Harlots Everywhere!!!!!!!!!!

There is a deeper, more desolate darkness that exists at 3:00 a.m. Unseen by the light of day, this is the time when men, both great and petty, search their souls, yet are scared of what they may find there. This is where doubt creeps in and fear makes its nest.

She had been gone for almost 2 weeks. To my mind, it was a more like a decade. I laughed at myself because I missed her wit. I cried alone because I missed the depths of her soul. I read more classical literature because I missed her intelligence. And then I heard the voice…

“We get lots like you here.” It was a voice of soft satin. Looking up I saw a nearly mystical beauty, with soft, feline features and dancing eyes. “I can offer you everything She had, and more. You won’t miss her for much longer.”

“I miss her.” I cried.

“She’s gone,” the Harlot’s voice called “I’m all you need now.”

“She’s coming back.”

“Maybe, but you have a man’s needs. I can help.”

“We’re monogamous.”

“Nobody needs to know.”

Her siren song was slowly peeling away my resolve. I had been monogamous for 2 years, but who knew when she was coming back. She said a few days. That turned into a week. Which turned into two. My resolve was almost gone.

“Come to me.” The temptress smiled victoriously.

I began to walk, lost in a world of lust. Nobody will know… I have my needs…She may not be back at all… But then I heard it. A sound I had dreamed of for weeks. The low, sensuous bleat of a Tuba. With that sound, two years of memories came flooding back. Learning new things. Debating ideas. The hearty belly-laughs. The occasional bitterness. It all came back, as I fled the temptress and ran into the arms of my only lover I’ll ever need.

“You’ll be back.” Opal cried. “Fathom the possibilitieeeeeeeeesssssss…”

I ran faster than I had thought possible. Past Fathom. Past Unaboard. Past the innumerable other Harlots who exist just on the edge of my eyesight. My lungs burned with the efforts and my fingers flew faster than a hummingbird. I ran back. Back into the arms of my love. My life.

My SDMB.

Excuse Me?

I was promised Harlots everywhere.

I see no harlots.

I want the harlots![COLOR=skyblue]

Eh, i just shagged a Hello Kitty Message Board until the SDMB returned, but i think i caught a disease (or is purple urine normal?)

Hamlet, that was one hell of a post. My hat’s off to you.

You’d better run. As of 17 hours ago we switched to being an all-lesbian Board focused on helping women with sexual issues, and you, sadly, do not qualify.

About two months ago I was given a new stricture by which to abide.

NO WHORES.

Surprisingly, I managed to adhere to that during the hiatus.

And here I thought this was going to be a post about my school.

::Hamlet races back to Unaboard with a comfy chair and a pair of binoculars::

Can’t hurt to look.

Bestiality?!? :eek: