Scissors. I kid you not, I must have 20 pairs, because I’m always buying them at Dollar Tree in groups of 2-3 pairs at a time. Can I ever find a pair when I need them? NO.:smack: I have pairs for the kitchen (brown handles), pairs for the bathroom (blue handles), pairs for the spare bedroom (pink handles), pairs for the patio–you know, for opening bags of bird seed and such (orange handles). None of them are ever where they’re supposed to be!
The secret to keeping your cat from hiding at bedtime is to feed them at bedtime. Works like a charm. You put the food in the bowls, cat runs in, you close the door out of the living room.
Yeah, my cat leaves me alone if I feed her at bedtime, but then she poops on the floor. I can’t figure out why the little ingrate would reward me like that. Her training program leaves something to be desired if she’s trying to teach me to feed her at night. (or maybe it’s an advanced study re: negative feedback?)
The teaspoons go missing. I should have 12, but the actual number will vary between 7 and 10 if all that I can find are clean. On the other hand, my goddam forks are reproducing so fast that they’re overflowing their compartment.
The socks, my god the socks. Sometimes there will be missing mates that reappear after months-long absences. Where the hell were they? By then I’ve usually pitched the other sock. My daughter attributes missing items to being probed by aliens. How much info can you get from probing a sock?
Superglue, cellophane tape, shipping tape, tweezers and nail clippers have each shown up in various potted plants.
Won’t work for me. Rex is chronically underweight and so he’s free-fed 24/7, as per the vet’s orders.
Missing: Kipling, the Steiff bear. His big brother, Dickens, and his rabbit friend, Poe, miss him very much, as do I. How do you lose a teddy bear? I think he fell in the wastebasket and got thrown away. 
Here’s how me and daHubby keep our socks together:
OK, I cannot figure out how to do the multi-quote button…
This one is sad. I would be quite sad if I lost my teddy.
maggenpye This:
was hysterical. 
We are entering mitten season. #2 son wanted a $12 pair of gloves. I ixnayed that in favor of a $4 pair. Why? Because I know that pair won’t make through the winter between buses, school, band practice, friend’s houses, church…
I’m actually the sole cause of nearly all missing items, wherever I am.
Sunday, I put up a whiteboard in my bedroom to track my budget. In the course of doing so, I lost two drywall screws, one nail, a Phillips’ screwdriver, a box of markers, and the little sanity I retained. All this in a room that’s maybe 10 foot by 12 foot, and my brother was sitting right there, watching all the fun.
The absolute worst thing I can do is think to myself “ah, this is important. I should put it someplace safe.” Because wherever I chose, it will be safe. As safe as King Tut’s funereal goods, unseen by the human eye for close to three thousand years.
I’ve “lost” an earring that I just happened to be holding in my left hand. I’ve lost glasses that I tucked into my shirt. I’ve lost shoes that were on the floor two feet behind me. Mind you, I can keep track of other people’s stuff without a problem, but when it comes to my own? Hopeless.
While there are definitely downsides to being a poster child for ADD, at least it means my world is constantly new and surprising.
I used to have a mystery.
The scene: 1995. I was to be a bridesmaid in my aunt’s wedding. My mother bought me two new pair of pantyhose for the occasion, passing on the sage wisdom to always have a spare pair in the event of runs. I put them in my lingerie drawer.
Cut to the day of the wedding: The pantyhose are nowhere to be found! After a rushed trip to the store, all was well in the universe again - I would be a properly hosed bridesmaid. (the dresses were electric blue, off-shoulder, with a slit up one leg to mid thigh and there were shoes dyed to match; no butt bows thankfully)
The groomsman assigned to me flirted with me, and I with him, but not too much as I had a date and it would have been rude. We did have a running joke about the discomfort about the shoes all evening, though.
Fast forward to 1999: That groomsman and I are newly wed and moving into our first apartment together. I bring the dresser from my parent’s house. To make lugging it upstairs easier, we take out the drawers.
Out fall two brand-new-in-package 4yr old pair of pantyhose from under the drawer.
Now when socks or underwear go missing, I pull the dresser drawers out. But I never did fine one of my hand-knit socks that went missing.
