I was parking my park at church where the lot has a noticeable slope about it. I set the parking brake and put the shifter (manual) in second when I noticed another car of the exact same make and model rolling driverless down the slope. The car makes it through the parking lot and crosses two lanes of traffic without incident. Just as the car is about to go nose first into a ditch, two folks come running out of nowhere as if they were going to catch up to the car, get in front of it and stop it from landing in the ditch in time. Didn’t happen. By the time they get there the car is almost straight up and down in the ditch with the rear end up in the air.
They look at each other, look at the car, shrug their shoulders and head to church.
(It did not appear the vehicle suffered any significant damage.)
My street is kind of narrow, and there was this big ass truck, with a big ass shed type building on the back of it. It sloooooowly rolled up to the corner, turned the wheels and sat there for awhile. Then slooooooowly starts backing up. As it starts to roll by my house I notice how close the wheels are to the edge of the street. The street is several inches higher than our yard, and I just knew one of the wheels was going to slip into the yard and either get stuck or dig up the yard. So I’m looking out the window, concentrating on the wheels… Imaging my surprise when I see my mailbox flying thru the air. :rolleyes:
It wasn’t recent, but a while back I was driving to work and saw a van with the license plate “MENSA8” or something along those lines … and the gas cap was open.
Sometimes I like to just stand by my upstairs window and watch the world go by. There was one occasion when the rather, let’s say, rubinesque lady who lives across the street opens her front door carrying a sack of garbage ready for pickup. She must have just been to the toilet beforehand, because her skirt was tucked firmly into the back of her undies.
As if that wasn’t funny enough, on her way back indoors, she stops and BENDS OVER to straighten her doormat. As it is, I try to avoid her as much as possible anyway, but nowadays I just cannot look her in the eye. I think I’ve seen more than enough of her already.
I went to my favorite Thai restaurant today and they had put up a sign saying something along the lines of “We are no longer accept personal check! Effect (date)”
I love the restaurant and I’m a regular there and it’s obvious all of the people there are doing a great job with their English and all. But it’s the first time I’ve actually seen “engrish” in real life and it amused me.
I posted it when I did it, but it still cracks me up every time I think about looking in the rear view mirror and realizing that I was being followed by 20 feet of severed gas pump hose.
I’m currently in the middle of a run of “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat”. There’s part toward the end where the narrators sing
Well, during a practice about a week and a half ago, the director called a cut right before there, which somehow distracted one of the narrators without really registering. So the action stops entirely, leaving one narrator to belt out
That might be a had-to-be-there thing, but it was pretty funny at the time.
Also, our department head has a sense of humor about the fact that our department has a lot more girls than guys in it, which can cause some issues picking shows and casting them. Anyway, he made and hung a sign in the backstage area that read, in fancy script, Chick Theater. That was funny in itself, but we came back one day to find that the sign had been turned around, and there was a new title that someone had put on the back: Dick Theater. That’s still there
Well, this happened a while ago but it was pretty damned funny.
I went to a Ren Fair with my girlfriend. One of the shows was a hypnotist (Why he was at a Ren Fair I never did figured out). This guy gets about 15 people on stage and does his thing. About half way through the act he tells his subjects that they are on Mars and it is really hot. One of his subjects was a woman. She was sitting in the middle. She was wearing a dress. When she was told that she was on Mars and that it was really hot she hiked up her dress and starts fanning herself. That wouldn’t be so bad except she wasn’t wearing any panties. She was flapping away and the audience, myself included, were laughing like loons. The guy running the show didn’t see his subject giving the audience the full view.
Whenever we are ready to give our son (7 months old) a bath, we take him to his bedroom, strip him down, and turn on the water in the bath tub. He takes off crawling full-speed ahead for the bathroom and tries to climb into the tub. It’s really amusing to watch a naked baby crawling as fast as he can.
I was at a poolside party last night, and the pool had one of those multiple level diving boards (3, IIRC). And a sign was hung on the side of the lowest board: “SHALLOW WATER. NO DIVING”
Last weekend I was out having some drinks with a pal and some loon who, I gather, had a bit too much went out onto the empty dance floor, attempted to get a girl to dance with him and after all of 30 seconds or so fell right over and did sort of a cartwheel onto his face. That was pretty funny …
Two years ago in September, I was heading back to my dorm after class. I cut across the Oval, and for all you nonBucks, the Oval is this giant grassy oval in the center of campus where everyone sleeps, studies, plays frisbee, etc., the main point being that it is huge. I passed two girls who were having a fight and really yelling at each other, because apparently they made plans to meet half an hour earlier on the oval and it took them that long to find each other.
Good grief people, there’s hundreds of people on the oval in September, you couldn’t have said, let’s meet in the center of the Oval, the east side, near the library, near Hayes Hall, near anywhere - why on earth would you say, let’s meet on the oval, and then be mad when you can’t find each other?
In the pub a few months ago I saw a man come out of the Gents toilet, stride purposefully through the packed bar back to his table … with several feet of toilet paper stuck to the bottom of his shoe.
I thought that only happened in the movies! He turned beetroot when he realised, the poor sap.
I left my downtown office to grabs some lunch, and walking down the street I heard a loud, dull “THUNK!”, then a car alarm and a deranged cackle (kind of like the Wicked Witch of the West, but less shrill and more croaky.) As everyone does, I completely ignored the car alarm (useless pieces of shit, they are!)
Then I heard it again: THUNK!.. THUNK!.. THUNK!.. then a different car alarm, followed by the cackling laughter.
It was a homelss woman dragging her wheely-cart full of belongings up the street. To amuse herself, as she was walking up the street, she was giving the hood of each car a solid thump with the palm of her hand to try to make alarms go off.
I watched her for a few minutes taking great delight in this game each successful thump that resulted in an alarm was met with peals of laughter!
This was my sr. year of college, and the campus I was on was full of grassy spots surrounded by chains in order to “keep kids off the grass.” We never took them seriously and would hop/leap/soar or step over them on a regular basis.
One day, my roomate came back to the room with a story of how she very, very nearly came to a bad end over the chain on the way home. We giggled, she re-enacted, and decided it was a good thing to tease her about.
Fast forward to evening- Roomie and I are taking a hike to the dining hall and I am offhandedly giving her a hard time about nearly eatin’ it over the chain. I’m laughing and walking and completely oblivious to the fact that I’m very very slowly catching one toe in the chain myself…I let out a whoah, whoah, as I take a full 10 seconds to land on my face, a look of utter shock on my very dirtly face.
I realized that it was only karmic justice coming around with a swiftness, so I laid on the ground convulsing with laughter as I realized exactly HOW MANY people saw me take my tumble. I have humbly promised to never make fun of people falling over again…
I was standing outside in my backyard, which is fenced in, waiting for my dogs to poop. The lot behind my house contains a small apartment complex, for which the dumpster is right next to my fence near the back of my yard.
I witnessed a rather large man with a big potbelly, dressed in nothing but bikini underwear/swimsuit?, pushing a wheelchair across their parking lot in driving rain. He got to the dumpster, took a bag of trash off the wheelchair, turn around and pushed the wheelchair back into his apartment.
Maybe you had to be there but it was one of the oddest/funny sights I’ve seen just randomly standing in my own backyard. It made me wonder:
•_Why is this man wandering around outside in his underwear
•_Why do men with large potbellies wear teeny little bikini bottoms?
•_Why did he need a wheelchair to take his trash out? Couldn’t he have just carried the bag?
•_What the hell is he doing with a wheelchair to begin with?
•_He couldn’t wait until it stopped raining, get dressed, then take the trash out? Must have been a trash emergency…
