I don't quite get today's "Questionable Content" strip

Yeah, guess I should be paying a bit more attention then :smack:

People discussing whether they were “pre-op” or not. Things have changed rapidly in my community.

Then again, my experience in this specific area is very limited geographically at this time.

So, not to read to much into what you wrote, but I take it (some) people really do discuss these things before “third base”. Not a question, I think that’s what you just said and I’m rephrasing.

Which isn’t to negate anything Miller said, which is his own experience. Stuff varies. Obviously.

Well, Claire clearly had sex on her mind in today’s strip.

Indeed. Kudos to Martin for taking it slow, which is probably the right thing for an inexperienced Claire.

Yes, some people do. I’ve personally witnessed it several times. Example: one time at a club a very cute t-girl brought her date to the club to dance, and it was their first date. Unfortunately, he didn’t dance, so she was dancing with some other gals while he sat at the table. I spent some time talking with him and he said among other things “…yeah, she told me she was pre-op, and I REALLY don’t want to offend anyone but I’m trying to work out how I feel about that…” I told him the fact he went out on the date knowing that showed there was no way he could offend anyone over being uncertain. I told him “that’s something you have to think really hard about, and my advice to you is take it really slow, have some long walks in the woods by yourself to think about what you need in a relationship, and what matters to you in the grand scheme of things and what doesn’t.”

They dated for a month, then had an amicable separation. She was devastated, but at the situation, not because he offended her.

The answer clearly is that there is no way Claire would ever mention the status of her genitals to Martin - because if she did, the sheer force of her blushing would burst every blood vessel in her head. :smiley:

Well, my definition allows you to know that a man who is straight does not like to suck dick, while yours doesn’t allow you to know anything about him. Again, you can argue that no-one needs to know in any case, but then, why bother having the word in the first place?

Sure it does. I know that a heterosexual man is sexually attracted to women, not men. If a man identifies as heterosexual, I know not to ask him out. If I find out the this heterosexual man once dated a pre-op transexual, I’m still not going to ask him out, because the fact that he once dated a woman who had a dick doesn’t mean he’s remotely interested in dating men.

What about the case of a married straight man who is put in prison and while there actively solicits other men to give him oral. He then leaves prison and resumes his heterosexual family life but has become so enamored of the high quality oral he gets from (willing) gay men he seeks it out on the sly. Is he still “straight” in your opinion?

We’re getting into ‘Vegetarian, except for all that Pork Sausage he eats’ territory.

Well, since our example is a man dating a woman with a penis, your attempt at distinguishing orientation seems to come down to if a person of this sort is “really” a woman, and you’ve decided the answer is “no”, so therefore someone dating her is not straight. If I’m butchering your meaning, then no offense meant.**

I don’t think you get to make distinction. IMO, if she says she’s a girl, then by damn she is, regardless of the plumbing situation. Again, this just seems like basic manners, crossed with a sprinkle of “who made you the decider of such things?” I’m not trans. I’ve met trans people, but never dated any, this is just my attempt to think about and understand the issue. Perhaps someone (Una? Anyone?) will come along to clarify, and correct anything I’ve assumed incorrectly.

**Or perhaps you mean that the man in question isn’t gay when dating a woman with a penis if he ignores said penis entirely, then he suddenly becomes gay the moment he doesn’t? This seems strained and fairly ridiculous - at best - to me.

I’d call him pretty selfish.

Your Great Darsh Face, on re-read I may have assumed that your question related directly to dating a trans woman, but your example was narrower than that, so perhaps I’m assuming too much. Let’s just change the “you” in my post above to the General You, not you specifically. I stand behind the point I was making, but perhaps I shouldn’t have been making assumptions or arguing with a point you perhaps never made.

You know who’s going to actually pose the question about Claire, right? Pintsize.

Possibly right to her face. He’ll probably end up in the freezer again.

Pintsize doesn’t know Claire is trans, does he?

Yup - I came to the same conclusion: see post 1569.

Or, at the least, ask intrusive and embarrasing questions about their bedroom antics - even assuming it doesn’t know she is trans.

Hell, it would be way out of character not to. :smiley:

Anatomical issues aside, I just don’t know that Martin sees in her. The only thing I can conjure is that she makes him feel confident, suave and worldly because she is the only person in the whole strip I can think of who is more awkward than he is. I’m really bored and disinterested in this whole storyline. I could see what attracted him to Faye, Dora, and Padma, - they were all strong women. But this romance seems really artificial, like he is her big brother or something.

I agree that Claire is not the ‘type’ he’s been attracted to in the past. But, in comic time, this is like a week after he slept with Delilah. He’s had a moment where he realized he needs to find out what he really wants from life instead of letting life led him where it may. Claire having a crush on him is obvious to everyone, and as you mentioned, he’s fond of her in a protective sort of way. This is an easy relationship for him and it’s a way of him taking control of his life.

I would be unsurprised if there’s an arc in the near future about how Martin is becoming more assertive in general.

I’m reminded a bit of Scott Pilgrim and the high school girlfriend.

The majority of Americans, I would feel safe betting, are unable to think any further than “innie= girl; outie=boy.” They don’t want to consider mental gender identity, they don’t want to consider being socialized as a girl, they don’t want to consider hormone levels, intersex conditions, or third gender. It’s “innie or outie.”

People don’t want to ask, or think about the deceptively hard question of “what makes me a girl? What makes him a boy?”

And you won’t convince people otherwise. You can take a transgirl who has insistently, consistently, and persistently expressed her true gender identity since she could talk, put her on the correct hormones at puberty, have her grow up in a female social group her entire childhood and teenage years, and live, and work, and play, and love and walk this world as a girl, send her to college and have her socialize as a young lady 24/7, then have her enter the workplace facing job discrimination and lesser pay for equal work. And 9 out of 10 Americans will say “outie? It’s a MAN, BAY-BE!” Even after surgery many will stay say she’s a self-mutilating psychopath, a monster, a freak, evil, and even a threat to our way of life, Jesus, and our fighting men and women overseas.

Gender identity is real and within every one of us. When you can truly accept gender identity, then you can ignore a few ounces of flesh and blood. I’m a lesbian transsexual woman. I don’t really like the idea of sex with a man, but I don’t think I’d hate it. I just don’t “connect” mentally and emotionally with men. However, a pre-op transgirl to me is just another girl. Would I take care of her needs, penis and all? Sure, no hesitation.