So, without being maudlin, I have a broken heart.
How do I get rid of it. Pronto? I hate moping around feeling like a boob.
All suggestions welcome. All will be considered. I will report back with any interesting results.
So - any takers?
Back in the day, I used to compare it w/ a hangover. There are two choices: tough it out or try a “hair of the dog” and get involved again. The first is hardest, but it works best in the end. The second almost always leads to disaster, for several possible reasons. Try to involve yourself in some time consuming activity, especially something physical, tough it out and remember, the opposite of love is indifference
Was it the California guy? That’s too bad, you seemed so smitten.
I don’t have any advice tho’. My method seems to be erratically bursting into tears for no reason, losing 15 pounds by eating nothing but one vending machine sized bag of plain M&Ms a day, and writing long, angry letters that I continually add to after each teary episode. Don’t know if that’ll work for you. Pretty much why I gave up on dating altogether…
Yep, it was Mr. California. I saw him this weekend and it was fine but we’re obviously just “friends.”
<sigh> apparently I am completely unattractive to the opposite sex. Oh well.
I have lost weight, which is bad, but that in large part is because I have a bunch of other crap happening right now.
Basically this whole “love” business is nothing more than a pain in the ass and I need to be able to focus myself on other stuff that I have going on right now.
So - I need help, stat.
Become busy.
Sorry - I know that’s not a lot of help, but I find that having a great many things to do that I actually do (as opposed to having things to do that I never actually do because I’m sitting around with a broken heart) at least distracts me from the broken heart. If you keep it up long enough, the heart will heal itself.
Not to mention actually accomplishing things (taking a class, learning a skill, cleaning my house, volunteering my time, spending time with my family - whatever) does wonders for the self-esteem.
Being busy is good. Eating is good, exept that it’s not, but I already know that’s not such a big item on your list. You could ask lots of other guys out on dates. Time seems to be the best thing with the caveat you are busy during that time. Moping really just prolongs it. Good on you for deciding not to be a mope.
I think you should definitely go buy a car.
Paste.
Use Paste.
Not Glue.
Not Tape.
Paste.
You’re very welcome.
heh - yah, that might help.
I just had a problem like this recently and the best thing I can tell you is: Don’t Fan the Flames! I know it’s not in the least bit original, but, for me anyway, the tendancy is to make things worse by hammering away at any raw corner of ego I can find.
I have no idea how to make yourself feel better-- I’ve seen some good advice so far in this thread-- but, if you can, avoid worrying at the wound.
Recognizing that you don’t want to mope is a great start. 
From there I recommend making time to spend with some family and/or friends. Traveling is awesome too. It’s easier to be somewhere new for a little while. See some new sights. It also helps to find a creative outlet and let yourself hurt sometimes. (Write a letter or a song, paint a picture, color in a coloring book, whatever)
And stop that nonsense about not being attractive. I’ve seen your pictures and I’m quite certain that the majority of both genders find you entrancing.
Also, recognize that this only hurts so bad because it’s happening now. You know it’ll pass. You know it’ll be okay. Sometimes it just helps to remind yourself as much.
I always dealt with it by moping, crying a lot, listening to sad music and basically becoming a recluse for months on end. (this was after a four year, living together relationship imploded.)
Since that’s not the route you want, I’ll second (third, fourth…whatever we’re on) the keep busy suggestion. Throw yourself into your work, hobbies etc. Learn a new skill, whatever floats your boat just keep your mind and body active.
I second the recommendation to do something physical. I tend to be a busy sort, so I would keep it out of my head all day - and then at night, would lie awake thinking of it. I found if I exhausted myself every day with physical exercise, I would at least sleep better.
Nope. I’m the kind of woman that other women think is really pretty, hot, and assume that men find attractive.
Based on my experience, men think I look high maitenence which isn’t a huge seller for most of them. Even my ex-BF who I’m still good friends with agrees with me - I look like a lot of work. I’m not actually a lot of work, but I look like I am.
Like I said, oh well. I’m not that worried about that particular part of the broken heart business.
I just hate that burning feeling in my chest. However, I’ve been doing a bit of reading and I think it might actually be a peptic ulcer…
Me, I used time and beer. Lots of beer. Probably not a good idea in retrospect, but that’s what I did. I got involved with someone else about six months later, but still wasn’t totally recovered for months afterwards.
However, I am now happily married to my rebound (and my ex is happily married to hers!).
Don’t listen to Bosda.
Duct Tape works better than anything.
Duct tape IS a wonder material.
I found that rearranging furniture helps. It’s physical, keeps you busy and actually has a decent end result (well, mostly). And breakup ice cream. My boy friend calls any ice cream invovling more than one kind of chocolate that.
Boxing. Kickboxing. Karate.
I like to feel physically beat up to get my mind off feeling emotionally beat up. So when I am feeling down I go to the dojo and let one of my instructors beat the crap out of me. Occasionally I will beat the crap out of one of them which is also cool.
This stemmed from the need to “keep busy” which is a wonderful suggestion. I have kept busy in a lot of ways over the past 10 years or so, and karate and boxing have so far been my favorite ways to keep busy, get rid of anger and make myself tired enough to sleep.
The world in which a redhead with a nice rack who puts out can have her heart broken is not one that I want to live in 