And I think Spider-Baby tops that (from the same episode).
We should probably throw in a few Bob Newhart moments.
In one episode Bob was upset that Emily gave him a $1,500 watch. “Emily, you have to spend $1,500 on a piano, because a $20 piano is no good. But a $20 watch would do everything that this one does. And with the money left over, you could have bought… a piano.”
When Jerry was in therapy: “It’s always the same old thing with me. I meet a woman, we have a few drinks, we have a few laughs, then we end up at my place, or we end up at her place. Boring! I want something else, something more. On the other hand, I don’t want to give up the boring part.”
My favorite Bob Newhart episode had to be the Thanksgiving one where Bob had the guys over and they all got drunk.
-Ordering chinese food: “An order of goo-goo gai pan. Another goo-goo gai pan. MORE GOO TO GO!”
-Trying to tell knock-knock jokes: “Knock-knock!”, “Who’s there?”, “Don’t cry!”
-Everytime somebody took a swig out of the oversized wine bottle the doorbell buzzed and they would look back at the bottle.
-“That’s doctor Hartley. D-R-period. Derrrrrr.”
Frasier. The brothers host a fancy fundraising party for the opera and Frasier ends up having three women separately give him their business cards and say, “Call me,” while Niles has none. Frasier says with glee, “It’s like I’m catnip to them!” His expression and his little shrug of the shoulders really make the moment.
Friends. The Hanukkah Armadillo was classic, that’s for sure. But then there was the trivia contest that Ross refereed (“What is Joey’s favorite food?” “How many different ways does Monica sort hand towels?” “What is Chandler’s job?”). I just about died. And when Monica was dating the dentist played by Tom Selleck and Joey reacted negatively by saying, as he jabbed emphatically with his finger, “Ew! Ew ew ew!”
Roseanne. Roseanne and her sister Jackie are seeing a psychologist together to work through some family issues. Jackie talks quietly about what troubles her, but then gets on a roll and just talks and talks and talks, ending up practically screaming. There’s a moment of stunned silence, and Roseanne turns to the psychologist and says, “You better call for backup.”
Another WKRP moment (dialog not 100% accurate):
Jennifer is introducing her new macho boyfreind around the office, and they come up to Nessman.
Boyfreind: “I think a man’s name says a lot about who he is.” (Sticks out his hand to shake.) “My name’s Steele, what’s yours?”
Nessman (very sheepishly) “Les.”
“Cheers”. Frasier Crane to Cliff, after Cliff’s latest rambling nonsense: “Hello in there, Cliff. Tell me, what color is the sky in your world?”
Roseanne - When they find the weed in the garage, and smoke it in the bathroom. Jackie’s in the tub, “Is this the sink? AM I SHRINKING?”
A firend gave me the entire series on DVD–I had never seen it–and this was the line I pulled out for my thank-you note.
You are correct sir. That’s the all-time champ.
Fawlty Towers runner-up is when Basil is pantomiming to make Mrs. Richards think her hearing aid broken–Sybil inadvertently plays along–then he yells into the receiver.
My favorite Seinfeld moment is when Jerry and George, for the benefit of an old high school friend, are pretending they too hadn’t seen each other since high school. They immediately start ripping on each other, (“So I see you went bald, there”).
Some classics;
MAS*H – Captain Tuttle; also the episode where Hawkeye needs new boots and sets up a chain of favors for favors which inevitably collapses. Honorable mention to the Spam Lamb
Friends – Rachel, on tape: “Ross, have I ever told you about the time I went back-packing through western Europe?”
Barney Miller – Wojo: “You can point to any item in the Sears catalog and somebody wants to sleep with it.” (I quote this line a lot.)
My favorite WKRP scene is when Herb is trying to sell air time to a stereo salesman and they both pull the slick salesman routine on each other.
When Larry and Balky try to fix the showerhead on Perfect Strangers.
I particularly love the episode where Sam spends the whole episode reading War and Peace, to impress Frasier,(who dismisses it immediately), then finds out there is a movie!
Cheers:
Sam: I’m going up to Charlestown today to see Old Ironsides.
Woody: Wow, can you get me Raymond Burr’s autograph?
Sam: No, Woody, I’m talking about the ship the USS Constitution. Its nickname is Old Ironsides.
Woody: Yeah, I know. Raymond Burr is going to be there. Can you get me his autograph?
This is sort of an early model Rule 34.
From Curb Your Enthusiasm:
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Larry gets a “happy ending” ending masseuse for his father as a birthday gift. His father doesn’t doesn’t realize that she treats all her clients in that “special” way and determines that she’s in love with him.
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“I’m taking her to the doctor. She has a rash on her pussy.”
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When Larry is sleeping over at the Greene’s and their daughter starts practicing her singing in the morning. Larry, still sleeping, doesn’t realize that he’s not in his own house and starts yelling: “Shut the fuck up! Shut the FUCK up!!!”
Plus, pretty much any scene involving Leon.
And of course there is the classic Jack Benny bit where he is being heldup by a gunman. The dialogue went:
Gunman: Your money or your life!
.
.
.
Gunman: I said Your money or your life!
Benny: I know, I know. I thinking!
Everyone talks about that “Niles bumbling around the apartment” bit, but for my money, the best thing on Frasier was the radio play, when all the actors bailed and Roz had just had a bunch of dental work done, so Niles had to do all the parts.
Damn you for beating me to that comment.
let me add a few youtube clips that are from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Not episodic. NOT SAFE FOR WORK clips!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UE6GC47NxgI Dayman/Nightman
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIs5BYWt_SM Devito Sex Tape
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xQSk-_zh-0 Dick Towel
and finally the vulgar outtakes of Better Off Ted episode regarding HR memo error.
