Thursday is Back to School Day.
After the bus leaves, at 9:00, I will go upstairs and put my pajamas back on. I will come back downstairs and watch, first, Gods and Monsters, and then Boogie Nights. No one will have to be bribed with candy to stay upstairs while I watch a “mommy movie”.
While I watch movies, I will eat cookies. No one will say, “Hey, it’s not fair, you get cookies and we don’t!” Also, I may or may not eat a bag of Cheetos. If I do, no one will say, “Hey, where’d you get those? I WANT SOME!”
I will drink pop. No one will say, “How come you got a pop?”
By the time Boogie Nights is over, the Better Half will be home for what in the Post Office is referred to as a “nooner”. Afterwards, I will put my pajamas back on.
During the afternoon, until 4:00, I will occupy myself by sitting at the computer in my pajamas, reading every single thread in MPSIMS and IMHO. No one will say, “Aren’t you done yet?”
At 4:15, when the bus comes, and my hungry children loudly demand food, I will gently direct their attention to the large inventory of Freezer Queen entrees downstairs in the basement, whose microwave instructions are easily comprehensible by even a child of 10.
At 4:20 I will go back upstairs to my room, carrying with me two (2) Lean Cuisines, prepared ahead of time, a jumbo-sized bag of Baked Lays chips, and a 20 oz. bottle of Pepsi.
No one will disturb me.