Not only did I just purchase a red Minnie Mouse holiday sweater for myself, but I purchased a matching one for my dog.
Yes, you read that correctly, my little fluffy dog and I are going to be wearing matching red Minnie Mouse holiday sweaters.
Men will instantaneously be repelled by my very presence in their neighbourhoods. They will run screaming at my approach. They will weap and cry like little girls. Frankly, it’s a shame that I have no way to catch it all on film…
What hs your dog done to merit such mistreatment? Animal abuse is againsrt the law.
You can’t just make a statement like that without pictures.
Nuh uh! He loves it - he was prancing around showing it off.
alice,
Why don’t you just buy seventeen cats and get it over with.
Aww-c’mon over. I’d like to see what your form does for Minnie’s ears.
Sorry. I’m outta here!
So, um…does that mean that we can’t boink like wild rabbits?
What you see as ‘showing it off,’ was almsot certainly him looking for someone to end his miserable torment.
I promise I will not flee when you get within 50 miles.
I will flee only if I see you and your fashion-accessory mongrel.
That dog is totally going to get his ass kicked by the other dogs in the neighborhood.
This is very true. You’ve set up a sure fire way to get your dog’s head peed on when you’re not looking.
Don’t you DARE go to the dog park when he’s dressed up like that.
Hell, if I see it, I might pee on your dog’s head.
You realise it’s a dog and not a person right?
Poor thing.
The Fourth Knitter of the Apocalypse
I’m blowin’ my own horn here, but it is for a good cause. Hideous Knitwear.
Holy moly. That stuff is wrong. Just wrong.
Perhaps matching Minnie skirts will bring the guys around…
You guys are mean. My dog LOOOOVES his new sweater. If it helps, he’s actually the biggest dog in my neighbourhood, weighing in at a rompin’ stompin’ 16 pounds of fury. The little 6 pound chahuahuas won’t be peein’ on nuthin!.
Also, as you boys forget, a red holiday sweater on a fluffy little dog is a magnet for chicks who are just dying to scratch his belly. My dog is a total belly scratch slut, so he ain’t complaining.
Furthermore, my mother is convinced that by wearing the sweaters I will attract the “animal lover” subset of men. I’m not convinced.
By this I can only assume that your mother is referring to “Men who love animals” in the Jerry Springer sense.
Well, first, did you WANT men to flee? If NOT, I’m wondering whether you live within 500 miles of me and whether you are considered CUTE?
I mean, it may be bad for you, but it would mean more Alice for me!
(Too bad there isn’t an emoticon for rubbing hands together enthusiastically.)
True Blue Jack
So – are you planning to act like a dog, and lie on your back so that men can scratch your belly? That might work for some men 