How do you think PJ will ruin RotK? (spoilers)

OK, so this is the thread where we can predict how Peter Jackson may further rape the good professor’s vision and life work.

Let’s recap:

Fotr - I thought Fellowship was done beautifully. Sure, certain things were omitted, but they had to be due to time constraints and it is thereby reasonable.

TTT - Oh, where to begin? Well, how about the elves being at Helm’s Deep? Or the Ring being taken to Osgiliath? There is also the fact that Faramir’s character was completely altered, there was a pointless action scene thrown in on the way to Helm’s Deep, and then, to top it all off, the Ents acted hastily. Even when it was emphasized in both the book AND the movie that Ents aren’t hasty, Treebeard changes his decision at the drop of a hat and then all the Ents attack Isengard.

Now, onto RotK. After seeing the trailer, I must say, I actually have faith in Peter Jackson this time. I really dont think there is any way he could screw this up. There are only two things that worry me.

  1. The haunted cave. I’m HOPING that this is the Path of the Dead, that will take Aragorn south so that he can steal the ships and come north up the river to aid at the battle of the Pelenor. But the fact that it’s only he, Gimli, and Legolas entering, without the company of the Rangers, and the fact that the few shots in the trailer make it look like it will be an action scene, have me very nervous.
  2. There is also a rumor rampant on the net that for the conclusion of the movie, Sauron will appear in physical form and fight Aragorn one on one. Now, I’ve been able to tolerate everything up until this point, just barely, but if Peter Jackson even DARES this, not only am I walking out, but I’m throwing away my FotR and TTT dvds and pretending this whole thing never happened. That and I’m sure Peter Jackson would be lynched by a mob of angry fans should such a scene take place.

So what are everyone else’s predictions?

I predict that PJ will change some things for the sake of smoothly translating a monumentally long book to a 3.5 hour film, enrage the purists, and thoroughly entertain those of us who don’t mind changes as long as they retain the spirit of Tolkien’s epic.

But then, I loved The Two Towers.

This may be a misunderstanding of the scene where the Mouth of Sauron (Sauron’s lieutenant, or something) comes before the army. In the book, Gandalf strikes him down, if I recall correctly… frankly, I wouldn’t consider it that terrible if they change it to a battle with Aragorn instead.

I liked Faramir better in the movies than in the books. Boromir, too. :stuck_out_tongue:

I’m sorry I can’t cite it, but I’m certain I read somewhere that PJ decided against the “Sauron in physical form” scene and re-filmed it to more closely resemble the book scene. If this is true, I feel happier about it, but I have to admit that the Sauron we “saw” in the prologue to FOTR was pretty darned kickass.

I predict that PJ will rape ROTK by rescuing the beauty and power of the mythology and meaning of Tolkien from the good professor’s clunky prose, wooden characters (and I’m not talking about the Ents) and glacial pacing.

ROTK will be ruined by PJ simply releasing it, thus giving fuel to all the anal-retentive fanboys who can do nothing but piss and bitch and moan about all the differences between the movie and the book.

I loved Two Towers, but it had some really cringe worthy moments.

What was worst?

Maybe when Aragon falls of a cliff and everyone thinks he’s dead? It’s like the filmmakers forgot that Gandalf also fell down a cliff and everybody thought he was dead, which we have already seen, not once, but twice.

Completely worthless, and to add insult to injury it also gives way to that blundering, soft filtered, laughable dream sequence, topped of with a pointless and dull Sunset Beach’esque father and daughter conversation between Elrond and Arwen. I was half expecting her to start flinging crystal champagne glasses after him and clawing at the curtains. The only sane reason I can fathom why they would include this at all, is so that they could plaster Liv Tyler’s mug all over the movie poster again.

Or how about when Legolas skateboarded down the stairs on a shield and kick-flipped (or whatever) it into that orc’s chest? That jerked me right out of the movie. Incidentally this was my fifteen-year-old brothers favorite scene.

Things I fear:

A pompous Braveheart style rallying of the troops before the big battle.
Sauron comes out of his mansion and starts kicking ass.
More shoddy CGI effects, like those hyenas from Two Towers.

I don’t really care about all the differences between the book and the movie, sometimes they are more than welcome. I’m just peeved when they add something totally out of character.

Preach it, pugluvr. That opening scene kicked so much ass that I knew Jackson had managed to pull the whole thing off. And while anyone can quibble with the details, as I myself have done with both movies so far, it’s still an extraordinary accomplishment, and some of the best filmmaking ever.

“nobody tosses a dwarf”

Elves out of Helm’s Deep! Elves out of Helm’s Deep! The whole world is watching!

Other than that lapse, TT was pretty good. I didn’t even mind the detour to Osgiliath. I thought Faramir lacked a little complexity in the book.

Sam’s little speech at the end was a little embarrassing, though.

PJ will do just fine. ROTK will be very enjoyable. It’ll inspire me to re-read HOMES once again (at least the volumes pertaining to LOTR) and that can’t be bad.

I believe that cave in the trailer is indeed the Paths of the Dead. Nothing else would even make sense to me.

The one thing that I’m already very, very disappointed in has been known for some time: they’ve taken out the Scouring of the Shire. The little glimpse we saw in the Mirror of Galadriel was all of that we’ll get to see.

However, if PJ and company stay true to the ending of the book (the Gray Havens) and keep with the spirit of the story (which they’ve done magnificently so far), I know I’ll be happy with the film.

I’ll be happy because there will be:

“Horns, horns, horns. In dark Mindolluin’s sides they dimly echoed. Great horns of the North wildly blowing. Rohan had come at last.”

I am already disappointed, because there won’t be:

"Then he heard Merry change the note, and up went the Horn-cry of buckland, shaking the air.

Awake! Awake! Fear, Fire foes! Awake! Fire, Foes! Awake!"

I think he has already blown it for me by not getting the tone/spirit of the books right, granted this is mostly subjective. Getting it right is probably an impossible task anyway. Also the elves to me are all wrong.
I reread the books to see if the movie distorted my imagination. Luckily it didn’t. All of the drastic changes are lame in my opinion.

Really the only thing I’m afraid of is changing the scene at the crack of Doom. That’s one of my favorite moments, and if they somehow make Frodo more heroic and resist the ring or Gollum less clumsy or something like that, then I’ll be really disappointed.

I’m looking forward to how the movie will portray the moment when Sauron sees that the ring is right under his nose and it’s being held by a lowly Hobbit, and his sudden sense of dread and desperation as he sends a bunch of Nazgul to get it.

Now I’m certainly not the world’s biggest LOTR nerd, but I think this interpretation of Sauron’s reaction might be a little off. I think Sauron would have been delighted when Frodo put the ring on in Mt. Doom. Furthermore, I don’t think Sauron ever thought there was any chance the ring could be destroyed, because his will, working through the ring, would invariably prevent a ringbearer from destroying it (as happened with Isildur).

But, despite its powerful will, the ring is still occasionally affected by chance. It came to Bilbo by chance, and it was destroyed by Gollum by chance.

I just had to quote that. What a perfect answer for a riduculous Subject Line.

“Well, how about the elves being at Helm’s Deep?”

There aren’t enough eye-rolling smileys to convey how silly a nitpick this must seem to non-book readers. They were there, and it was thrilling and tragic and poignant, but they weren’t supposed to be there, so we should all forget what we saw and felt, and turn a nasty eye toward Jackson? I don’t think so.

I think the only raping going on is the violation of the stodgy, unimaginative, narrow-minded Tolkienistas that start honking like alarmed geese at the slightest change to their Precious.

Its nnot so much that its a change, but that it was a pointless change made simply to appeal to the public. There as no reason to change it.

But it doesn’t really bug me. What irritates me is that PJ made Theoden’s common-sense manuver to stand in Helm’s Deep sound like a cowardly escape.

(apologizes for giving Theoden a bad “Gangsta” accent.

“I’m thinking me and the boyz will go ahead to that shiznat fortress, Helm’s Deep, yo! We be smacking around any ‘o them Ork Boyz that like peeps, yo! An’ the wimmin and the chillin’ be goin’ south. Word!”

Man, Gandalf, I know your idea of a suicidal charge with calvarymen into the middle of a huge army of pikemen sounds good and all, but, gosh, I’m not sure I’m brave enough to do it. Man, I think instead I’m going to huddle down in this nigh-impenatrable fortress with my scrawny band and wait for backup. Oh, yeah, I’m going to take all the women and children and make them stay in the fortress, too, so that if we lose they’ll all die. Man, aren’t I a genius or what.

So, in other words, PJ’s version makes Gandalf look like a twit while calling Theoden a coward. This is what happens when people who never bothered to even read a damned book about military tactics change things from brilliant and studied professors.

People! Have you seen the preview? It was stunning and marvelous and awesome.

But I can already see plenty of things that the nit-pickers will be able to bitch about. Elrond’s giving Aragorn the sword, apparently only at Arwen’s insistence, no Rangers from the North in the Paths of the Dead, etc.

Me, I’ll just sit her squeaking and gibbering in anticipation.