Flashback to yesterday. Bernse does the husbandly thing and does the yardwork… mowing the lawn and such. After which I have a beer.
I invite the new neighbor over for a beer After another beer or three myself, bernse discovers he is almost out of beer. Since I was drinking, Mrs. Bernse decides it would be wise if she drives me to the liquor store to get another case (since I invited the neighbor over). He shows up and we have a few. A little later on in the evening I finish all the beer in the house less 1. I had a total of 25 beer last night from about 4 o’clock to 11 or so. I was totally pissed. In my drunken stupor, I mention to the wife that I may want to buy a project car. She is more than a little hurt as all of her extra cash goes into paying the mortgage off and I am thinking of spending a few grand on a “toy”.
Flash forward a few hours, about 3AM. I wake up, naked, laying on a bare mattress (no sheets, blankets or pillows) in our spare room with no memory of how I got there. I stumble back to our bed. I proceed to fall asleep. I get poked and prodded since I am snorring so lound neighbors think the rapture is happening.
I wake up at 6. Mrs. Bernse is getting ready for work. I lay there and just moan “uuugghhhhhhhhhh” since the 4 alarm hangover is well underway. I also fart a lot. Needless to say, not a good morning for both of us.
Oh well, I bear it and come to work. I give the wife a call to apologize for being an ass (I remembered the conversation about the car) and to tell her that now I am sober I have no intention whatsoever of spending any money.
“How do you feel?” she asks. She then tells me I got sick 4 times that night. Twice in our ensuite. Twice in the main bathroom. In the sink. She cleaned both of them at 2 AM. She also got about 2-1/2 hours of sleep since I was snorring so much and tossing and turning. I don’t recall the slightest bit of it. Thats how I ended up in the other room though… after ralphing the first 2 times I ended up in the other room for some reason. Maybe subconciously I didn’t want to keep her awake in our bed. I dunno.
I beg for forgiveness for being an incosiderate fool/drunk/ass. I ask her how I can make it up to her. She says McDonalds breakfast in bed next weekend would be nice.
I am taking her out for lunch and getting her a dozen roses today… in about 10 minutes as a matter of a fact.
Cheri, I know you’re not reading this, but I loooove you!
Yes, it sounds like you married an angel. Not the only one though! MrsO has taken care of me on a couple of similar occasions which I prefer not to remember. Women are wonderful.
Pardon the brief hijack, but is this “beer” as plural the usual thing in Canada? I’ve heard it before, and I believe it was always from Canadians. Does “25 beers” sound wrong to you? Not a criticism, mind you. Just curious.
I never real thought about it before. I would say “I had 25 beer” instead of “25 Beers”. But I don’t know which is correct or not. I have heard both used in conversation though.
Come to think of it, I am probably the one that is incorrect. Seems to me I can’t do any right lately and my grammar sucks at the best of times.
You are married to the best woman on the planet. Had it been me, I would have killed you as you slept, if for no other reason then to get a good night’s sleep.
When I read the title, I thought smugly to meself, no, my husband is married to the best woman on the planet. But after reading the post, I have to agree with you.
I don’t mind if he gets drunk, stoned, farty, snorey, talks with his mouth open, or wants to watch <i>Battlebots</i> all the damn time. But one of my hard limits is dealing with vomit. He has beautiful long hair, and has asked if I would hold it back for him if he has to puke- sorry, babe. When you puke, you’re on your own. I even try to make him clean up my cat’s puke.
Geesh. Maybe I’m married to the best man on the planet. He also kills wasps for me.
:eek: - Perhaps a trip to the garden store is in order, also (in addition to the shoes and chocolate previously mentioned).
[sub]I tried so hard to fit something about the entire garden now filled with Shasta yellow daisies, daffodils and buttercups, but the muse was just not cooperative.[/sub]
I do have to admit that your wife is amazing in the overall scheme of things, but I feel your claim to the VERY best woman is a bit off mark. Unless Nymysys isn’t telling me something, I have the best woman as a fiancee.
I’d be willing to concede you have the second best though…
She’s seriously a keeper if she’s that understanding. Thanks for the warm fuzzies.
25 beers in one evening? Is nobody willing to say the obvious thing here? bernse, you’re an alcoholic. You may be able to confine yourself to occasional binges at the moment, but eventually it’s going to take control of your life. Do you want to do the best thing possible for your ever-forgiving wife? Then get some help. You’re lucky that your wife has been willing to tolerate your drinking so far. Don’t push your luck any further. 25 beers in an evening, followed by throwing up four times, is completely unacceptable.
The OP reminds me of the time when I was six years old, and had a nasty stomach virus, my mother changed my bedsheets three times in one night after I got sick in bed and vomited.
Yes. I met him that night (thats why we drove to the store to get more beer).
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Wendell,** I don’t know you one bit but I will give you a bit of free advice.
Don’t go around telling people what they are/are not based on one post. I won’t tear you a new one for calling me an “alcoholic” but that was uncalled for. You have read one post of mine that says I drank 25 beer in one evening. Therefore, using your logic since I had more than 6-8-10 (whats the magic number, Wendell?) I am an alcoholic.
I gather you never went to college/university and never drank your face off? How about a stag party? How about any kind of a party? Never staggering drunk? Never together with the SO on a hot summer days having a few more than you should? Here’s a news flash. A lot of people get totally shitfaced at one time or other for whatever reason and yes, even puke, but that doesn’t make them an alcoholic. Christ, if it did 1/2 the planet would probably be going to AA. I am for most parts a social drinker, and I may have oh, 3 beers a week on average (give or take). The other night was the first time in a looong time… and hopefully the last (at least for a while).
Am I an alchy? I don’t think so. I have never gone to the doctor about since my wife, family and freinds (people who know me a lot better than you) never mentioned the slightest concern about a drinking problem (maybe since I pretty rarely get “drunk” or drink more than 2-3 drinks at a sitting) so I haven’t bothered. Hell, I’m not concerned… and I think they (freinds/family) know me a bit better than you, Wendell. Thanks for your concern, but please don’t accuse people of something serious like that without knowing a fucking thing about them… or at least know more about them than what you read in one thread.
Well bully for you Wendell, but that doesn’t mean that you get to make snap judgements on other people. Why taint this thread about how lovely Bernse’s wife is with unwarrented accusations? That was unnecessary and uncalled for.