Get your Humongous Breasts (rant) here!

The BBQ Pit
1

Arghhhh! There’s just no escaping it!

What’s this fascination that everyone seems to have with titan titties? The desire of every woman to have humongous hooters? The desire of every man to date a woman with mountainous melons?

Would you be able to explain to an alien race that some of us humans are willing to undergo dangerous mutilation just to have enlarged milk sacs?

By dangerous mutilation, of course, I mean enhancement surgery. A couple of years ago I saw an episode of Rikki Lake (admitedly a show where the combined IQ of the participants barely exceeds that of Winter temperatures in Lapland) where some perfectly lovely girls with tasty and delectable pencil erasers wanted desperately to get surgery so that they could look like bug-eyed tropical fish. It pissed me the hell off.

OK, I realize that a) All breasts are good breasts, and b) Most people prefer big breasts, and it’s all good, but sheesh! Must I be the sole voice in the wilderness to attest to the absolute yumminess of the speed bump? Must I be the only one in the world to say that the quality of a woman is not directly proportional to her bra size? Must I point out that of all the weird fetish porn sites out there, there are maybe only four that are devoted to itty bitty titties? And all four of them suck scissors? Must I point out that I know this because, er, uh, a friend told me, yeah, that’s it?

cue inspirational music

No more, I say! IBT women of the world, unite! Stand and be counted! Go bra-less in a white T-shirt! Proudly yell “I’m a flatty, and I’m damn sexy because of it!” Fail that pencil test with pride!

inspirational music reaches climax

sniff Dammit, IBT women, be proud of who you are! Revel in your gravity-defying hooterosity! SHOW US YOUR TITS!

IBT women of the world, I salute you! And not just with my hands!

This rant was inspired by that ridiculous goatee thread.

2

I likes me the boobies. Pretty much in general.

3

Hat freak show boobs. More than a mouthful is wasteful. Bring on the “a”

4

Thanks, tdn. I’ll just consider this thread my Christmas present. :slight_smile:

5

Boobies in the largish-C to smallish-D size range. Fer chrissakes, that’s **all ** I ask.

6

I forgot to mention this:

When I’ve told flat-chested women that I like flat-chested women, they’ve gotten downright pissed off at me. What’s up with that?

Unless, of course, it’s like a woman telling a man “Wow, you’ve got one sexy penis – I LOVE when they’re tiny like that!”

7

Cool. :cool: Got anything for me?

8

That is precisely what it’s like.

All we want to hear is, “Yours are perfect.”

9

For tdn, Season’s Greetings

(o)(o)

10

swoon

11

Not without a cite. :wink:

12

I’m going to have to agree with malkavia on that. It’s not the sentiment that’s getting you in trouble, it’s the phrasing.

But, I do appreciate the sentiment from the bottom of my…er…heart. Dung Beetle will you share your Christmas present with me?

In the spirit of giving tdn

Boobie Flash

()()/

13

Natural > Artificial
Big > Small

Natural Small > Big Artificial

All else being equal.

14

Look, what would be the healthiest thing for everyone concerned would be to say “whatever size your breasts are (unless they’re causing you physical pain or disfigurement) they’re perfect.”

None of this “I only like C cups” or “anything smaller than a B/ bigger than a D is just ugly”.

Breasts vary enormously in size.

There is no “ideal”.

Get over it.

15

I feel honor-bound (not to mention sexually stimulated) to inform you both that yes, in fact, I will be in Florida next week.

16

I tend to prefer natural breasts, but I have seen a few girls who get implants but don’t go overboard with it, they go from a B to a C for example. So long as it works with your frame, it’s great. But if you try to get as top heavy as possible, don’t expect me to play with them.

Okay, that last line is a lie. I love boobies and will play with any I can get my hands on. But I still prefer natural.

17

Pretty much. A friend mentioned the other day that I’m not exactly ‘big’, and I got miffed at her. I know I’m flat-chested, and I really hate people pointing it out. Now, to be fair to my friend, I pointed it out first, but it’s different when someone else says it. I’m insecure about my body, and saying that you like flat-chested women would just be playing into that insecurity.

18

<ponders his own size 7-3/4 hats… …visualizes size by forming hands around that approximate diameter>
Seems like a good size to me.

My own experiments have consistently proven this statement to be be false.

19

Ain’t nothing wrong with some big ole natural titties. But I like ‘em in all sizes, so long as they’re purty, and most of the fellers I know feel the same way; so I don’t rightly understand what the OPs makin’ such a fuss about.

20

I’ll take small over pedulous any day.