Help Me Name My Penis

So, it has come to my attention that someone people name their penis. Mine, as yet has no name. While I feel giving a part of your a name a little dumb, I think my penis deserves a name. It might be nice to for my penis to have a name, so I could introduce my penis to women. Now, should my penis have a “normal” name like Eddy, Homer, or Jerry? Or should my penis have a name like The Hammer or Captain One Eye? Maybe a Biblican name like Moses? I would like some suggestions for a good name for my penis. This isn’t a poll (no pun intended) I just want some suggestions.

How’s about not name it at all? Seriously, why bother? Introducing your penis by name to anyone is lame. Sure, some will find it funny, but naming your penis is as lame as knock knock jokes. Do yourself a favor, go have a drink and forget about this silly neanderthal quest of yours…

Fluffy :smiley:

The Little Liutenant

Your screen name would totally work. Self-referential irony. :wink:

Guys are allowed to name their own penii? I was informed by a male friend of mine that naming is the privilege of whomever said guy is sleeping with.

shrug The process in general doesnt make much sense to me, anyways - I mean, I’m not going to name my poonanny regardless of how fond of it I am.

What? No one’s posted the obvious? Of cours you MUST name it…

Wait for it…

Major Kong Dong. :smiley:

Minor Kong?

I agree with the person who said to use your screen name. But if you absolutely don’t want to, “Private Kong” could work. Or “Seaman Kong”.

Personally, I think my username would make a great name for my little friend. Er, did I say little? I meant gargantuan! right.

What do you think, Blinky?

Mini Me?

Tiny?

Cyclops?

Eurethra Franklin?

I’d suggest dropping the idea.

I can’t in good conscience offer any suggestions because I fear that you might actually use them. Personally, I think that if you give it a name, you might actually feel compelled to use it whilst being intimate with a female…

recalls moment when boyfriend said, “And here’s someone who wants to see you…meet…Free Willy!”

shudder

Don’t name it.

Gilligan.

Your little buddy that gets into trouble.

You should name it after a cartoon character:

Ricochet Rabbit?

Droopy Dog?

Speedy Gonzales?

Quick-Draw McGraw?

Some of these involve more self-confidence than others.

Tiny Tim

(if uncircumcised) The Hooded Stranger

The Bald Eagle

Captain Blowhard

Torpedo

Bushy Banana

OK, I was kinda joking.

But:

Did you laugh at him?

sigh

Name it, of course, Pablo.

I’d keep it simple. Jimmy (and the twins)

Or maybe Long Dong McKong?

Heywood Jablowme
Saw the name here on SDMB
somewhere tis a giggler.

Ooh how bout Lil Elvis?

:slight_smile:

And there’s me thinking Major Kong was a girl…

Henry Limpet