Glenn Beck bravely stands up against the tyranny of a shadowy force of jack-booted thugs unleashed on the god-fearing American populace, a cabal of freeloaders growing fat on their socialist $167/bi-monthly stipend of YOUR tax dollars, a rogue, dare I say mercenary, ‘Civilian National Security Force’ spawned by Clinton – yes, I’m talking about those child-tutoring, house-building, sandbag-stacking hordes of dark soldiers at B-Rock Obama’s command: AMERICORPS.
Check out Beck, Bellavia, and Spalding being concerned at photos of happy, smiling Americorps members holding power tools and removing brush. At about 1:56 Beck openly questions why America needs “a national security force inside… Can you come up with [an enemy]?” His commentator, David Bellavia, then all but compares Americorps to Saddam Hussein’s fedayeen and suggests that The Left is planning to send out Americorps to take away the arms of radical militia. I especially like his eyebrow quirk when he says “This is scary stuff!” It really hammers home the comparison.
Beck’s voice trembles with emotion as he goes on to point out the obvious similarities between Hitler’s SS (racially pure and fanatically loyal to the Nazi party) and Americorps (18-24-year-olds who volunteer to build trails in national parks and shingle Habitat houses for ten months). Matthew Spalding is convinced that Americorps is even more despotic than first suspected – clearly the program is meant to “change people’s character” so as to promote their “allegiance to the state”. Glenn Beck pleads for the White House to reconsider it’s mad plot to destroy the fabric of American society by creating these Americorps programs (which have already existed since 1994, or in the case of VISTA, much longer than that) lest brainwashed AmeriHitler Youth run rampant in the streets, burning down churches and dragging back white women for Obama’s harem.
Truly, mine eyes have seen the glory. But it is too late for me. Already I’m 7 months into my second year of Americorps NCCC, which means that I am probably far too gone to be saved. Lured by the promise of untold riches amounting to a somewhat less than $5,000 scholarship, I sold my soul to the evil of national service. Overcome by my selfish desire to drive around in a bright red 15-passenger van with 7 other young people of varying ethnicities and ages, I have done my part to contribute to the destruction of the American dream. It is too late for me. koff koff But it is not… too late… for you.
Maybe we wouldn’t need Americorps if the National Guard (which is suppose to do these kinds of things) hadn’t been shipped overseas to kill and be killed.
Believe me, if Beck ever were to face a real army of “jack booted thugs” he’d shit his pants so quickly, he’d be picking his intestines up off the ground.
Point of order, the national guard is not supposed to do those types of things. It’s a military force. Say it with me. military. Military forces are not really (notice the qualifier) supposed to be used domestically.
Hence americorps.
Speaking of americorps, I’m broke. Can I get a couple of these fascist, despotic, jack booted college kids wanting scholarships to patch the hole in my drywall?
Nah, I’ll do it myself. Government labor never works out right.
Well, that video frightened me and made worry about the fate of America. But only because I know there are millions of people out there who actually believe that crap.
You mean the footprints in my soundstage outside of Houston? With all their black helicopters and shit, they still didn’t remember to bring a simple shop-vac to suck up all the “moon” dust. There were fifty fucking G-men in my building and it’s me that ends up doing the god damn sweeping.
Wow, Americorps is going to get “half a trillion” dollars?! Strangely, their budget, freely available online, says their budget for 2010 is about $1.1 billion.
The conspiracy thickens.
In honor of Beck and Co’s mention of Hitler, I invoke the Hitler smiley designed by jsgoddess:
And… as I finish listening to this broadcast, I get to the part where Beck calls Americorps members “communists.” Those insidious Hitler-loving communists, I presume.