Okay … carry on …
A : Plastic Surgery
Question: What are Cher’s two favorite words?
Answer: A cup of butter and a mixing bowl.
Question: what do I need to make a batch of really crappy cookies?
Answer: A speculum and a large grin.
Q. My new career?
A. A ton of bricks…
Q. What do you need to build a quality shithouse?
A. A 55-gallon drum of canola oil.
Q: What did the Asian Princes get for his birthday?
A: Johny Quest and Haji
Q: Name two Aryan cartoon characters.
A: Bubble and squeak.
Q: Name two posterior emanations you’d rather not know about.
A: Glowing seepage.
Q. What was the FBI’s first hint that something was amiss in the Johnsons’ bathroom?
A. A pregnant badger.
Q: What does my Physics instructor resemble?
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A: Two Canadian pennies and a single shoelace
Q: What’s really hard to explain to your parents?
A: Two flat tires and a Duck.
Q: What makes up the hottest bikini top this summer?
A: A fifth of Absolut and Optimus Prime.
Q: How did that video of Megatron making love to a volkswagen originate?
A: Lust for a dingo and hunger.
Q. Name 2 things Merc dreamed about last night?
A. Spam, Spam, Spam, Eggs, and Ham.
Q. After three months of arduous fighting in World War II, what was fast becoming Sam I Am’s food(s) of preference?
A. Under Pressure
Q: What is the reason Astroboy needs a new rubber woman… or a patching kit… whichever he can find first?
A: A whip, a Volkswagon Beetle, and a handfull of vasoline.
Q: Name three things that can be involved with having sex in an uncomfortable place.
A: Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Q; Why did so many Americans vote for Bush?
A: The refridgerator door was still open, if that’s any indication.
Q: How did those leftovers get halfway across the kitchen floor?
Q: You said you’d bought a rubber outfit. What the hell are you wearing?
A: They long to be close to you.
Q: Name something that every female, and some male, Dopers have in common. 
A: Chocolate syrup, regulation bikinis, nimble fingers and 6½" of wild and wacky fun.