*…honest to God not all that interested in your boobs, or boobs in general for that matter. I mean, when you think about it, your boobs aren’t much more than hanging sacks of fat with tissue for producing milk. While breasts are to some degree inherantly desirable, most of the western world’s fixation on them is caused by sociatal conditioning which teaches us that… (nametag 1 of 7)
*doing your job in India
*his friend Jesus
*a crazy psycho
*vuliercangobe desamriuxus
*born to be wild
*light of the world
*not a crazy psycho, honest!
*Darkwing Duck
*in ketosis
*Tycho (“Brahe”, not “from Penny Arcade”)
*Tycho (“from Penny Arcade”, not “Brahe”)
*sexually fixated on your spleen
[ul]
[li]99-144/100% pure[/li][li]It’s me[/li][li]Hi, Opal![/li][/ul]
(Note: Bonus points if anyone gets the reference in the second item. Hint: There is no “I am” in front of it.)
Robin
[ul]
[li]Telling you now.[/li][li]Telling you for the last time.[/li][li]Not Opal.[/li][li]Here.[/li][li]In the Witness Protection Plan.[/li][li]Standing right in front of you.[/li][li]Ready to learn.[/li][li]Mostly harmless.[/li][li]The one you’ve been looking for.[/li][li]Not drunk yet.[/li][/ul]
Menopausal
[ul]
[li]a problem[/li][li]discontent[/li][li]on work release[/li][li]Under Pressure[/li][li]Dangerous When Wet[/li][/ul]
[ul]
[li]Slippery when wet.[/li][/ul]
A banana!
Todd Rundgren?
And one more submission…
Hello, I am: Masturbating like a motherfuck.
Yup. I need less obvious cryptic references.
Robin
Set you up the Bomb.
[ul][li]you in ten years, poor fella[/li][li]sleepwalking my way through my life[/li][li]abusing Opal (well, ain’t I?)[/li][li]preoccupied, but being nice about it[/li][li]listening to the voices in my head[/li][li]reading your breas… NAMETAG! READING YOUR NAMETAG![/li][li]Ambiguously straight[/li][li]out of ideas[/li][li]really this corny; don’t feed me any straight lines.[/li][li]talking in buzzwords. It’s like Pentacostalism, but for business.[/li][li]on the take[/li]blissed out on life, man[/ul]
Your server tonight
Mr. Ed
Certain you forgot to zip
Subtle as a hand grenade in a bowl of oatmeal
- Britney Spears next husband
- Here today, gone tomorrow
- Still in the closet
- Hung like a bull moose
- Circumcised
- Under new management
- Shy (Did I just say that?)
- Finally sober
- On drugs
- Picturing you naked
- My brother’s keeper
- The God of hell fire
- A girl watcher
- Sailing away
- At your service
- Into Amway
- Trying to remember your name
- Selling subscriptions
- Mortified
- Your guardian angel
- Harpo (HONK)
- Glowing
- Not welcome here
Hello. I am…
A geezer, are you a geezette?
Bipolar. I’m Santa Claus’s “down under” brother.
Going to a REAL party. Wanna come?
Waiting for Godot.
Getting my loan at Ditech.
Buried in work.
Wearing my new tinfoil hat.
Drooling.
Somewhere out there.
Riding high.
An alcoholic…I’m hiding rye.
All wet.
HAR!!!
I heard this for the first time in YEARS yesterday morning on my commute to work. Now I understand why. Too funny…
:dubious:
Do people get to pick which one they wear, or go for a second try? 'cause that’d suck. Unless you’re, you know, anal.
Hrmmm. Good question. I was thinking a “Pick-a-card” type draw, but I could lay them all out on a table and let people select their own. It would be a good punishment for the fashionabley late crowd. All the good ones would be taken.
- Better than I look
- Pooping my pants
- Thinking of better days
- A nut job
- Your real father
- Sick of this shit
- On parole
- Surrounded by assholes
- Contagious
- Wired for sound
- Your daddy
- Looking to hookup
- On the FBI’s most wanted list
- Dylsicex
- A closet homophobe
- Confrontational
- Prone to be violent
- A big waste of time
- Stalking you
- Casing your house
-
not interested in small talk. Let’s just fuck like bunny rabbits, and decide if we want to get to know each other afterwards.
-
in need of a hug.
-
turned on by people wearing stickers.
-
fantasizing about you.
-
currently using a DH18"IBJD
Hello. I am…
…the walrus
…not amused
…he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
…bored.com