Friend won't let me shower at his house, am I being unreasonable?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Water pipe burst in my front lawn. Lost all water, and water company came out and said it was their fault so they will repair it for free, however for the nest 2-3 days I won’t have water at my house at all.

For eating and drinking I already have several 5 gallon bottles of water so I can also use that for basic hygiene as well but I’m the type of person who absolutely needs a hot shower once a day to function. I don’t have a gym membership so I can’t use their showers (and looking it up they all want a $40 activation or annual fee plus tbe $20 monthly fee) so my first thought was to contact my friend who lives just 5 minutes away, especially since he has showered at my own house in the past a few times.

However texting him about taking a shower 2-3 times this week at his house was like me asking if I could have sex with his wife, he immediately got weirdly offended, asked me to tell him in full detail why I couldn’t shower at my own house, and then started to make excuses for everything instead of just denying me at first. I finally asked him “So you going to let me shower at your house or not?” And he just replied “Have fun being stinky”.

Now I’m angry at the fact I’ve let him shower at my house multiple times in the past and suddenly the one time I need that favor back he starts getting fucking fresh. And it’s not like his house his messy, I was there two weeks ago, he’s got 2 showers and his bathrooms look fine. And it’s not COVID related fears either, as I’ve been to his house multiple times this year.

2

Some people are just squicked out over things like that. You may have to bite the bullet and get a gym membership–unless there’s a truck stop close to where you live.

3

The fact that this friend used your shower several times, but now is completely unwilling to return the favor, is definitely unreasonable/jerkish behavior. Maybe there’s some strange subtext there that he’s not sharing, but I don’t think you’re being the unreasonable one.

Do you have other friends who live at least reasonably close by, who might be more willing to help?

4

Oh yeah, if he’s used your shower in the past, he certainly shouldn’t deny you use of his for a couple of days. Unless he did unspeakable things in your shower that he thinks you might do in his. If I was you, I would reconsider allowing him to use your shower in the future…and when you have running water again, scrub the fuck out of your shower just because it’s easier than finding brain bleach.

If you don’t want to put out the money for a gym membership, there are solar shower bags available from most outdoor stores. Heat the water on the stove and hang the bag over your shower head.

5

He doesn’t want you at his house for some reason. Maybe his wife cheats on him in the shower. I dunno, people can be weird, but maybe something he doesn’t want to explain right now. .And why did he have to shower at your place those times? Maybe he’s been renting out his place on Airbnb and doesn’t want you to know for some reason.

6

Is the OP Faye Valentine?

7

You call this person a friend?

8

Many gyms will let a member provide a friend a guest pass in the hope that the recipient will buy a membership. You might start asking around among your acquaintances.

You might also ask the water company they would consider putting you up in a Motel 6 for a couple of days.

But, no YANTA.*

*(You Are Not The Asshole)

9

Is this the same friend you scolded for not owning enough hats?

10

Yes, I’m telling you he’s an asshole!

11

All my other friends live on complete opposite side of town, I chose him because he’s the closest living to me that I don’t have to encounter any traffic getting to his house.

12

This so-called “friend” is a total jerk.

13

Friend is being weird and owes you an explanation.

I’d insist the water utility put me up in a hotel until they fixed what’s wrong.

Barring that, I’d probably buy several gallons of water at the grocery store and use the stove or microwave to warm it up and sponge bathe myself. 2-3 days isn’t that long to have to resort to that. Ever been camping?

14

I’d do this because i don’t want to have to get up, get dressed, pack my clean clothes, go someplace else for a shower, then go back home.

15

I have acquaintances that are better friends than that. They’d at least recognize returning the favor. My friend-friends would offer me the shower and a spare bedroom. Not sure about the hat, though.

16

When I lost my water supply, I hired a nearby budget hotel room for one night.

I was prepared to pay for an overnight stay (even though I didn’t need it), but once I politely explained, the management gave me a decent discount. :sunglasses:
From their point of view, they didn’t have to change the bed - and a bit of income was welcome in these pandemic times.

It also gave me an anecdote to tell… :wink:

17

I bet the gym would let you use their showers. Your friend is being weird.

18

I have to ask, if you are visiting him and need to use the toilet do you have to go home?

19

When our power goes so goes the well too. In the dark, can’t flush, can’t bathe, you improvise.

Winter we’re screwed for flushing water because the lake is iced over but otherwise with bottled water we can survive on sponge baths.

My MIL had no problem using our shower when visiting but using someone else’s washing machine would give her the heebie jeebies. Ridiculous!

20

Sponge bath for a couple days won’t kill you. Wash your face, armpits, and crotch (in that order!). You’ll be fine.

This guy is either 1. not your friend or 2. semi-crazy. Or both at the same time.