new from Ronco! “Spray on Merkins”
The ones I love are:
“We had this poor guy come in, and he hadn’t had a date in years. But after our patented hair removal system got rid of that unsightly BACK HAIR he’s busy every night!”
I never knew that women were so repulsed by back hair. Especially since most guys I know keep their shirts on when asking women for dates.
what? you mean some people don’t have their shirts off when they ask people on dates?
more fools they!
Sex in a Bottle is great!
Just make sure you check the vintage before you buy it.
This hair is your hair, this hair is my hair
its from ronco, its really nice hair
from a can now, in different shades now
this hair is made for you and me
Liar, that kind of joy only omes in cans.
but I love that screen saver…how can I have great sex in a bottle on my screen at work? and does it go boing boing boing?
Three inches? That’s not a topical cream, that’s a tube of modeling clay.
That ad is HORRIBLE! The whole time I’m thinking, “If she’s that shallow, you probably ought to throw her to the curb right now!”
“Will she still feel the same if you’re bald?”
“Sure she will. She’ll just feel it about someone else.”
Bleah.
Is this even legal? who has that little to do with their life, that they just get this program and investigate random people? Say it with me now, “Completely bugshit psycho LOSER!” See also: cyberstalker, peeping Tom, and restrainig order.
I cannot wrap my brain around the concept of wanting to find out so much at any one time. I know that there are legitimate needs for this sort of information but, to just have? For no reason at all?? This sort of thing makes baby Jesus cry.
“You should see what she can do with seven milk bottles and a tuning fork!”
Come in cans? What is this, a new soft drink?
“Try new Jizm[sup]tm[/sup] – the soda with spunk!”
Now that’s just bad! Inventive? Yes.
And what song do you think is going to be stuck in my head tonight at work? This is bad! I have a 12 hour shift comming up from 3pm to 3am and this is what I have to look forward to?
Oh yes my friend, you will pay for this.
Zette when I first saw that commercial I thought what a shallow bitch. And I laughed. It’s sad really.
If she is that upset over hair loss gods forbid he get in a disfiguring accident!
No, that’s okay! It just says, “Best before 1987.”
Is this similar to Zebra’s sex pheromones?
Well, this proposition interests me more than somewhat, and I insert the item into a party who is called Google, and Google comes up with several statistics, and he says to me as follows:
'Why, there are 142 cites for Great Sex In A Bottle, if that is what you wish, and who can say this is wrong.
Also, if you do not wish your sex to be great, in the matter of bottles anyway, I have 1090 items of Sex In A Bottle, which by no means promise greatness, or at least the greatness does not feature on the label.
Furthermore, in the matter of Super Sex In A Bottle, I make the total 43 sources, and I am wondering why super is considered greater than great, by a factor of 3, or maybe more.
I am such a guy who is a search engine, and I am just around, and various parties wish my opinion on this, and that, and I am happy to give my opinion, for what that is worth.
Now, many of these citizens are fond of requesting details of orgasms, and how these orgasms are obtained, and one thing and another, and it is a surprise to me how little these citizens know of orgasms, for they are a source of no little curiosity around these parts.
So I put Orgasm In A Bottle into myself, and I come up with 273, and I compare this number with Great Sex In A Bottle, which is 142, and I am surprised to see that it is possible to obtain such orgasms without having sex, even with a bottle.
Well, since I am alone around here, and doing not much at this time, I check on Masturbation In A Bottle, and I observe 24 references to this much underrated activity, and if you will excuse me, I am going offline for a spell, as I am busy with a spot of research, and this research is of a most private nature, so no peeping, if you do not mind.’
Cool. I wonder what I would look like if I was 6’6".
OK. Some one’s got some 'splainin to do.
I have 2 emails - one upon which I get absolutely every single piece of spam immaginable. The other rarely gets it.
I just got this bulk mailing of ‘Sex in a Bottle’ on my ‘rarely get spam’ address. Note please:
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This thread.
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The OP is Fenris
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And just whom do you think has this email addy, Hmmmmmm???
:: annoyed tapping foot ::
(no, I don’t really believe that you had anything to do with it. but if you DO have an explanation, we’d be happy to hear it Fen-cy )
Thank you to xcheopis for my new sig line,
“Great sex in a bottle, Viagra-Man! They’re pouring Hot Liquid FuckTM into the water supply!”