how important is animal magnetism to you?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I’ve been with my current boyfriend for two years. We are compatible in the usual ways: foods, music, activities.
There are a few problems. We live an hour apart and sometimes battle about who’s driving to see whom. He loses his patience faster than I and his temper is ugly. For me the most disturbing is that there is no animal magnetism there for me…I find it very hard to get interested in being intimate with him.

So how important is it for everyone else? Do I give up the good things we have because I don’t have the “lust” feelings for him?

2

Animal magnetism is crucial - otherwise I can’t get the little bastards to hang on the fridge door properly.

Sorry…

3

I’ve been married 17 years and I STILL get butterflies in my tummy when I see Mr. Adoptamom. While sitting at my desk working, I will remember our first kiss … my heart flutters and I get that warm, mushy feeling all over again. And it’s only gotten better with time.

Having that “zing” for one another is mandatory in my book. Sure, there have been times in our relationship where the zing got misplaced … especially when we’re stressed, sick, or plain exhausted but it has always found it’s way back again. If the zing were gone permanently though … I would reevaluate before committing to a long term relationship.

4

Darn Gassendi, you beat me to it.

5

I’ve been in two relationships. In the first, I had little/no physical attraction for my boyfriend. We didn’t have much in common besides friends, having grown up in the same area, etc. Fortunately (or unfortunately, looking back on it now) I have a really high sex drive, (I’m worse than most guys I know) so not being that attracted to him wasn’t that big of a problem. I could easily get turned on just thinking about doing something sexual in general. It just wasn’t him that had me all hot and bothered.

Being in the opposite position now, it is much better to look over occasionally and think. “Heh. I get to make out with him later. Yay.” Not all attraction is through visualization, or even the physical aspect. The way he smells turns me on. So does his sense of humor. Sometimes he’ll say something so witty that I want to jump him…no physical attraction neccessary. Maybe you’re focusing too much on his appearance. Try to branch out.

And if even that doesn’t do any good…can you get along without it idefinitely? I don’t know. It depends on other factors. If you’re like me and can get turned on by the actuality of what you’re doing as opposed to who you’re doing it with pysically, you can make due. Plus, if you really love him, in time you might find that the animal magnetism comes later.

So do you give up on the relationship. At the moment, I say too soon to tell; give it some time. See if you can nuture some magnetism up. See if you can find another asset of his personality to be attracted to.

This last bit of advice might sound horribly shallow, but it’s all I’ve got left. Think of other men you find attractive, and see if you could bring that aspect to his apperance. Cologne? What if his clothes were really put together? Little things like that might make a big difference in his apperance, and therefore, his sex appeal.

But if, when all is said and done, and you’ve got nothing, no lust, no passion, then I say that no matter how much you love him, and no matter how much it hurts, you can’t overcome all of that. If it comes to that stage, your boyfriend is a friend.

Best of luck.

6

Huh. vB code doesn’t work in titles.

[Wayne’s World] I was not aware of that. [/Wayne’s World]

7

Hmm. The problem with not having that chemistry or magetic field with the bf is that someone WITH it might come along. Then RED ALERT!