How do you tell which end of the worm is the head?
(scroll down)
Tickle it in the middle and see which end smiles.
Why does the Statue of Liberty stand in New York Harbor?
Because she can’t sit down.
Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes, because the Empire State Building can’t jump at all.
How do you get down from an elephant?
You don’t get down from an elephant. You get down from a goose.
Can we use spoiler tags please?
You know [ spoiler ] *answer here * [/spoiler ] without the spaces.
Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat?
Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals!
Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ask the question?
Johnny: It’s because I saw one on daddy’s lettuce, but now it’s gone
What did zero say to eight?
Nice belt.
Which reminds me of Why does 6 fear 7.
Because 7 ate 9
Credit to my Daughter.
I assume the reason the OP had all those spaces was to avoid the dreaded mouseover spoiler spoiler.
Why can’t a bicycle stand up by itself?
Because it’s two-tired.
Correct – but you’ll note I did use a spoiler.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot
The spoiler request was just a reminder as Scumpup had forgot. I included the how to as it usually gets asked after someone requests they get used.
I just thought jokes work better if the punch line is hidden.
Also twickster had started us that way.
So anyway.
Why are elephants wrinkled?
Have you ever tried to iron one?
Jim
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
Unique up on it!
How do you catch a tame rabbit?
Tame way!
giggles idiotically
I love kid jokes. 
You shouldn’t tell a secret in a corn field.
Because of all the ears!
What’s brown and sticky?
A Stick!
I think by now this one deserves enshrinement as the Official SDMB Joke.
If you’re American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come back out, what are you when you’re in the bathroom.
You’re a peein’
What happens when a cow jumps over a picket fence?
Udder destruction!
Tiny Weasel: Daddy, want to hear a dirty joke?
Madd Maxx: Sure, I love a good dirty joke.
Tiny Weasel: A cow fell into a mud puddle.
Madd Maxx: 
Tiny Weasel: ::giggles uncontrolably for ten minutes::
Q: What kind of cats love the water?
Octo-Pussies.
Q: Who is the dogs favourite comedian?
Growlcho Marx.
Q: What’s a porcupine’s favorite food?
Prickled onions.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
Q: What’s black and white and makes a lot of noise?
A zebra with a drum.
Q: What were the only creatures not to go into the Ark in pairs?
The Maggots, they went in an apple.
Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chickens day off.
Q: What do you get if you pour boiling water down a rabbit hole?
Hot cross bunnies.
Q: What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment!
This is by far my favourite joke of all time. It really suits any situation.
Now…
What do you call an empty jar of Cheez Whiz?
Cheez WAS!!!
A rope walks up to a bar and asks for a beer. The bar keep looks at him askance and huffs, “We don’t serve rope around here.” So, the rope walks outside, tangles himself up, frays his ends, and walks back up to the bar and asks for a beer. The bar keep looks him over, and growls “Aren’t you the rope that was just in here?” The rope says:
Nope! I’m afraid not!