Hi Zoe, thanks for the response.
I do not know if she is getting that counseling or not. I don’t know if she followed through or when push came to shove decided to avoid it. I believe she was sincere about pursuing it at the time but really - it could have just been a placating comment to me.
It is funny, in a kind of painful way, when she told me a big part of her issue was a fear of being financially and emotionally dependent upon someone else. I pointed out to her two things…
1.) Financially - I make very good money. She also makes very good money, not quite as much but much more than the average. We did not live together and we did not have any reason to co-mingle finances. I certainly was not going to be in need of a loan from her nor require her financial assistance and she knew that. Granted, we also never talked about marriage or moving in together and if those conversations would have occurred how to manage finances would have been a part of that discussion. Kind of normal relationshp stuff, huh?
2.) Emotionally - What attracted her to me was that she was an independent woman whose happiness was not dependent upon a relationship or a “man”. In fact if it was otherwise, I would probably not have continued to date her as that is a big no-no for me. Likewise, I have my own life and interests and I enjoyed sharing those with her.
So anyway, that was part of the bitter-sweet about finally finding out some of the issues behind her actions when it was to late to really talk about them and address them within our relationship.