How have you been dumped/blown off?

Ohh Gee my turn. Lets see how much I remember

Boy (me) meets Girl through personal ads. We both were around 22.

Boy goes out with girl, things seem to click

Girl goes over to boy’s house to use the bathroom during a “date” ends up masturbating on boy’s bed (second date)

Girl tells boy she doesn’t know if she wants to date someone from the same town as her ex

Girl tells boy next night that she will give it a chance

Boy and girl talk on phone during the week all seems ok

Boy picks up girl for third date she wants to go to the movies

At movies girl intorduces boy to her new boyfriend (working at movies)

Stupidly boy does not leave girl there.

Boy takes girl and girl’s new BF to his house while he gets money

Boy still doesn’t leave them

Boy girl and girl’s new BF go to a diner

Boy still does not leave them there

Boy makes excuse on why he has to leave early

Boy drops each of them off at their houses

Boy never talks to girl after that

Boy read about girl and her friends being arresed a few years later for assult and abuse on a mentally retarted young man.

(Boy has since grown a spine and will never let this happen to him again)

Wow. You were young. But at least you’re older and wiser now, right? Sometimes the most important lessons are the hardest to learn.

After the anger, the hurt, the pain, the sickness-months. You realize the truth, that you viewed the other person thru rose-tinted glasses. That personality that you so truly adored never really existed, it was just a figment of your imagination. So in reality, it can never be had again; there is no hope of reconciliation. But the dream lingers, the memories burned into your imagination-the love of your life, it lives in your mind.

I can’t escape the pain, and its been years. I’ve never told any one this. Its my secret heartache.

Talking about it is the first step, Mahatma.

Here’s one that I just remembered that gave me a chuckle, not so much for the dumping, but for the aftermath.

Junior in highschool, and completely clueless about girls. So clueless that I don’t recognize one flirting with me for six months. Finally, practically at gunpoint, my friends get me to realize that, yes, this girl is interrested in me, and we should go out. We end up going out once before the end of the school year a week later.
I spend the summer in another state, she loses interrest in me. I come home, it’s my first break-up, it’s messy, I get a reputation for being a bit psychotic (in an angsty teen sorta way), and she goes out with one of my best friends.
Years later I’m talking to said best friend, and I mention to him that the first time I saw him with her, I wanted to murder them both. He says: “Oh, man, I wish you would have. It woulda saved me a WHOLE lot of pain!”

Dunno. Just amused me.

Not to make light of your unhappy memory, but the mental picture this sentence evokes is of you sitting in your living room, while this girl excuses herself to go to the bathroom and instead sneaks into your bedroom and masturbates on your bed.

Manny: (checks watch) “Man, she’s been gone a long time. I told her it’s probably not a good idea to order shrimp tacos at Denny’s.”

Later, upon discovery of the masturbated-upon bedspread:

“What the…?!” :eek:

Indeed. Live and learn. Life goes on. Boys come and go.

{{{mahatmacoat}}}

Got one like that. Ex-fiance and I had been together for 2.5 years; I graduated from college and took a job out of state for 4 months. Things started getting weird, but I thought it’d work out. Four months turned into (with significant discussion and ex’s approval, since this job was potentially very useful in my professional development) eight months. I visited for two weeks after the end of the four months, and things were REALLY weird. Still thought it’d work out. After my visit I get an email asking me if it would be okay if ex kissed another girl “only in the context of this role-playing campaign we’re in the middle of.” Errrmm… okay, says a very stupid kitty. Two weeks later it’s another email, “I’m really lonely and I just want someone to share a bed with… she doesn’t mean anything to me.” Okay, says an even stupider kitty.

I went to visit for a month at the end of my employment, and things were a complete and total mess. Even I could see it. But the actual breakup came in two stages… the first was the evening of our anniversary, when his parents took us out to a way-expensive restaurant and probably dropped about $400 on dinner. We go home, have sex, and as we’re laying there in the “afterglow” he says (totally out of the blue) that he’s in love with the other girl, and not only does she have a better body than I do*, but she’s better in bed than I am, and things are over between the two of us. Somewhere in there was the “I love you but I’m not in love with you” bullshit line. I’d been there for two weeks… the jerk had waited TWO WEEKS to tell me, and couldn’t have picked a worse time.

Next day we’re scheduled to meet up with Mamakitty for lunch and a movie. I’m pretending everything is okay, because Mamakitty was just coming through on her way to a business trip and I didn’t want to upset her. I apparently failed miserably. :slight_smile: As we’re watching the movie, now-ex leans over and starts talking about how he hopes I understood what he was saying last night about things being over between us. To add insult to injury, it was the same movie theater that he’d given me my engagement ring in.

