My best friend just got engaged and asked me to be his best man. I was happy and proud until I remembered that the “best man” has things he has to do… now Im panicing.
Help me out here, what are the best mans responsabilities??
I want to do everthing right. Am I in charge of the bachleor party? a speach? things like that? I think those are things I have to plan. Ack.
Above all… do I get “right of the first night?”
Yes, you plan the bachelor party.
Yes, it is customary for the best man to give a speech.
No, you do not get right of first night. (I already tried that one.)
It is also your job to supervise the trashing of the groom’s car during the reception, take the place of the groom should he pass out (or run out) during the ceremony, and above all – DON’T LOSE THE RING!!!
Sorry about the double threads. My subject line also came out chopped off, oh well it works.
Hey bratman… you know any good speaches? Hookers? Strippers?
Speeches – only know the one I wrote, and I’m not sharing.
Hookers – I could give you my ex’s phone number if you want.
Strippers – yes, but I don’t know if they’re willing to leave the general St Louis metro area.
B_line, I have removed the second instance of this thread. For future reference to anybody happening to wander in here, the best way to take care of this is to notify me at rseaney@teamsigma.com. Hopefully then I can get the copy deleted before anyone posts to it. That should help keep things clean.
Also, B_line, if you care, let me know what is missing from your topic title and I can fix that. A known bug in the vBulletin deletes any text contained in quotation marks in the thread title.
thanks unclebeer. 'perciate it! I didnt know that about the quotation marks, thats what did it. I’ll remember next time. That subject line works fine for me though… L
Actually, B, it’s not a speech.
You give the first toast just after the bride and groom are seated at the head table.
B_Line12,
I sympathize with your angst. Mine is the honor to be the best man for two ceremonies next year. I guess that makes me something better than just the “best” man. “The Most Riotous Man”, “Fabulous Man”, “That Man That All The Cute Girls Should Date But Don’t” . . . I dunno.
I have given very little thought to the whole ordeal (but don’t tell Nen that). Just content yourself with the fact that you are, at least for that day, The Best Man. So, get drunk, drop your pants and sing “I’m a Little Teapot”. They can’t revoke your title.
Damn the auto correction in my text editor!
I sympathize. I’m best man at a wedding on Saturday, and these people expect me to make some witty remarks during my toast… honor, schmonor, I’m going to have to write these things down! Just like work! Ah, but I’ll get my revenge!
hehhehheh…
::walks away muttering something about embarrassing stories about the groom::
but without wishing to be overly negative, I didn’t.
I was best man for one wedding, and an usher for another. Didn’t enjoy either time. This shouldn’t be taken as a criticism of either wedding party, as, in both cases, the planning was taken care of by others, and there were no last minute stresses and strains.
The wedding I was best man for took place in Hawaii, right after I started my current job. I hadn’t accumulated vacation time, so I had to pretty much fly in and out during Thanksgiving weekend. Not fun. No bachelor party because the groom didn’t want one. I’m not much for bachelor parties myself, so I wasn’t bummed.
One amusing thing that happened was that before the return flight, I bought a shitload of those shell necklaces for the people in my office. In that same bag I packed a book. Looking back, I guess that this rectangular object with a whole bunch of wires protruding from it might very well look like a bomb.
Anyway, I’m not much for ceremony, so that’s probably part of the reason I didn’t enjoy it. (I did give a toast; quoted Shakespeare, and it went over pretty well, I suppose)
I’m also man enough to admit that envy probably played a role in my relative unenjoyment. Not having a girlfriend compounded the situation, too.
The best thing is, most of my friends are now married. After being sucked in twice, I’m pretty determined that I won’t be in any more weddings, until mine.
Which means I won’t be in any more weddings.
So as not to end on a negative note, you’ll get a lot of help from others in your planning. And even if you botch the toast, who’s going to remember it a year from now. Or even the next day?
Well I feel I have to offer a counterpoint to DRY here.
I’ve been a best man four times now, a groomsman twice and an MC three times. Yes I am turning into a professional attender of weddings. As a single lad this isn’t too distressing though as the years go by the bridesmaids are becoming more likely to be attached… sigh
Anyway before I digress too much: being a best man can be a lot of fun and unlike the female counterpart there isn’t all that much you have to do. Organising a bachelor party/bucks night isn’t too hard after you’ve ID’d all the relative friends and family and the speech should follow a format somewhat along the lines of:
responds on behalf of the bridesmaids (best man traditionally speaks after the toasting of the bridesmaids) agreeing that they DID look lovely today etc.
starts with a personal anecdote of his friendship with the groom. Starts off serious (threatens to become emotional)
allows personal story to meander into another story where the groom is embarrassed in front of everyone. Not too embarrassed though - you want everyone to be laughing at him not being mortified at you or him.
say something wonderful about the bride (how lucky he is, how pretty she is, what a nice person she is). This further endears you to the crowd and makes them more receptive for the final part:
another verbal riposte at your mate the groom.
If you don’t have any funny stories (or none you can share in public), the answer’s simple. Just make one or two up. He’ll deny it of course which will only make people believe it def. must be true.
Try to finish with a heartfelt declaration of emotion and/or friendship.
Nothing to it.
I may have disliked it, but I’m not saying everyone does, or should. I hope it’s a positive experience for any and everyone else.
In my opinion, the toast is a snap. Planning, dealing with the strained emotions and nervousness (AND BEING ALONE, if you are/were) is the difficult part. The toast’s a piece of cake.