Submitted for your approval, the most awesome movie review ever written. 
For more: Neill Cumpston's Written The Only GRINDHOUSE Review You Ever Need To Read!!
I know this movie(s?) is going to be filled with gore, pointless sexuality, and violence.
I wanna see it!
Gods help me.
Oh yeah, is it just me or does Quentin Tarantino look like Shaggy?
That is awesome.
They plan to release this in Holland as well.
As two separate movies.
[insert pitworthy language here]
Joe Bob Briggs must be creaming his jeans over this movie. Are there still any drive-ins left in America?
Geez, I am so excited for this movie. Rose McGowan with a gun for a leg… that’s pretty damn hot.
They’re making a comeback. The one in my hometown that showed “adult movies” when I was a kid was recently rescued from flea market status and renovated. I saw “Superman Returns” there.
I’ll withhold judgment on the film and the veracity of the review in question, but these excerpts were fun:
The title of one of the movies, Death Proof, is because this guy’s car is “death proof.”
I love Neil Cumpston’s reviews. They’re sometimes more entertaining than the movies themselves. Grindhouse has been on my radar for a long time and I can’t wait to see it.
I read that review the other day and laughed till I cried. The review seems to have a similar tone to the film itself, which I can’t wait to see.
Pravnik, where in Texas are you (and that drive-in)?
Marchant-Ivory move over! There’s a NEW team in tinseltown producing classic cinema, and the name is Tarantino-Rodriguez!
It’s even on Rotten Tomatoes
I hate Tarantino and Rodriguez, so this movie’s certainly nothing I want to be anything near, and judging from the review I wouldn’t like it even if it wasn’t by those two hacks, but I nevertheless did find his writing style entertainingly stupid.
Dunno, but there’s a great drive in just west of Toronto in Oakville, the “5 Drive In,” which despite the name has three screens, not five. It would so be worth it.
“Like, his director skills are so stripper-with-chainsaw good they make you grow asses on other parts of your body that he then kicks. I hope he directs more movies. I would see them, burn down the theater, and then call the fire department so I could tell all the fireman about what a kick-ass movie it was. When they started to attack me with axes, I’d fly away because Quentin’s movie would have given me ninja flight.”
I am dying over this.
Probably because of Dundas St. (Hwy 5).
And that’s where I’m going to see it.
As awesome as that review it doesn’t make me want to see the movie any more…
BECAUSE IT’S NOT POSSIBLE. My desire to see Grindhouse is like the speed of light, impossible to exceed. Damn, it’s like they wrote that movie with me in mind.
This will probably be the only movie we go to the show to see this year. I can’t wait!
According to sources (intenet rumours), Neill is actually a pseudonym for Patton Oswalt, one of the funniest comedians working today.
Whomever it is, they are the best film reviews around. He describe The 300 as “…a film that will give your eyeballs boners!”
heh.
Man, I love Patton Oswalt, I have to check these reviews out!