How long of a sexual dry spell would it take before you did something stupid?

This is a highly subjective question, because I leave it to you to define “something stupid.” The stupid thing can be anything you would characterize as stupid, foolish, regrettable --whatever.

This arises because an acquaintance of mine confided that he’s getting back together with his ex-, when their last relationship ended after much drama, fanfare, and breakage of certain breakable household items. She was crazy, he said at the time.

Now he says he acknowledges this might be stupid, but it’s been a dry spell for him since the breakup and this has caused him to re-evaluate the value of rationality.

Unless he has a medical condition which prevents him from masturbating, I don’t see why he’d go to those lengths just for sex.

Well, he’s not that close a friend that we have discussed his masturbation habits, but in light of the fact that he appears to have (a) arms, (b) hands, and © the capacity to engage in conventional sex, I’d say he could also be jerking off if he chose, but apparently believes there’s a difference between self-relief and relief that comes (heh) from a partner.

? Really? Cause I’m leaving the thread then. My stupid would have been “one-night stand”, or something like that, and that is nowhere near that level of stupidity.

Really, it would depend on circumstances. Just got out of a devastating, heartbreaking relationship? It might be a while before I wanted to be with a man again. If the man I loved died? Ditto.

He’s crazy, too.

Well, that’s why I left it to the individual to define… plenty of folks don’t have any particular problem with a one-night stand, and it wouldn’t remotely register on the stupe-o-meter.


I don’t have any problem with it either. It’s just the “stupidest” thing I would do - I wouldn’t go back to my old boyfriend even if hell froze over.

Was going with 3+ years/Never when it occurred to me that I’ve ventured into the stupid in less time (6 months-3 years).

Stupid being defined by such ill-conceived activities as: hooking up with an ex, as per the OP; hooking up with someone I found physically attractive but otherwise completely unattractive; and fooling around with a friend’s girlfriend behind his back.

Well, for differing values of “stupid”, not long. I chose two weeks, but consider it a “give or take” number.

Here’s the thing… my libido borders on debilitating. I’ve considered lobbying for ADA protection, because there are times when I am just barely functional.

For the record, I don’t consider a one night stand inherently stupid. On the other hand, a one night stand with the wrong person, one that you KNOW, even as you’re doing it, is going to bite you in the ass, is stupid. And yeah, I’ve done that.

On the other hand, I’ve never actually rekindled a bad relationship over it (although I have had stupid one-night ex sex, see above), I’m not entirely crazy.

Six months or so. At that point I’d take home some crazy as a trade for having a partner. Masturbation is wonderful, but it get’s old.

My level of stupid isn’t that stupid, but drunken one night stands with friends tend to happen after 6 months to a year of solo status.

It’s only stupid I guess because I think it is stupid - neither party regrets it, we all have managed to carry on as friends and justc halk it up to “hey, guess we both needed that last night.”

Yeah, you say that now, but when the Apocolypse comes, society breaks down, and your ex- commands a tribe of wandering bandits that quickly capture the remaining sources of food and fresh water… THEN you won’t sound so certain!

But I digress.

I’ve done stupid things for sex when I wasn’t even having a dry spell. I put “less than two weeks” but my real answer is, “Am pretty much always willing to be stupid.”

So - busy tonight?

As an aging man, in my early 60s, let me tell you that sexual intercourse is as good as it ever was, but masturbation has become a real chore. The result is an “empty” orgasm more often than not. Very disappointing.

The last time I had sexual intercourse was Nov 7. In Vegas. But subsequently an old girl friend half way across Canada reconnected with me on facebook and I’m in the doghouse. I’ve broken off contact with the old girlfriend, but its clear that my wife needs time to recover.

Am I doing something stupid ? I don’t know, but I’m wondering if I’m a total idiot for waiting and standing by until my wife can “forgive” me.

I may have just jumped the shark and need to accept that our relationship will never be the same again.

What qualifies as stupid, exactly? Like, attempted rape? Because I’ve met people for one-off hookups through online channels before, and it didn’t strike me then or now as a stupid thing. But if my dry spell got long enough that’s the route I’d go. I don’t think I’d ever do anything I’d qualify as stupid.

The only guideline is: whatever act YOU think of as “stupid” qualifies as stupid for you.

Loneliness might make me do something stupid, but not just plain lack of sex.

Dude, I’ve never had a friend that close that I could talk about masturbation habits before.

I don’t think I’d ever do anything stupid and I’ve had a long dry spell since my wife left me quite some time ago and she wanted nothing to do with me long before she left. I can kind of see me getting back with an ex, not the wife, which is why I think I’ve avoided sending her photos of her family that I’ve had for years.