think i figured it out awhile ago
i’ll figure this out yet
Tools, no. Parts, yes. Cascade is great for removing veneer. Just run another (empty) cycle, and don’t let your non-car person wife catch you.
BTW, Mac is more manly than Snap-on, which is more manly than Craftsman.
For the record – I have Craftsman, and Makita, which is less manly than DeWalt – but I’m a girly girl.
Ahhhh shit, I said almost that exact thing to someone only a few days ago. :o It was relevant to the conversation, I swear! Other than that, though, it looks like I have about as little in common with a hetero male as is possible without actually being gay and female.
Anyway, I would like to add the following kitchen-oriented rules:
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The most appropriate knife* for a given task is always the largest one available.
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The default temperature to cook anything at is ‘as high as the stove will go’. It is only allowable to cook anything at sub-maximal heat if things actually start to catch on fire.
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If you ever have to wash the dishes, it is unacceptable to wear gloves, especially if the reason for doing so is to avoid damaging your skin. The water should still be as hot as possible, though.
*In this context, a knife can be any edged weapon - if a sword or machete is at hand, that’s probably your best bet.
I can’t decide if I’m a girly-man or not for wearing gloves while chopping habaneros. Can I get a judges ruling on this? It was for a big ol’ pot of green chili, and the first time I chopped a large quantity of them my hands cracked and bleed for quite some time. Still, I’m afraid a real man would have just used a bigger knife
To be a H-M (or M-M) is to see things in absolutes, black-and-whites, NO EXCEPTIONS. Men are about conflict and dominance first, and only then about resolution and sharing.
…unless said restaurant is Hooters. But we only go there because they have great wings… 
Man TV channels: ESPN, History Channel, Comedy Central, Discovery Channel, Spike TV
Rule #617:
Two men urinating simultaneously shall NOT aim at the same target unless they are attempting to put out a fire, or drown a ferocious animal. Re-enacting light saber battles while peeing may be acceptable in cases of extreme drunkenness.
All men know that you gotta protect Big Jim and the Twins, even if doing so seems a little un-HM. And habanero juice does not wash off.
It’s more un-manly to be seen doing the burning peepee dance.
I move to amend this one. When an H-M is playing pool on a challenge table against a gorgeous woman (not his date,) other H-Ms might offer to bribe him to lose, so they can continue to watch the woman bend over to make a shot. An H-M can honorably take the bribe and lose. It is even more manly to refuse the bribe and throw the game anyway. 
Even if a losing pool player sank only one ball, the winning H-M must shake the loser’s hand and say, “Nice game.” 
I once knew a rambling hardcore biker named Moose, rest his soul. He had the requisite Harley trademark tattoo, and a few crossed-out girlfriends’ names. He also had a spectacular, multicolored bird tattooed on one upper arm. I saw it one day when he wore a tank-top. I asked if it was a parrot. “No,” he laughed, “it’s my ten-inch cock!”
There are rules of cleavage conduct.
Ch 11, para. 82 ss. 14 a-d
*Any action of any hetero man can be justified if said to be under the influenece of cleavage (car accidents, burning chops on BBQ, cutting off own thumb with hedge trimmer etc.)
*It is the solemn duty of any hetero man observing cleavage to notify any other hetero men in the vicintity of the visiblity of cleavage in such a manner that does not arouse the awareness of the cleavage provider
*All cleavage must be ranked and graded after inspection
*cleavage inspection is the right, perogative and an essential part of the raison d’ete of any hetero man and no truly hetero man should be dissuaded from partaking in it, even by the iciest and most hostile looks from your current inamorata.
mm
mmmm… cleavage…
What were we talking about again?
THUNK
AgghhPecoDeFekaĵoDamnindeOgDammitIHit My^%$##*&BrokenHandAgain!
They didn’t wear pink. They wore “light red”.
No H-M uses those bread clips that come with loaves of bread. They spin the bag around and tuck the loose end under.
Real H-Ms recognize two types of bread: white and brown. Any brown bread which contains little bits of seeds or long fancy names are eaten only under duress. Rye bread and white Wonderbread are the only acceptable HM breads.
Rye bread, by definition, contains rye seeds.
Anyone who uses words like inamorata and raison d’ete, I gotta question his ability to post on this thread. (I’m just sayin’, you know)
Sgt Schwartz
From Married . . . with Children,
The Nine Commandments of Real Men
- It’s okay to call hooters “knockers” and sometimes “snack trays.”
- It is wrong to be French.
- It’s okay to put all bad people in a giant meat grinder.
- Lawyers: see rule three.
- It is okay to drive a gas guzzler if it helps you get babes.
- Everyone should car pool but me.
- Bring back the word “stewardesses”
- Synchronized Swimming is not a sport.
- Mudwrestling is a sport.
Another: a true true H-M is disappointed if a wound does not result in a visible scar.