habanero pepper juice and condoms

Would this really work?
Not that I am planning on doing it, just curious.

So this woman suspects her husband is cheating on her. She found an open box of condoms in his car. So she pokes a hole in each of the wrappers and then soaks them in some habanero pepper juice for an hour then replaces them in the box.
A while later her husband goes out to help his mother with some chores. A few hours later her best friend calls her complaining of burning down there after having sex with her boyfriend. Hours later her husband comes home and is in need of an icepack.

It’s a nice thought and funny to read, we all like to read these little revenge stories.
Wouldn’t someone notice a smell, or the wrapper burning their fingers or the condom burning before he even got it on? Would the juice melt the condom, or make it sticky?

I don’t think you would necessarily need to put enough there to notice a smell. Certainly being a gentleman I know that if I’ve handled hot enough chillis and then just touch my penis going to the toilet the effect is immediate.

Incidentally because of that effectiveness I would say that the idea that BOTH of them would have felt something is implausible. You would notice within a second of the condom going on.

I think most any man who regularly uses condoms would notice a hole in the packaging. If you squeeze the condom wrapper and it doesn’t feel right you throw it out.

Erm, really? I don’t think I’ve ever felt one with blowen up packaging like you would get for a packet of crips or something…

Like Simple Linctus, I can say with certainty that any habanero juice on the condom would be felt instantly. My wife would also agree that any handling of “good bits” by contaminated digits would transfer said juice with even more effect. :eek:

Milk can help (but not totally resolve) said issues, if one was to encounter them.

My bigger question would be given a pinhole in the wrapper, would any of the juice make it inside to contaminate the interior contents.

Sounds like a load of bull. Who would call up a friend to complain about your burning oonie? And what husband would be stupid enough to let his wife know that whatever he did today has resulted in the need for an ice pack on the crotch?

True Story:

I was once chopping habaneros for pepper jam (with blueberries). I wore latex gloves while doing this. When I got to a stopping point, I decided to go use the restroom. When I got in there, I realized I needed to change out my tampon. Mind you, I had taken the gloves off and washed my hands thoroughly. I used OB tampons – no applicator.


Lesson Learned:
• When working with hot peppers and needing a change of tampon, put on CLEAN gloves first.

•Hot pepper juice can and will break down latex. Because it soaked right through my gloves and still got on my fingers.

Also, it seems like an excessively nasty trick. If the pepper juice wasn’t smelled immediately, then you’d feel the burn on your fingers before you even got the condom out of the wrapper. And it might break while being put on because, as I said, pepper juice breaks down latex.

I think you’d want something that’s slow-acting.

The thing is, if you find your hub has condoms, and doesn’t use them with you … isn’t he busted already? And if he does use them with you, mightn’t this trick backfire?

So, even if it worked, I think the practical applications are limited. It’s probably a scene in some movie, though.

My true story, not as amusing as Dogzillas: for a party I made nachos, only I’d bought Habaneros rather than Jalapenos. They were out of Jalapenos, and I figured, what’s the difference? I learned the difference! My fingers burnt after cutting & placing the peppers, and the tray of nachos, which would normally disappear in a flash, was only half gone at the end of the party. My eyes hurt, too! Thank goodness I don’t pee often.

I don’t think you would. For instance, you yourself did not feel the burn on your fingers after it had soaked through your gloves, you had manipulated a tampon out of its wrapper, gotten your clothing situated, and applied your tampon. There’s far less work involved in putting on a condom.

Not to mention, IF you managed to get the habanero juice into the wrapper through a pinhole, the thing would never dry out again with just a pinhole for air circulation.

I’m pretty sure that someone would notice a damp, sticky condom when they took it out of the wrapper.

What sort of horrible dry condoms have you had experience with? :eek:

I thought you could buy dry ones that you had to apply lube and spermicide to seperately? Never seen them myself…

I guess you *could *- but I think he’d notice a brand new kind of condom WAY before even opening it up.

Really depends on your level of sensitivity. I chop habaneros and hotter peppers regularly without ever wearing gloves, and I don’t really notice any skin irritation. If there is any, it’s usually on an unusual spot on my hand or arm, and it takes a while before I can feel it.

And, yes, I’ve touched my dick or balls countless times after having thought I’ve cleaned up my fingers well enough (or just not bothering to wash my hands afterwards). Yeah, it’s not fun, but it’s not that bad. The worst was contacts. I had washed my hands several times in soap and water after chopping up a batch of Thai chiles, and I still managed to have some residue when I removed my contacts. My eye reflexively snapped shut, so now I had a contact with chile oil on it stubbornly refusing to come out of my eye. That really did suck.

Since the OP has been answered, I offer up an old thread: Goddammit holy shit a jalapeño burned my dick - The BBQ Pit - Straight Dope Message Board

They had them in, of all places, my old university department stockroom. I assume somebody was using them to wrap up parts, maybe to keep them watertight. They were packaged dry, with powder (talcum? lycopodium?Something) that kep it from sticking to itself, but wasn’t irritating.

LOL, ok, poor phrasing. I just suspect you’d notice something … different.

I’d expect you’d notice the pepper juice as soon as you opened the wrapper - it’s not a clear substance and it has a sharp smell as well. Maybe if there was only a little bit of it on the condom, but how would you control that apart from a hypodermic needle? Sounds like a revenge fantasy and nothing more.

I’m an uncouth slob. So you’re saying I can drain the snake painlessly?

A friend of mine said, upon having essentially the same experience as Dogzilla: “It felt really good…for a few seconds.”

Another friend (oh, all right, it was me) once self-pleasured using toothpaste as a lubricant. Again, it felt quite good…for a few seconds…then hurt pretty badly.

(Ah, youth! Except…)