Little background before we get to the meat of the situation:
-I have 2 brothers. One, John, is 3 years older, at 45. Erick is younger, at 35.
-my father died in early 2001. He was a retired firefighter who suffered 3 heart attacks in 4 days. At the time of his death, he was involved in a class-action suit against the city of Louisville for unpaid overtime, sick days, etc. The lawsuit was settled a few years ago, and my stepmother received a check for around 100k. She kept half, and divided the other half among his 3 sons. We all received roughly 26k each.
-my mother was found dead at her house just before Mother’s Day.
So my older brother is trying to screw me over. When Mom died, I didn’t have the funds to pay my share of the funeral expenses. John paid mine, with the understanding that I would reimburse him my portion when her life insurance paid. My mother was working at Walmart when she died, and they paid the equivalent of one year’s salary, roughly 18k.
When that came in (Erick was listed as the sole beneficiary, so he actually went to the bank and withdrew the exact amount, and gave me my portion. He was also going to deliver John’s portion to him. We all took 1k off of the top, to give to my mom’s sole grandchild, John’s daughter Kiera, who is 14. She worshiped the ground that Kiera walks on, and we knew that Mom would want her to have some), I took my share of the expenses, and handed them right back to Erick. As he was going to deliver the money to John, he agreed to take my payment, too.
John and I have not really had the most tumultuous relationship. It’s been slightly antagonistic at times, because I was Mom’s black sheep. John, her first child, gave her her granddaughter, and Erick, the baby, shits diamonds out of a platinum asshole. If God had appeared to her and said that He was taking her family up to Heaven, to sit at His right hand for eternity, I’m convinced that she would have said, “okay. That sounds great. But you gotta get out of Erick’s chair.”
I was the one that my mother said that she wished she would have aborted. For Christmas a few years ago, she got Erick a really nice watch, something in the $300-$400 range. She got John something equally nice (I don’t remember what at the moment). I got a set of Spider-Man sheets.
So, back to the present. Erick took John my share of the funeral expenses. This was in May. Erick is the one that everyone trusts. He’s not the sort of person who would fuck you over. He’ll be brutally honest, even if you don’t want to hear it. He’s a Captain in the KY Prison System. He’s the golden boy.
So he delivered my money to John. Now, John is saying that I never paid him for the funeral expenses. I’ve told him that I have. Erick told him that he has, therefore I have. However, Erick doesn’t remember the exact dollar amount (he says he’s “89% sure” that it was paid in full. John is using this to claim that Erick is not 100% sure that I paid him).
So, we had also decided to sell mom’s car, and split the money 3 ways. If one of us decided to keep it, they would have to buy the others out. Not a major amount. We were going to sell the car for $1800, or $600 each.
Erick’s girlfriend Mandy tells me the other day that John has decided to keep Mom’s car, so he owes me $600. At the time, I can use it (I stupidly made a loan to the sister of a friend, who then vanished for a few weeks. She fedexed a check to me for the amount she borrowed. I deposited it, the funds became available, so I started paying bills, etc. A few days later, the funds are recalled. It’s looking like a forged check, and I am now $1500 overdrawn in my bank account).
I text John to ask about the $600. here’s the text exchange:
Me: Wait…don’t you owe me money? I think like $600 from Mom’s car
John: You may want to recheck the balance of your share of the funeral expenses
Me: I’ve already given you the money for that. Erick gave you my share of it in full
Me: It was the day that he brought you the money for you and Kiera
John: I would definitely remember you giving me money. I’m racking my brain. Give me a bit.
Me: I didn’t see you. I gave it to Erick, and he gave it to you when he brought yours
-----Next Day
Me: When would be a good time to come by and pick that money up?
John: First off, I’m still not convinced that you paid me. Second, I don’t have all of it right now.
Me: If you don’t believe me, ask Erick. He gave it to you for me. And I need at least some.
John: I did ask Erick. He can’t say for certain either [the previously mentioned 89%]
Me: He told me that he gave it to you in full
John: Why would he bring me $478 for no reason?
Me: When he gave me my share, I turned around and gave him the part that I owed you. He gave it to you when he brought yours and Kiera’s shares. Why would you say no reason?
John: Because Kiera didn’t have a share until the insurance money came in. We had 2 SS# checks come in before that.
Me: What does that have to do with anything? I gave him your money when he brought yours to you. I don’t understand why you think the order the checks came in is important. I gave you your money. You have to buy me out of her car.
John: I don’t have to do shit. But I’m trying to be fair and I do not remember you paying me. Erick isn’t 100% either.
Me: The car is divided among all of us. If you decide to keep it, you have to buy us out. You DO have to do shit. We all agreed to sell it and split the money, or buy the other 2 out if one of us kept it.
And I suppose I’m going to have to talk to Erick, because you’re being an asshole.
John: I’M being an asshole?? I’m not demanding money from you. I haven’t asked you for the first dime since I paid your share, have I?
Me: You know why? Because I paid you. There’s no need to demand money because none of mine is owed to you.
John: The more you push that you did, the harder it is for me to believe you
Me: That makes absolutely no sense. You’re accusing me of not having paid you, and I did. Why is it unbelievable?
