And a bag, and nifty stuffed animal sockie type things for my woods, and golf shoes, and a Packers divet fixer thingy, and a glove, and a sand wedge (starter set didn’t come with one), and balls, and tees. I’m a golfer! whooohooo!
Now all I gotta do is figure out how to hit the damn ball.
There’s a pork chop in every beer.
What, no laser rangefinder that you can use to tell you to the yard how far it is to the next hazard?
They make those? I need one, I know it…
There’s a pork chop in every beer.
Hitting the ball isn’t hard. I get to hit it waaaaay more times than anybody else I golf with. (Maybe that’s why I only golf once a year. Oh yeah. It rains all the time here. That too.)
You betcha! I have a Bushnell 600 model rangefinder that weights only ten ounces and measures distances to +/- one yard up to 600 yards away! Bought it for only $215 on Ebay.
I keep telling my wife that it’s simply not relevant that I can’t hit a golf ball more than a third of that distance. Besides, now I know precisely how many yards it is from our front door to the end of the block. Say, wanna know how far it is from my front door to my mailbox? Wait, don’t walk away…
What no golf cart? Shucks, our city just made them legal to drive on the street.
Golf is one of the most intersting games in that the better you get, the LESS you get to do it (fewer strokes per round). I just hope Athena doesn’t get the idea that fancy equipment makes the difference (hiding his $300 titanium driver from view…)
Good luck Athena! 
A game of golf is a walk in the park - ruined.
Gadzooks!!! Blasphemy!!!
The hours I spend trudging around (and around) the golf course lugging my ancient bag (which, structurally speaking, is now about 80% duct tape) and bargain clubs are sheer bliss.
Mmmmmmmmm…goooooooooolf…
Ignorant since 1972
aschrott, you wouldn’t think it was so great if you had to play with my so-called pals, who mock me, throw me off my game with stupid pranks and take my money.
I hate their guts. We tee off at 7:30 tomorrow.
I hope it rains.
Wally, if you’re gonna blaspheme, at least you can attribute your blasphemy to the original author. 
I would, if I knew who it was.
7:30? Slacker!!! My partners and I teed off at 6:15 this morning (first ones on the course).
It didn’t actually rain on us, but it had rained all last night. Wotta soggy mess. Every green was covered with worms that had crawled up on them in desperate attempts to keep from drowning. (We gently moved the worms out of harm’s way before putting.)
This thread deeply saddens me.
[self-pity]
My rotator cuff is shot and I can’t raise a club above my head without pain. No golf for me.
So friends, if you’re out there chasing par and make a bad shot, think about how lucky you are to be able to play the game. I’d be happy to hit a ball 150 yds out of bounds.
So get out there and hit one for the Gipper!
[/self-pity]
Congrats on becoming a golfer. Like me, I’m sure you will learn many other golf related terms, like trap, hook, duff, hack and other four-letter words that would probably get this thrown in the pit.
Just remember if you are learning, let the faster players behind play through or they will start shooting at you. (I learned that the hard way.)
Take care.
Congratulations and welcome to a world of obsession. I took up golf about a year and a half ago. If you can’t beat 'em, join 'em type thing and I wanted to see my SO every once and awhile. Can I make a suggestion?
Take lessons. I have been taking lessons for over a year now. At first I went every week, for one hour, and then practiced at a local driving range a couple of times a week.(I’m also lucky enough to live on the 18th fairway of a beautiful private course so every now and then I can just drive the cart out back and hit a few). Now I take a lesson about once a month, to work on my short game since I don’t get to practice that as often. Also, my golf pro taught me all the best four letter words for using at the appropriate times.
If you learn the correct way from the very start, you aren’t going to develop bad habits (with any luck) and continue to practice those bad habits.
Good luck!
“Words fascinate me. They always have. For me, browsing in a dictionary is like being turned loose in a bank.” - Eddie Cantor
Yes, I plan on taking lessons. Just have to get around to scheduling them.
I got what I think is a great deal on starter clubs. $99/set, and you get to take them back within a year and trade 'em in for a better set. They give you the whole $99 back in credit for the nicer set.
We went to the driving range yesterday. I can now hit the ball, and sometimes it even makes it close to the first white flagy thing. SO tells me I’m doing great - but he just may be using positive reinforcement because he really really wants me to love playing golf. It’s been fun, so far!
I work for thrift shops, we have plenty of clubs, usually around one dollar each. Really nice ones too. Plus balls, about 25 cents each. Spend twenty bucks, youll be all set.
Wally–I also know the pleasure of annoying golf pals. My favorite is “stating the obvious” guy.
“Whoa—that’s going waaaay left”
“you didn’t hit it hard enough–nope, not hard enough” (after I leave a putt short)
I always want to say, “really?–I hadn’t noticed”. After a while I just tune it out, though.
Ignorant since 1972
Gadzooks, I caught Wally in a misquote. Ahem, “Golf is a good walk spoiled”-Mark Twain. yeah, I know “Putz!”
Welcome to the sport of the gods. I find the one thing that keeps me coming back is that one (or hopefully more than one) good shot per round. It is the most frustrating, yet fun way to waste some time. Remember to always look where your partners balls go. Tell them it’s a good shot when it is one.
Walk instead of riding in a cart, you see more that way. Don’t take it too seriously(something I’m working on). And always remember that being relaxed works better than being tense (this works in life as well as golf).
I may not be the worlds worst golfer, but I’m not far from it!