:wally

I spent the next two weeks in Hell, since the trip had been quite specifically planned out time-wise and I couldn’t leave. Having to listen to him on the phone with the new girlfriend, talking in the soft voice he’d always reserved for me, was, I am convinced, my punishment for having abused the hell out of puppies in a former life. Ugh.

We’re coming up on the seven year anniversary of that one. Still stings.

-BK

*[sub] I feel the need to point out that I was, at the time, 5’6" and about 125 pounds of muscle. But she was an 18 yo former gymnast, so who was I to be able to compete?[/sub]

Ouch bobkitty! That is truly painful. You have my deep sympathy.

Seems like most of the people here should read about Commitment-Phobes.

Boy, my story could go on for a long, long time. How about the reader’s digest version?

Girl from HS. We met again after a few years. Fell in bed for a one-nighter. Girl doesn’t call…hhmmm…Meet again a few years later, develop friendship. Friendship turns into relationship the following year in January. All of the rush-into-it details are there (marriage, naming kids, etc.) because we had been friends for so long, it was just ‘natural’. By April things were already looking rocky, but I thought it was because of a distance issue (I was going to school out of town). In May I need to find a place to live for the summer. She wanted to move out of her parents house, so…We move in together 3rd week of May. I buy TONS of new apartment stuff (trash cans, silverware, spices, shower curtain, etc.). June 3, 1994 I pay her half the rent. June 4, 1994 we go shopping with her parents. I buy $138 of stuff (I remember this well). We get back to her parent’s house and she ‘needs space’.

Space? Space? We just f*!@#&$% moved in with each other! Where you want me to go? The bathroom? I just paid for June’s rent and bought $138 of stuff for the place as well as all the other things, and she needs space all of a sudden?!?

I freak and had a friend pick me up (controlling bitch, broke up with me at her parent’s house with no way for me to leave). I move in with said friend and try and work things out. She tries to manipulate everything and basically leaves me hanging. Ready for the clincher? She makes me move my things out on my birthday. BEEEEE-AHTCH! AND she gets upset that I bring a few friends to help me move. She actually expected me to move my bed and dresser and etc. without help from my friends…

Total mind-f**k. I am shattered and unfortunately have the worst job imaginable- menial-labour. Nothing sucks worse than working outside digging flower beds with no mental escape from the constant re-playing of he said/she said. It was hell.

OK, now I can look back and thank the gods that I dodged that bullet. My life with her would have been a constant series of train-wrecks. As it turns out, I met my wife just a few months later while on a study abroad to the Czech Republic (but we were just friends, we didn’t fall in lurve until the next year). And Wifecat is the coolest, bestest woman I’ve ever met.

But I still suffer mentally from that one. Being led on and on and not seeing the problems that are RIGHT THERE really messes with your self-perception.

-Tcat

ps- there are two interesting anecdotes about that ex. 1) Her brother once gave her a leychain that said “Cold-hearted bitch seeks nice caring guy to dump on.” I should have taken the hint. 2) My friend labels women like her flooring-carpenters. You know what flooring-carpenters say? “Lay them right the first time and you can walk on them for years.” The first few weeks of sex were awesome, and then it disappeared. She even gave me head in the beginning, then stopped. She wanted me to give her head, but she wouldn’t return the favour. I have learned from this. Don’t date women who demand things they refuse to give.

You have NO IDEA how much the idea of this happening makes me…

I did this, Squeegee. blush of incredible shame

Not on a first date, mind you…this coworker of mine had apparently had a huge crush on me for awhile, but I honestly swear-to-God thought he was gay, so I agreed to be his “date” to a college formal. (He was an opera major and they were giving out awards, or something. I thought he just invited me b/c he didn’t have a boyfriend and thought it would be fun to go with me instead.)

Well, after he drank too much and proceeded to stick his tongue WAY too far down my mouth, I realized that

a.) He wasn’t gay, and

b.) I didn’t find him remotely attractive. Particularly after he confided that he hadn’t had sex in two years and drunkenly whispered, “Will you sleep with me?”

We worked at a restaurant and I went there on pay-day to pick up my check and eat lunch, when he showed up and decided to sit at my table with me. He was being really pathetic and puppy-dog and I just didn’t have the guts, at the tender age of 19, to tell him I didn’t like him at all…I hadn’t even had the guts to tell him I didn’t want to kiss him, for God’s sake, so I couldn’t blame him for thinking I liked him…

So I excused myself “for a moment,” walked to the kitchen to “say hi” to a coworker, dashed into the back, took the service elevator to the parking garage, and drove away like a bat out of hell.

I’ve always thought that was a particularly cruel way to treat someone, but the sad part was he still didn’t get it! Casually asked me later, “Hey, what happened to you the other day?” Like somehow it was totally not a signal of some kind when the girl sitting across from you just never comes back from the bathroom. Even though she’d barely touched her food.

I don’t even remember what I told him but he called me at all hours for at least a month after that, leaving me his number over and over.

:smack: