Headlines:
Woman Missing
Gov’t Official: ME Victory Not Overnight, Making Progress
CEO Indicted
Cruise/Jolie/Holmes/Pitt
More Cruise/Jolie/Holmes/Pitt
and more…
A Serious Crime Was Committed
A Celebrity Made a Public Appearance
Several Sports Teams Competed
Weather Will Occur
No rain in Sydney - again
Conflict in Middle East.
Officials say blaze sparked by fireworks.
Old Pope, Franco, still dead.
Old white guy gains prominent political office.
Political activists call current administration stupid/incompetent/evil.
Ambitious NASA program cancelled.
Parents groups protest new video game.
Airliner manufacturer unveils new, improved, trash hauler.
Breathtaking, amazing new anime released.
New for fall TV lineup: show about a single white girl in the city working for a magazine. [OK, I ripped that one off.]
Evidence of grotesque, unimaginable crimes discovered. “Trial of the Century” to begin soon.
Researchers say nuclear fusion could be available in 40 years.
It’s been done, to perfection, here. Still makes me laugh two years later.
No trains in Sydney - again
Celebrity shills new movie
LONDON: Jordan gets drunk, falls down, flashes paparazzi
LOS ANGELES: Anna-Nicole gets drunk, falls down, flashes paparazzi
Diet, Exercise Control Weight
Shocking New Health Risks
Common Vitamin Linked to Cancer
Stress: A Silent Killer
Americans Fat.
Intoxicated Teenager Injures Self