculously, shockingly easy (and I’m not some ultra-babe). Generally if you walk into a nightclub alone, pick a target, and cock an eyebrow, it’s on.
I think the “average” thing is superfluous to this thread. The reason that the original thread contained the word “average” was specifically to address the assertion that the “average” woman can get laid any time she wants to by just asking any random dude to fuck her.
I’ve had success with options 1, 2, 3, 5, and 6. None of them were average though.
Hmm, fascinating! I actually hadn’t thought of it that way.
Of course, you folks are probably well above average yourselves, (hey, I’ve seen Arnold’s photos board), but would you consider this to be an expected attitude among average women? And, if so, is it a case of “If I have to take the initiative, it’s going to be to get a guy who is hotter than the typical fellow; more ordinary guys would have to start things up themselves”, or “Tastes differ; the target would have to be finer than ordinary to me but the guys that are don’t necessarily look to be the cutest ones to the next chick”, or “No, actually, nearly all women go after the minority of really nice male specimens and none of us would try to snag the guys from ‘average’ on down” ?
That last sounds awfully whiny doesn’t it? But it doesn’t seem to be a pattern in evidence.
Is it an “aspire to” versus “settle for” sort of thing? (Guys do it too; to hear some talk, only the top 10% of stunningly attractive women would be worthy of them)
For me personally, anyone I would consider sleeping with, I would approach. I’m okay with him beating me to it, but if we’ve made eye contact and it’s 15 minutes to closing and I haven’t approached, that means I’m not interested.
Speaking as a female, it is astonishingly easy to get a man to have sex with you.
The “average” male person thing is not applicable, at least in my experience. I think average is the wrong word.
When I am in the mood for NSA sex, I approach someone who I find attractive. I don’t sit there and think “Look at that incredibly average guy. Maybe I’ll approach him.” I look for someone who I find appealing. They don’t need to be my dream guy (and I’m probably not their dream girl), but I do need to find them attractive.
As for success rate, I’ve only had two men *in my entire life *turn me down. One of them turned out to be gay (he later became a good friend) and the other tried to take me up on my offer at a later date (sorry buddy, that was a limited time offer).
i didn’t catch adverage Now that I did, I didn’t think adverage looking. Or even boring. Just not an artist, rock star, famous, rich, etcentric.
I stick mostly to 2. And 3 and 1. But I’m not usually all that verbal on the subject. Not directly. More flirting and eye contact and the odd brushing up against.
The one I was thinking of was this guy who I just met, the friend of a bunch of bar friends where I worked, was moving to Australia the next day. My passionate 19 year oid self said Not till I’m done with you. (And as far as adverage he was in many senses, but good looking enough I could have wrapped myself around him enough times I would have had to been checked in as carry on luggage).
So I spent the evening glancing come hither over the bar till I noted silken cords pulling him across the room. Does wonders for a teenager (and only recently ex-virgin) to feel like a femme fatale.
Here’s the thing, if he doesn’t clue in to the subtle body language, then he’s not going to clue in to other cues later on. So, it’s a test really. If he catches the subtle, I’m far more likely to get the enjoyment I’m looking for.
FTR, “picking up a guy” in this manner is something that has actually occurred only twice in my life, and not in the last ten years.
I honestly don’t know. I have never successfully picked up a random guy in a bar. I might let them pick me up, but in my experience, men are all about the chase. Any time I’ve approached a guy with direct assertiveness… nothing but FAIL.
I’m not completely unfortunate looking, nor am I a psychotic mess. Just. Don’t. Understand.
