"God sent his son"

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

… that was it. That was the entirety of the message, on one of those church message sign thingys where they post inspirational messages. Don’t know if the person putting it up ran out of a particular letter, or had to go pee, or what.

Is it ever so wrong of me that as I continued driving along my brain started filling it in? :smiley:
God sent his son …

… out for a pack of smokes and a six-pack.
… to private school and college and that ungrateful &*$%! never even calls anymore.
… a nice batch of cookies.
… to his room. Naughty savior! Very naughty!
Your turn!

2

and got him back marked “Postage Due”.

3

…and all He got was this crummy t-shirt

4

…because he couldn’t be bothered with going himself.

5

… for some bread and milk, and he didn’t give back the change.

6

… and that’s why there are Arians in the world.

… and if he fails, the Secretary will disavow all knowledge.

7

…to the John. 3:16.

8

When’eth thy come back, I command thee to bring pie.

9

Holy crap. I know what a number 1 is, and what a number 2 is, but I hate to think what a number 3:16 is!

10

The Gospel according to John, chapter 3, verse 16:

11

Holy crap, indeed.

12

… Swimming one day, over the pond and far away…

13

Now I have to check to see what the pi verse is.

14

"God sent his son"

…to an undisclosed location until it all blows over

…a “Happy 2000th birthday” cake with a stripper inside. Well, OK, God borrowed the stripper from Satan, he has all the good looking women.

15

…out for pizza and beer, but He stayed out on a three day drunk. The pizza was cold and the beer was warm when He finally got back to the house.

Kids these days!

16

… his latest move for the “Star Defenders of Arcturus” PBM game, but the little bastard refused to trade him some food in exchange for missile racks.

17

tough to swim when every time you try to step into the water you walk on it.

18

A birthday present with some new jewelry for his piercings.
Too soon?

19

…and then cut Him out of the Will.

20

…to find Obi-Wan Kenobi, for he was His only hope.