Although this thread was spawned by a comment about not wanting to lose Facebook friends by revealing one’s atheistic leanings, the example I’m going to use is my wife. She is, if anything, more conservative than I.
But she works in an environment that includes a lot of liberal-leaning people, and at least one is willing to drop a friend like a hot potato because of that friend’s conservative views. Because my wife wants a smooth working relationship and enjoys non-political talk, she’s “in the closet” at work.
Less contentious example from me: I read a lot of different stuff, and some of it is material I just don’t admit to to almost anyone I know. For example, I’ve read all the Clive Cussler. When I’m asked about what I’m reading, I’ll talk about “The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao.” And it’s not a lie. But what I seldom mention is “Arctic Drift,” or “Medusa,” is on the nightstand as the next, last, or concurrent book.
So – what don’t you tell your friends about yourself? C’mon, you can tell us. We’ll keep it a secret, we swear.
That I sometimes buy celebrity gossip magazines. I don’t know why - I feel so dirty afterwards
I’ve also been reading The Kindly Ones for a really long time. It’s the book I tell people I’m reading, which is true, but in the time I’ve taken to read it, I’ve also re-read a couple of Stephen King novels and a few O magazines. Yeah, I read O. Don’t judge me!
I don’t think there’s anything about me that I care if it’s known to the world or not. I’m a libertarian, atheistic buddhist, omnivore and openly carry a gun everywhere I can. If anyone has a problem with any of that, we don’t have to socialize, and if you’re a co-worker who has a problem with that, I hope you’ll be as professional in keeping your opinions/debates to yourself as I am about your views.
It wasn’t commonly known among co-workers and casual acquaintances that my first wife and I were polyamorous when we were together, but that was mainly just to avoid all the damn q&a that came about when people found out. Our friends and family all knew.
One of my all time favorite things along these lines was something I saw a gun store owner wearing. His T shirt said, “Don’t tell my mom I own a gun store. She thinks I run a whorehouse.”
I don’t think I have anything even resembling a verbal filter. I’ll tell them anything and everything, whether they asked or not. If I had to pick something, I’d probably say “conservative”. Why do you think I take it out on you guys? But that’s mostly because I hang out with young, unemployed hippies. When I’m with my family, I don’t tell them I’m an atheist.
With friends and family, there’s not much. As someone said a long, long time ago: “there’s no point in trying to blackmail redtail, I’d only get laughed at”. And my friends are a very eclectic bunch - we all just deal with it. It does sometimes lead to some vigorous discussions, though.
If someone in my personal life is going to drop me because they disagree with my views or habits, that’s OK by me. That’s not the kind of “friend” I need.
OTOH, I’ve generally discussed very little personal information at work. I’m an atheist in the Bible Belt, a liberal in a very Red state*, and rather unorthodox in my personal life in a quite socially conservative culture. I just don’t need the hassle at work. I’ve learned that the hard way.
My current situation is different that usual, in that my office is full of tolerant liberals, so I’m more open than normal and we occasionally do have political or religious discussions. But I still don’t get into much personal info at work.
*Does anyone but me still giggle that the Republicans are Reds now? Better dead than Red!
There’s a show on the Oxygen network called Snapped about female killers. It’s dreadful. They take what limited footage they have about each crime and stitch it together with some narration. The first three or four minutes after each commercial break is a recap of what was just presented before the break. Like most of the true crime genre, it’s not really usefully informative, and is just a voyeuristic time waster.
I watch it religiously each time my Tivo records it in its suggested viewing folder. I won’t actually schedule any recordings, though, because then someone might see that I did so.
I’m pro-choice, and most of my friends are as emphatically liberal as I am. So I don’t tell them that I think abortion is pretty shitty and can really only imagine a handful of extreme scenarios where it seems morally justified to me.
I also do not advertise the fact that I’m extremely pro-immigration. Even most Democrats I know would probably be uncomfortable with my views on that subject. The main reason I don’t discuss it is because I feel so emotionally affected by the plight of immigrants in the U.S. that it’s impossible for me to maintain my composure and have a rational discussion about it. I’m hoping as I learn more, that’s going to change.
I…sometimes I go on Internet message boards. I find threads where people have posted embarrassing things about themselves. Then, I go through their posting histories and see if I can piece together the little clues to figure out their real identities. Once I do that, I Google them, find out where they work, and send anonymous notes to their friends and co-workers revealing all their dirty little secrets to everyone they know.
Wow, I feel better already! I’m really glad I got that off my chest!
So, uh, the rest of y’all carry on.
I watch pro wrestling. I’ve defended it here before (though I’m the first to admit that it’s perhaps the lowest-brow form of entertainment there is) but I’d never do it around most of my friends.
I actually met a former pro-wrestler a couple of months ago… my friend’s fiancé. His passion, other than wrestling, is insurance claims adjustment and underwriting. He is an extremely analytical man.
I’ve really never been able to think of wrestling the same way since.
