I’m getting really tired of meeting people out at bars and random forced social events. Just please tell me that some people met their SO without having to meet at these things. I am more of a quiet person, and unfortunately am hopelessly clueless at being the life of the party. I’m just interested in some stories.
I hope to meet someone in a venue where I feel comfortable in, like performing music or rehearsing with a community band. I’ve learned trying with people at work creates too much drama for my tastes. I’ve had bad experiences with it this year.
I put an ad in the local music paper. This paper now has thousands of “M seeks F” ads, but at the time it had only a tiny section of half a dozen ads, most bands looking for players. Mine said:
Kate Bush fan with records/videos
looking to meet other fans to buy/trade.
…and my address. She wrote me, we met in person at a record store, she visited me to watch my videos (this was in 1983 and VCRs weren’t that common), we hit it off and have been together ever since.
I have to admit, I don’t believe this advice has wide applicability to anyone else.
He was a neighbor. After his wife left him he would often sit outside around the time I would stumble home from the library. I’d stop to talk. There were many things I was interested in that he also enjoyed speculating on.
After ~6 months his wife contacted him wishing to come back.
Ascertaining her location he immediately filed for divorce.
Within weeks we had a date and have never been apart since.
It’s been 5 years and I’ve never been happier.
For me, the fundamental change in how my wife and I started our relationship wasn’t how we met, it was how the whole process started and matured. We became friends and everything else just flowed from that; without being able to really explain it, all I can say is that everything with our relationship was just so much easier than anything that I had experienced before.
Another college (small residential college in a small town.) We met when she asked me for help with the intro physics homework. We were friends for the next three years (intro physics was normally a second-year course.) Never saw each other after graduation (two different states and 2,000 miles) until she called me up about 2.5 years later. She had apparently spent quite some time trying to actually get in touch with me–she finally had to go through my parents since I never used my landline and never checked the voicemail (DSL and local calls only), keeping the ringer off, and the only time I knew anyone called was when it’d show up with the caller ID on the TV. Plus, I almost never gave out my phone number (I was listed, but that was it.) So it turned out she had actually called my house from a phone listed under a name I didn’t recognize and going back through the history showed several calls for a few weeks.
Can’t help you, I’m afraid - met my SO in a bar. However, I picked her out because she looked like a quiet person who wanted someone to talk to, if that’s any consolation. You don’t have to be the life and soul of the party to get picked up.
I met mine online. I noticed he was online in a group that we both frequented. I’d always enjoyed his comments and quite frankly, I was bored and just thought I’d say hi. Pointed out that he and I were often online at the same time. (At the time, due to some of the info about him, I actually wasn’t sure if he were straight or gay–so I definitely wasn’t really hitting on him. He seemed fun.)
We quickly struck up a huge online friendship and dated for five years and have lived together for one.
Very happy.
(At first we started talking about books too. So, not THAT exciting to many people, believe me.)