At an antisemitism event, Trump blames Jews for his pending election loss.
From Yahoo:
Former President Donald Trump said Thursday that “the Jewish people” would be partially to blame if he loses in November, escalating his persistent campaign trail criticism of Jewish voters and insisting that Democrats hold a “curse” over them.
There appears to be a venue called Kuss Auditorium. That seems appropriately named.
Or maybe he can get the bays cleared out and hold a rally in Katz Tires.
Well, what else would someone do at an “antisemitism event,” other than blame Jews for something or other?
Oh, wait, now I see what you meant. 
I think their view probably fits somewhere in realm of bullshit between truth and lies. Truth or falsity doesn’t really enter into it, it sounds good, and actualizes their feelings so they will accept it and spread it to others. Its like one of those glurge stories that Christians tell each other. Did a flock of geese really fly up in a shape of a cross over the funeral of a child who loved geese? It doesn’t matter. Even if its fault the larger point that its illustrating, that miracles exist, still stands. Do Haitians actually eat cats? It doesn’t matter. They might, and even if they don’t that doesn’t invalidate the larger lesson which is that immigrants are bad.
We would’ve won if we hadn’t been stabbed in the back by the Jews, does have a familiar ring. He must be catching up on his bedside reading.
His blaming the Jews should be the lead story on the political and general news front.
Slander, Libel, and Lies! We all know that the rabbit only had a small salad…
I thought that Katz were being eaten by Haitians …?
#QFT
I make fun of the fat greasy basketball often; I always knew they’d / he’d throw me onto ‘the truck’ to the camps if he won. But I’m an Atheist and people of many of different religions have taken time out of their day to point at, laugh at, and in other ways abuse me.
With this Rump statement, some of those words might spoil like curdled milk in their mouths. On the bright side, at least I’ll have some decent conversation on the truck when it’s on its way to the camps.
Indeed. Of course many of them justify—even to themselves—their unprincipled conduct as ‘necessary for the project of bringing back God to our government’ or whatever the hell.*
* literally, if there were ultimate justice.
My theory is that he got so much fundraising juice out of the two prior ‘assassination attempts’ that he thinks a third one would be just the ticket to grab more cash and more attention.
Also, there have been a dearth of “immigrant kills American” stories in the news. (He and Vance wouldn’t have had to push the ‘cat-eating’ story they already knew to be false, IF there had been enough legit news headlines about Evil Immigrants doing Evil Immigrant things.)
So he goes to Springfield, and ‘someone takes a shot at him’----maybe a situation such as the Florida golf course one, where the alleged would-be shooter was too far away to get off a shot. Still, it counts!!!
And so Trump achieves:
So Trump’s looking for a shot to win?
I can’t seem to find the exact quote, but I distinctly recall the Orange Peril making a comment along the lines of “We will be one nation, worshiping one God” &c — in other words, an updated Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Führer. So this doesn’t surprise me at all (disgust is another reaction entirely).
Is it this one?
Oh Jesus Fuck! So, which God do you think Trump will pick?
Jews already know they will be first on the excluded list. Doesn’t matter that Ivanka is Jewish now. She and Jared will get a special dispensation, but the rest of you are out.
It won’t be the Mormon one. They don’t even buy the right Bible, the one with Trump’s name on it.
Catholics? Then he would have to compete with the Pope. Nope.
Okay, that gets us to some form of Protestant God, probably a generic, open to interpretation one, right? So that kicks out Seventh Day Adventists and Jehovah’s Witnesses. Because everybody knows Saturday is for golf - just like every other day. And Trump won’t go for some weird forrinner God with a funny name. Who’s that Jehovah cat think he’s foolin’, he ain’t an American.
Let’s see… Episcopalian - wait, isn’t that Church of England? How un-American!
His evangelical base are going to feel betrayed when he kicks them out. I mean, they are way too uptight. How’s he supposed to enjoy the spoils of winning when they keep judging him for having affairs?
Let’s see, Southern Baptists have a nice ring to their name. And the whole slavery thing.
But then there are the Methodists. They’re pretty benign and generic.
Wait, there’s a group called Unitarian Universalists? Oh that’s perfect, because it’s all about unifying under one God together and - what do your mean, they believe anything goes? They let Pagans in? Oh we can’t have that. GET OUT NOW!
You know, nobody would have known how hard it is to pick the one God for us all to live under. I think the smart solution is to ditch all those other Gods and just worship Trump directly.
He believes in kinder, kuche, kirche, or at least the initialism thereof
Episcopalians are ’way too liberal, generally, for him to mean us. Mayor Pete is one, for instance.
Himself, of course.
Which denomination is buying all that Miracle Spring Water? That’s Trump’s flock, right there.
They also tend to complain when you teargas them so you can make a photo op.
AKA, Satan or Anti-Christ.