In reply to the OP-has my brother house sat for you recently? Years ago, he started hiding silverware whenever he would stay overnight at the home of a friend or family member. The tradition, of course, spread throughout the land.
Check your shoes, it’s one of his favorite spots!
I lost a suitcase. A big rolling one, slightly larger than the ones you stuff in the overhead bin. It just bothers me that the only time it would ever have been out of the house was if I were traveling somewhere and the suitcase would be full of, you know, stuff. No missing stuff - just a missing stuff holder. 
I had it when we moved in. Gone when we moved out 2 years later.
I also lost a pair of pants when I lived alone. I went through every nook and cranny of my apartment. I finally gave up and put something else on and went out. When I came home, the pants were lying there in the middle of the floor.
I blame the government.
Thank you very much.
I’m right with you on the gloves and mittens. **Maggenkid **spent this winter losing four pairs of gloves, two of her own and two of mine. Luckily, the three pairs of gloves we lost the year before last have all turned up again!
Down to four forks now (three dinner and one salad, for those of you keeping score at home). I have no idea what happened to the fifth one; I did a cursury check of the kitchen trash can - as much as I was able to, considering what was in there. :eek:
I think I’m going to hit the thrift store later this week and stock up on forks before they’re all gone. And interrogate the cats.
For complicated reasons, my mom was in charge of PAPER plane tickets for a vacation we took with six of their friends. A few days before we departed there was a problem with one of them, so she took it out for the phone call.
It vanished. This was a first class plane ticket to Europe. A paper one. Even a replacement is a fortune. We looked all over the bedroom, where we knew it had not left. I looked, my dad looked, and four of my mother’s friends looked. My mother drove herself absolutely crazy. We ended up having to pay the replacement.
We got home from Europe and it was RIGHT THERE on the nightstand. I swear to god I went through the papers on that nightstand at least ten times, more like twenty. We knew what it looked like - had the others for comparison. We did eventually get our money back, but where the hell had it been?
I just lost two checks a couple of weeks ago. One was for $10.00, made out to me; a refund of the security deposit of the storage unit I vacated at the end of July, the other, made out to hubby for $50.00 in spiff money from his job. I have looked through every paper pile in the house at least three times, but they seem to have gone forever. Not a huge amount, but still. :mad:
Just today, a co-worker had borrowed my scissors to open up a new storage cabinet for the bookkeeper, who was working from home today. I wander in, and ask if the scissors on top of the file cabinet are mine as I pick them up. She answers in the affirmative, but says she still needs them to open up the hardware bags for the new cabinet. I set them down on the desk right behind her so she can reach them more easily, and return to my own desk in the next room. Within about a minute, she asks me where the scissors are. I tell her to look right behind her on the desk. They aren’t there. They aren’t on the floor, on top of any thing else; they’re not in my pockets or on my desk.
I think there’s a portal to another dimension in the bookkeeper’s office.
If we extrapolate that to bookkeepers in general it would explain a lot…
Ah yes, the mittens. I just buy gloves as a habit now whenever I find a pair I like, because I know at some point during the winter I’ll be missing either one of my gloves or both. And no, they aren’t usually $12 gloves, either. 
The $50 rebate check from Sprint for my husband’s new phone. I remember picking it up, thinking I needed to get it into the bank. From there it vanished into the ether, apparently. We’ve both searched everywhere.
Huh. I lose forks, too. I thought it was just me. I can never keep track of those darned things.
We lost our pizza cutter, but I can guess how that happened - order pizza, it’s not cut well enough, got out the cutter, threw it out with the box. (Thought it was pizza bones probably.)
I have learned to keep gloves safe, because last year my SO’s mother bought me a pair of $75 leather gloves. (She found them on sale, and used coupons and stuff, and ended up paying only like $16, which is awesome.) But the fact remains that they are enormously expensive and nice gloves and I don’t want to lose them so I’ve gotten anal about keeping track of them. I used to lose them all of the time, too.
Scissors too. I can never find scissors, and I have 20 pairs too.
My sister lost her pearl stud earrings, but eventually found them again. She had had two aspirin in one hand, and her pearl earrings in the other. She got confused.:rolleyes: