Well, the internet tells me Nelson Mandela spent 27 years in jail. You’ll never be as good as him unless you can do 28, Trump!
He reminds me so much of that one Dennis the Menace episode in which Dennis and his pal read Made in USA on a light bulb as Made in Yoo-Suh. The writers had Dennis do that for comedy. The Damn Yam isn’t funny.
Lock him up! Lock him Up! Lock him up!
No Donald, no human being on the planet has ever looked at that two letter word and thought it shares some similarity to the US before. Not ever. How have we gone this long without your genius?
I would love to see Jordan Klepper ask a couple of trump fans if they’d ever considered such a deep thought before and hear what they have to say. Then I will go cower under a blanket in fear for my country until I die.
The only DtheM episode I can remember is one in which Dennis rotates a street sign and they end up digging a swimming pool in the wrong back yard. I’m sure that mirrors something trumpian.
I’m willing to run the risk that he might win a Nobel Peace Prize, too, if it means locking him up for almost 30 years.
I wonder if you can get Filet-o-Fish in prison?
Doubt it. You have to move Heaven and Earth to get soda in a psych hospital.
Even so, thats a tenuous comparison.
The kind of place where Trump is likely to end up, if he serves time, he might be able to get something like it.
I’m thinking of where Martha Stewart served time. Now, Trump wouldn’t go there obviously, because it’s a women-only prison, but as a minimum security place I would expect it wouldn’t be too different than where he’d be most likely to be incarcerated if he went to prison.
If you’re thinking something along the lines of “wow, Martha Stewart must have served hard time in federal prison,” think again. As a minimum security prison, Alderson has no armed guards. Rather than women staying behind bars, the prison is set up more like a college campus with dorms and mandatory employment for inmates, of which it currently has 681. There is also no barbed wire fence and an AP report from when Martha Stewart was incarcerated said that the front gate even remains open.
But I’d say home confinement would be even more likely.
I would love for him to have to have a “job” - like working in the kitchen - in a minimum security prison. Make the son-of-a-bitch uncomfortable somehow! Do they have minimum security State prisons, that aren’t Club Feds?
I don’t think he could be trusted as a worker. He’d always be looking for ways to get someone else to do his work for him.
I’d be okay with toilet duty for him. Make a guard stand over him so he can’t get out of it.
The dipshit thinks that if he notices something for the first time, that he is the first human on the planet to notice it and wants to show everyone like a toddler wants to show people that he pooped in a toilet.
Yeah, but in the Damn Yam’s case, he grabs the turd in his hands and runs around showing it to all and sundry.
It’s not like the “Club Feds” are luxurious, they’re like really bad summer camps.
That said, Trump is gonna like being in prison. I’m basing that opinion on what I’ve read about the experiences of Jordan Belfort and Bernie Madoff.
No matter what menial chore he’s given, the other prisoners will beg for the chance to do them for him. They’ll all want to do his laundry for him, to be his butler. He’ll be a rockstar on the cell block, the ultimate successful con artist. He’ll have a literal captive audience and he’ll never hear anything negative about himself ever again. Plus it doesn’t hurt that he’s rich enough to fund a lot of commissary accounts without feeling the hit.
And he’ll like the food, we all know that Trump prefers shitty overcooked food to the good stuff.
No, I think he’ll do poorly in prison, especially if not allowed to post on social media. He won’t have to fear for his physical safety, but he’ll go insane. After a lifetime of never having to face any consequence for anything he did, he’ll never process that at long last he’s paying for his crimes. That will drive him batshit crazy.
i don’t care one way or another, as long as he’s there.
Bonus points if his business empire is destroyed. And triple bonus if enough of his co-conspirators are locked up to discourage future wannabe dictators from pulling the same shit.
Pretty sure he’ll think the other inmates should fund his commissary account and be thankful for the opportunity. The grift never ends
Deny him ketchup. He’ll take a day to totally crack.
I’ve always wondered how much comfort a rich criminal could swing relative to the well-worn movie trope where they end up living in relative luxury.
Assuming a warden amenable to legal cash splashing but not outright bribery, what are the options? What’s the best way for a billionaire to make his time as comfy as possible?