Express was having a sale on shirts today. Sweet! I can get them for thirty bucks each! They’re normally fifty!
So I swung by the mall on the way home from work. Picked out five shirts - two black, a brown, a light blue, and a plaid. I was out the door in maybe ten minutes.
So I dropped the bag in the bedroom when I got home, made some dinner, did a bit of homework. I was just procrastinating, see, because for each of my shiny new shirts, I knew I was going to have to…
[ol]
[li]Remove the three metal clips that hold it folded[/li][li]Remove the price tag[/li][li]Remove the size sticker[/li][li]Remove the tissue paper[/li][li]Remove the cardboard backing[/li][li]Remove the cardboard outer collar[/li][li]Remove the plastic inner collar[/li][li]Remove the plastic top button cover[/li][li]Fish out the in-situ collar stays, and place them in my collar stay jar[/li][li]Remove the little paper pouch of spare collar stays from the front button[/li][li]Remove the spare collar stays from the little paper pouch, and place them in my collar stay jar[/li][li]Unbutton the sleeve buttons[/li][li]Unbutton the front buttons[/li][li]Finally, THROW THE FUCKING THING IN THE HAMPER TO TAKE TO THE CLEANERS BECAUSE DESPITE ALL THE BULLSHIT, IT STILL NEEDS TO BE PROPERLY LAUNDERED AND PRESSED BEFORE I CAN FUCKING WEAR THE FUCKING THING, ANYWAY.[/li][/ol]
What the fuck? Why do they even bother? And Express is actually one of the best about this. Most of the department store brands come in plastic fucking bags with a half dozen little fucking bobby pins in lieu of the metal clips.
Button the fucking things if you must. Spray them with you itchy-ass sizing if you have to. But after that, will you please just fold them neatly? Maybe put them on a hanger? Please?
Oh, I feel your pain. I’ve always wondered why the mainstream dress shirt makers have to pin the collars shut on top of buttoning it closed AND putting the little “butterfly” plastic atop that button. One would figure that with the two collar shapers already in place,having the collar buttonend up would be enough… and of late I’ve found many makers limit their use of pins to as few as 3 (collar, and the two at the shoulder that pin them to the waist as it folds over the cardboard).
I just bought 2 button-down shirts that came all folded like mens’ shirts. Oy vey, what a pain in the ass!
And I’m a girl. We can’t just buy by size. We have to try the friggin’ things on.
So there I was, in the dressing room, with cardboard and clips and tissue paper flying everywhere and no garbage can anywhere to throw the stuff out. Meanwhile, my mom was with me and was patiently waiting for me to try the damn shirts on, and I was trying to hurry and the damn plastic thing on the collar WOULDN’T COME OFF!
I finally did get it off, and the shirts actually fit. But sheesh!
And I didn’t even have to deal with the collar stays.
This is probably the only area where women generally have an easier time buying clothes than men. I mean, it’s hell on earth to navigate the sizing, but at least our shirts don’t come bound and gagged.
Guys really can’t either, nowadays. They’ve added us to the victims of vanity sizing. hooray.
I went through all that rigamarole of hunting for pins, unbuttoning, etc., etc. last time I bought dress shirts. I’d bought “fitted” shirts. Apparently, “fitted” now means “mumu” – lovely things had about an extra yard of fabric that did nothing but pooch up at my waist.
I didn’t even bother folding them back up when I returned them – just handed back the shopping bag with plastic shirt bags, tissue paper, spare buttons, extraneous labels, and random pins all thrown inside.
Guess I’m going to try semi-custom tailored from Nordstrom’s next.
That was my first though on reading the OP. Just took the husband shopping yesterday for shirts; each one probably had 7-8 pins, and no doubt more will be turning up in the wash all week.
And then when you finally get to put it on after it’s been properly laundered, the tag pokes into the back of your neck. Like little prickles, because it’s made of some sort of cloth that has sharp edges when it’s folded up into the tag, and it’s sewn in place with bristly nylon thread just to make sure it irritates you all day long…
I’m annoyed by the over packaging of dress shirts as much as the next guy, but I wonder if OP would buy the same shirt if–in the exact same basic condition–it were just on a hanger, with some wrinkles, making it look like it were “pre-owned.” Would OP buy the shirt at, let’s say, $15, if it didn’t look so nice in its package?
They put all these things in to convince us that the garment is “pure.” Untouched by human hands. But the fact is that many human hands have touched it precisely so that you perceive–unconsciously or not–that it hasn’t been touched. And they’ve “touched” your shirt at such a meager wage that the company will make a profit even if they sell it at $10 a shirt. You think you’re getting a good deal? Well, not as good a deal as the manufacturer or the department store. You’re just that last chump on the line, and the people who stitch together your shirts, or who package them, would love to change places with you.
But then again, I have found a style / manufacturer that I LOVE, and this is the only style I wear now. Geoffrey Bean Sateen style. (Because I knew somebody would ask) I know my exact measurements, I know what size fits me despite what the tape measure says, and I always buy the same style of shirts. But not the colors. I try to adjust for seasons. (I’m a winter.)
Not to advocate a product/style, but these are wrinkle-free, wash and wear straight out of the dryer or off the hangar and quite durable. And as I have said before, I am a lazy bastard and hate chores such as laundry, so I like these shirts.
Depending upon which sale I hit or online, I can get these for between $25-40 each. Hit or miss.
Men’s dress shirts, which are standard attire for business professtionals, should be pressed if a guy wants to present himself as a professional. There are a couple guys here at my office who do not do this; their shirts often look like something they pulled out from under the bed. And frankly, it is my perception, that guys in rumpled dress shirts are the ones I find taking shortcuts, or producing inferior work. They’re also the same guys who come to meeting unprepared. Presenting a professional appearance is part of the job.
Since you don’t use a laundry service, you don’t know that this is no solution. Each of the two or three laundry services I’ve used in the past fifteen years, requests that collars and cuffs are unbuttoned when you drop them off. Sometimes they’ll even charge you if they’re not.
Yes. Shirts of shitty inferior quality that do not last. A quality dress shirt (assuming you’re not trying to get by with just a few), when properly cared for, should last in excess of 5 years.