Well, also if you go to snpp.com and read the episode capsules, for fun. Not…not that I do that!! <looks around>
I don’t know Max Torque’s line, but I’m going to add one of my own anyway.
“It’s because they’re stupid, that’s why. That’s why everybody does everything.”
My contribution:
“Profoundly pressing power plant profit projections for Pete Porter in Pasadena”
—“Priority?”
“Precisely”
That’s from the opening of “Who Shot Mr. Burns, Part I”. Smithers is one of the speakers, and some random plant worker is the other.
My turn:
“You know, the problem here was water leakage.”
That’s easy! It’s from “Who Shot Mr.Burns: Part 1”!
How about:
"Don’t say, “Revenge.” Don’t say, “Revenge.”
“Revenge!”
“That’s it, I’m outta here.”
<Footsteps running away. Door slams closed.>
Water leakage- I think when the house tilts, and Marge gets a job at the Power Plant.
Revenge- when Homer and Bart each get a new father/son to get back at the other, Bart for Homer’s bad parenting, and Homer b/c of “revenge.”
My contribution:
“Oh, look. Charlie Brown said ‘Good Grief.’ Who saw that coming”?
“Oh, look. Charlie Brown said ‘Good Grief.’ Who saw that coming”?
Bart in the episode with the French Waiter and Mayor Quimby’s nephew (“chowder”), he’s trying to change the subject.
“Grace, c’mere! There’s a sinister-looking kid I want you to see.”
That’s the ep where Bart break’s his leg and, with nothing to do, starts peering out his telescope into various houses in Springfield (ala Rear Window which is why the man who says this sounds like Jimmy Stewart).
“I have mustard?”
That’s Otto, reacting in surprise to what his landlord says he found in Otto’s apartment while carrying out an eviction order. Otto then moved into the Simpson’s garage, and all this while Bart was trying to learn the electric guitar.
Actually, I think the line was “I had mustard?”
Try this:
“It’s a pornography store. I was buying pornography.”
Otto when he gets kicked out of his apartment after losing his job. He gets back his bus license by telling Patty and Selma Homer’s a jackass
“Hey, this is Richard Nixon’s enemies list!”
Barney to Moe, in the Frank Grimes episode. Homer is dismayed that he has an enemy, and Moe says he has lots of them, but his list is just Richard Nixon’s with Nixon’s name crossed out.
How about…
“I shall send you to heaven before I send you to hell.”
Sideshow Bob, in the Cape Fear parody, about to sing the score of HMS Pinafore.
Try:
“I puke. The end.”
That was the Baysitter bandit episode, while Bart was being tortured by the Little Elves show.
How 'bout this?
“…and the driver has been instructed to ignore all stop signs and crosswalks.”
The Mr. Plow episode. Homer was explaining what kind of place Moe’s was to an insurance agent, but didn’t want to admit it was a bar.
“Forgiveness, please!”
The short Yakuza guy after he crashes through the window in the episode where Marge (assisted by the mob), opens a pretzel business.
A few easy ones:
“Linglo is dead.”
“And I never got my comeuppance.”
“And now Bob Dole will read from the Necronomicon.”
Okay, Menocchio, I don’t know your last two, but the first is from the “Homer’s Day/Bart’s Day/Lisa’s Day” epidode. Those were the haunting last words of Linguo, the grammar robot.
Here’s one:
“I - I think I swallowed a toothpick!”
The third is from the episode where acid rain tears through everything because the Republicans decided to make more lax environmental regulations. Dole reads from the Necronomicon during their meeting (so that’s what they do behind those “members only” doors!).
To prevent mayhem I’ll defer to Minor Irritant for the next quote.
“I swallowed a toothpick” line- Ned Flanders in the episode where Reverend Lovejoy is usurped by Marge. He’s detailing how exposure to Ned has made him cynical and jaded.
Easy one:
“Chang-Ho is over there. I am Chin-Ho.”
“Whoever you are, kid, just pass it along!”
The “comeuppance” quote is when Homer becomes a food critic. (Hey, did you hear? Homer’s a critic!)
I know where the Chin-Ho quote is from, but I don’t remember the rest of the episode. I do know Fyvush Finkel is involved.
I think these are the unanswered quotes:
“When you think about it, mud is nothing but wet dirt.”
“It’s because they’re stupid, that’s why. That’s why everybody does everything.”
“…and the driver has been instructed to ignore all stop signs and crosswalks.”