Mascot: Ass
Vehicle: Abrams tank (Conventionally powered)
Weapon of choice: M-16
Third and ten: Punt, fall back, regroup
Navy
Mascot: Billy the Goat ™
Vehicle: Aircraft Carrier and 90+ warplanes (nuclear powered)
Weapon of choice: Sidewinder missile
Third and ten: Smart bomb to the open tight end (Failing that: Nuke 'em all and let Satan sort 'em out)
Off-topic, and more of a MPSIMS query, really, but how did the Navy end up choosing a goat for mascot? Wouldn’t something vaguely nautical, or at least coastal, be a more appropriate choice?
Oh, pooh. I’ll just PUT it in Pit terms.
ChiefScott, who the fuck picked a goddamned GOAT as mascot? John Paul Fucking Jones? Is it because all you swabbies like to SCREW GOATS? The fucking Army, man, we KNOW they fuck that mule!
Your enthusiasm is catching, andros! But misdirected!
The Navy’s comprised of a bunch of “seamen” who spend all their time crammed into tight “bunks” with each other wearing little “caps” and “knickers” isolated with their fellow “shipmen” for months at a time in “phallic-looking” vessels singing “bad” songs and “comforting” each other.
Sure, some guys in the Army like to paint their faces with green and black makeup and wear camo undies, and those foxholes are kind of intimate, and maybe they wear too much decoration on their uniforms, and some guys get thoughts into their heads confimed in a tank with nothing but green socks and dog tags on, but. . .Uhm, what I’m trying to say is that Army Rules, and if you got your dick out of that damn goat, you’d think clearly and agree with me.
Satan, I think the whole point here is the Fun of Rivalries, not necessarily the organizations involved.
If Saddam were to drop a big bomb onto ChiefScott’s boat, you can bet the United States Army would be ready, willing, and able to wade out there and extend a helping hand.
That being said, who d’ya like in the Harvard-Yale game?
When Army wins, I’ll simply and graciously accept your humble acknowledgement that grown men shouldn’t dress up in outfits more appropriately suited for toddlerwear.
As my Leading Cheif point out today at work, it is kind of silly for us enlisted folks to get all hepped up about a contest between the two main officer schools. This was in response to a contingent of Army students (all junior enlisted) from DLI (across town) marching onto the Navy base and making a bunch of noise about the merits of the Army officer producing school.