Spike Lee filmed it best.
“it’s too hot to fuck.”
My Saturday Night Special melted before the gunfight.
“Heat, ma’am! it was so dreadful here, that I found there was nothing left for it but to take off my flesh and sit in my bones.” ~Sydney Smith
It’s so hot the flies ain’t even bitin’.
It’s so hot, this happened.
Love it!
I think the lyrics from A Horse With No Name sums it up nicely:
“The heat was hot.”
From some comedian many years ago, I can’t remember who but I’ve used the line so much I consider it mine now: it’s so hot, birds are bursting into flames in mid-air and nuns are cursing openly on the streets.
One of my favorite David Letterman “It’s so hot” jokes from many years back.
“It’s so hot, fat guys are making their own gravy!”
It’s hotter than two rats fuckin’ in a wool sock.
…the Statue of Liberty was asked to please lower her right arm.
… I tried to piss but it evaporated before it hit the ground.
… granny was breaking wind just to have a little breeze.
A local variant of that one is:
“It’s so hot, the trees are bribing the dogs.”
“…you could fry an egg on my head.”
Cole Porter beat him to it.
… Sarah Palin decided to be a Mama naked mole rat.
… even Rush believes in global warming.
… people are walking around with oven mitts instead of socks.
… the fire ants are really on fire.
Yes, I watched years of Johnny Carson.
meh, the f bomb hit my ears a little harder than “It’s too darn hot”
Plus I’ve seen Do The Right Thing, and I haven’t seen Kiss Me Kate.
As God is my witness, I thought someone would have posted it by now.
Hotter than a 4balled billy goat.
It is not hot, it just does not take me long to look at a horseshoe.
It is not hot, but is really heavy.
It is so hot that canada melted and filled in the great lakes with French pudding.
It is so hot that Al Gore landed one of his jets, sold the rest of his carbon credits and drove his caravan of suv’s north and discovered the North Pole. Yes he did! Santa said so.
Whenever we have any kind of extreme weather I always say the same thing…
“Damn you Al Gore!”