John: Because you never pay anyone. You always turn everything around so you come out clean.
Me: I gave the money to Erick to give to you. He just texted me saying that he thinks I’m right, and that he’s told you that.
John: He isn’t 100%, he said
Me: [after getting a group text going, and Erick verifying what I’ve said repeatedly] Did you see his message?
Me: I’m going to need something fairly soon. I have $50 to last for about 3 weeks.
John: I can maybe give you another $50 on Thursday
Me: Okay
---------------August 26
Me: What time tomorrow would be good for me to grab some of that money? I’m off work in old Louisville [area of Louisville, KY, close to downtown, and around the UofL campus…about 45 minutes closer to him than if I were coming from home] at 7am. I really don’t want to drive back to La Grange, drive to New Albany and back, then drive back tomorrow night to go to work again
Me: [over 8 hours later] What time tomorrow?
John: I don’t even know if I’ll have an extra $50. I said maybe not definitely. I have all the bills now remember [because he was living with Mom when she died, and he’s stayed in the house she was renting]
Me: And I have work in Louisville, a quarter tank of gas, about 2 dollars to my name for 2 weeks. I need something, John.
John: Take a payday loan out. I can’t give you something you I don’t have
Me: I can’t do a payday loan. I told my bank I didn’t want checks. Just a card, and you’re trying to screw me over.
John: No I’m not. If anyone is, its you. I still don’t believe you paid me. Now you want me to give you money that you supposedly already paid me. I still have that conversation that we had telling you I MAY be able to give you something. If you want, I’ll send you a screenshot of it.
Me: I have it, too. Erick told you that I paid you. Is he trying to screw you?
John: Him? No he isn’t. I don’t remember you paying me. That would be something I’d remember. I don’t have any odd deposits in my bank accounts…either of them.
Me: Erick gave you the money. He’s told you that. By extension, if you disbelieve me, you think he’s lying, too. You owe me 600. I’ll take $400 so that your pride isn’t damaged
Me: and FYI, it was him and Mandy who told me about this in the first place
John: I don’t have to give you anything. I could sell the car and nobody would get anything til it’s sold. So don’t start anything. Erick said he isn’t 100% sure, but to keep himself neutral, he said that you did. I have no proof that you did. I have plenty of proof that you didn’t. It doesn’t matter. I’m going to bed, If I have it, I’ll let you have it. If I don’t, then I won’t.
John: I’m going to bed
Me: What proof do you have that I haven’t? NONE. Would you like the screen shot of Erick’s saying that I gave him the money to give to you? Because I have it.
No evidence that I did? John, in legal terms, absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. In other words, the fact that you have no “odd” deposits doesn’t mean shit. I gave Erick a little over to round up to the nearest dollar. Not my fault that you can’t remember shit correctly.
Me: Yeah. Go to bed. Your fucking solution to everything.
John: You just made the decision for me. I’m going to take this car to the nearest dealer and sell it for what I can. Thanks for screwing everybody in this process. I’m still coming out behind because I have to pay for my gas and time to hunt for the divorce records and pay for the title and transfer into my name to be able to sell it
Me: Well, you’re willing to fuck over your own daughter for money. Why not the rest of us, too?
John: What the hell are you talking about??
Me: I’m talking about me and Whit [my now ex-wife] giving T [John’s ex-wife, Teressa] $500 for Kiera’s school clothes and books a few years ago because you didn’t want her to know about it [from the money we got from my father’s settlement]
John: I have no idea what you’re talking about. But it doesn’t matter because you’re always right in everything you do and everyone else is a piece of shit. I’m going to bed now. I have to work tomorrow
Me: I’m sure you have no idea. But ask Whit. Or T. They’ll tell you. I think Erick knows, too. If you still believe him about things.
----------------August 28
Me: So T tells me that you are aware that I gave her money for Kiera’s school clothes a few years ago. She knows this because she tells you that I care more about your daughter than you do.
She also said that she hasn’t received any of that 3k that we all gave. And her college is already paid for. So where did that money go?
And if you’re going to fuck over your family for a girl, at least have the balls to admit it [he recently reconciled with his high school girlfriend, when she abandoned her husband and kids in another city to move in with him. It’s been since this happened that he’s started this thing with the money]
John: You know what you piece of shit. I have had it with you. I have Kiera’s money. I haven’t spent it. Not that that matters, you are a leech that preys off of other people, Your [sic] still pissed because uou [sic] didn’t get that $600. I told you that I had to sell it first. You forced my hand my being such a pain in the ass. So you can take a big FUCK YOU and just stop talking to me. I have had it with your incessant whining. You have 2 options, 1 lose my number or 2, I will block you. I don’t need this shit that you are trying to start. Everything was fine until you decided to try to extort more money from me. So just piss off. I am serious the next text or phone call from you gets you a one way ticket to being blocked
Now, I really don’t give a shit about being blocked. But I don’t see how I’m extorting him.
Yeah, maybe I hit below the belt with the “fuck over your daughter” comment.But I really don’t see anything I did deserving the increasing aggression.
Yeah, I probably should have arranged a receipt. That’s my fault.
So…am I REALLY in the wrong here? Am I such a bad guy for wanting what is rightfully mine? I just want my fair share.
