No troll advice please based on my other threads. Need some now.
She’s asking to meet me and hang out, but she seems really into me. Like she really likes me.
When i was YOUNGER girls would just straight up pick me up from my house and take me to theirs and we would just go swimming. But this was after talking for awhile.
Is it too forward to say something like “let’;s chill at your place and go swimming. do you have a pool?” because i used to do that a lot and people didn’t seem creeped out by it at all.
But i wonder if i just met some girl online and if i say that even if she likes me if that will be " too much"
I don’t have a lot of money, so i know that’s a problem, but hteres gotta be a way around it.
Be masculine and exhibit confidence and agency. Hanging out is fine. Usually, however, you invite someone over to your place, or tacitly suggest that they invite you.
What do you mean by exhibit agency? Hanging out is fine for a FIRST time seeing her though?
How exactly would i invite herr to my place in this situation? Or suggest she invites me to hers? And when would i do this and how without looking like a creep?
Also, i have no (little) money so how can i get around this for now without her catching on and us having a good time?
Find some sort of free, open-air event in your area and go to that. Something like a street festival, farmer’s market, or maybe a fun part of town to just browse the shops. You guys can walk around and talk about each other or the things around you.
I think it’s a little early for either of you to go to each other’s place. There are many ways that you might not be compatible. If you’re at their house, it might get awkward. But if you’re out and about, there’s always something interesting you can see or do.
100% agreement with filmore. Neutral ground, outside event, or if no events are scheduled, find a busy park and just take a walk and chat. It’s good if things are going on around you, because if you need topics of conversation, you can draw from your surroundings.
Relax and be kind. Everyone responds well to kindness.
Agency is the ability to take action. It terms of your situation, it means that you should show decisiveness, confidence, and commitment to your choices.
Hanging out is fine. To ask her to hang out, send her a message (or a phone call, if you’re old fashioned) asking her if she wants to hang out. If she agrees, aggressively push for a specific time and date.
If you don’t have money, you’ll have to offer her something else. Either you have to exhibit a winning personality, be physically attractive, or do enjoyable things with her (like the aforementioned street fair). If you don’t have a car and live with your parents, dating will be difficult. You shouldn’t try to hide your lack of wealth but rather compensate for it by being a high-quality person in other ways.
As your discussing things come up with an appealing reason to have her come to your place.
“You like 80s music I have an awesome 80s Youtube mix!”
or
“You wanna see some art I have a couple of my own works I can show you”
…blah blah blah
Although, my general advice is that you’re not getting laid tonight unless there is drinking going on and she lowers her inhibitions. Just play it cool and be engaging. First dates are hard enough without having it in your head that pussy is necessary.
Serious question: have you ever had a relationship? I’m not asking if you’ve had sex or made out with girls. Nor am I asking about friends with benefits. I’m asking about a sustained intimate relationship with someone you cared about and who cared about you.
Because if you have or have not, my advice would be different in either case.
I think you should start out with discussing your desire to get rich quick, and then follow it up with your seed spreading theory. It won’t do you much good, but it’ll save her time.
