I know I don’t wander into MPSIMS all that often, but darn it, I’ve gotta tell somebody.
Four days ago, I got a vasectomy! Snipped! Cut! I discovered that I don’t want to be a daddy, and I can’t make myself want to be a daddy, so I figured I’d better take potential accidents out of the equation. There will be no little baby tracers running around.
Well, okay, that’s not necessarily true. I figgered the one thing that changes more often than the weather is my own mind, so I made a few deposits at a local sperm bank before I got my vas deferenses severed. I now have nearly 3 dozen vials of my own personal baby-batter ensconced safely away in liquid nitrogen, which should last for roughly 10 years. If some strange demon should posess me and I even think about making a baby more than 10 years from now, I suppose I could get the vasectomy reversed (cringe) or adopt or something, but any such option would be ludicrous because I’d be 66 years old before my kid was old enough to go to college. And that’s kinda old.
In the mean time, though:
Have any other dopers gotten their vas deferenses cut? I ask because it’s been 4 days, and although my spheroids have only ached a little bit since the anesthetic wore off, they don’t seem to be aching any less now. Is that normal? I just hope it’s not a sign of “post vasectomy pain syndrome”, which should more aptly be called “blue balls syndrome” because curing it involves unblocking one or both of the sperm ducts on the “upstream” end and turning a closed-ended vasectomy into an open-ended vasectomy. Gawd, I hope I don’t need that.
I had it done in November (and I’m now officially virile, feral, and sterile). Everybody’s mileage varies, it seems. My own story was a nightmare, as the right side was numbed nicely, thanks, but the left wasn’t, even after a second shot. So I underwent the second half of my procedure without benefit of anasthesia. Much pain.
But four days later…I was still tender, but not achy. I don’t think I was ever really achy, anyway, though. Putting the ointment on the sutures was a dicey exercise for a while, but I don’t recall much achiness.
The following may be TMI, so I’ve hidden it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
I did – uh – relieve the pressure in the shower about four days after the procedure, but prior to my follow-up visit to see if I could resume sexual activity. I was gentle as I could be with myself, and when I ejaculated, it was initially a little painful, and what came out first resembled nothing so much as a blood clot! Yikes. But nothing like that happened again, and all’s well.
Remember that you’re going to be healing internally for a while. Even when you’re given the okay to resume sex, take it gently at first. I think four days is a little too soon to be worried about aches. But you should be going back to the doc shortly, no? If you’re still bothered by it, ask.
I recall a previous poster related his story, the gist of which he was told to expect a “gentle tug” after the anesthetic was administered, yet he (manly?) suffered through the operation not knowing that the anesthetic was administered improperly and he felt the whole thing.
I wish I could find that - however, there are a billion previous threads that deal with vasectomies, and I had no luck with my last search.
Oh – before I (we?) go on, I should probably make absolutely clear something I only hinted at in the OP:
I don’t have any kids.
(That’s a little bit unusual for people who undergo the V-word, so I thought I’d better spell it out, just in case.)
And something even more unusual for people who get their vas deferenses (deferensi?) interrupted:
I’m not married, either. Nor have I ever been married, despite being 37 years old. Nor am I even dating anyone at this time. (Nor, given my track record over the past decade, am I in much danger of dating anyone very soon.) And I don’t mean by that that I’m a “swinger”, I mean that no one but myself has been on my bed since early 1997. (And it’s a queen size, too, which I bought precisely because it would be wide enough for two people, dog gone it.)
When I “resume sex”, it will be only with Rosy Palm and her 5 sisters.
tracer, slight hijack if you don’t mind…how much does it cost, roughly, to store your little swimmers in liquid nitrogen for that length of time? Seriously. (I’ve been contemplating having the procedure).
Laughing Lagomorph: The place I went to charged $110 per deposit just to do the freezing. Each deposit resulted in 2-4 vials. Each of my vials carried anywhere from 5 million to 10 million little swimmers in terms of its post-thaw count. YSCMV*. The facility recommended storing 240 million little swmmers to have a good chance of making one baby. For me, that worked out to about 34 vials, which I accumulated over the course of making 14 deposits.
However, these were just the one-time charges for making the deposits in the first place. Their cost for storing the vials was $200 per year for the first dozen vials, plus $100 per year for each additional dozen vials (or fraction thereof). Frozen man-goo has a shelf life of roughly 10 years when stored at 79 degrees Kelvin (liquid nitrogen temperature).
i’ve been thinking about it, i have two children and do not want anymore. how long after the procedure should you go without masturbation? are you given something to stop erections? are you required to shave? any help is much appreciated…
According to one pamphlet thay gave me to read, you’re supposed to be able to resume sexual activity after 4 days. However, according to http://www.vasectomymedical.com/vasectomy-recovery.html, you’re supposed to avoid sex for at least the first full week afterwards. (After this period, you’ll have to masturbate, 'cause that’s the only way they can check to see if your sperm count has dropped to zero.)
Of course, recovery time may depend on whether you have a conventional vasectomy or a no scalpel vasectomy. (I had the former, 'cause that was all Kaiser Permanente offered.)
I wasn’t. Actually, erections are okay to have, as long as they don’t occur during the operation. Fortunately, during the operation, you’ll be so worried about your 'nads that you’re not going to be thinking about sex much.
Most definitely. In fact, it was the shaving that was the most traumatic part for me! I’d never shaved my pubes before, and here I had to shave the surface of my scrotum and underneath my schlong. I used an electric razor to shave and electric “buzz cut” clippers to remove the longer hairs. Word to the wise: Electric razors are pretty mild, but do not get hair or beard clippers anywhere near your scrotum! The skin can catch in the buzz-saw part. I nicked myself twice with the clippers before I wised up and switched to good old-fashioned scissors. And even then, the skin of my scrotum and my penile underside was unexpectedly raw afterward. I remember thinking, “Yikes! If just shaving is this uncomfortable afterward, imagine how awful it’s going to feel after the surgery!” (Fortunately, my fears were ungrounded.)
You can store less, but then to have decent odds of baby-making you’ll have to use a more esoteric procedure like in vitro fertilization.
Yeah, but would you know the correct nutrient and preservative broth to mix with your semen to ensure its survival? And does the refrigeration gear for your liquid N[sub]2[/sub] have a redundant power supply? And who are you going to get to do the impregnation procedure once you take your sperm out of cold storage?
Then again, the outfit I went to was in San Francisco. For all I know, they have to charge more than other sperm storage facilities simply to pay their high rent.
A “Snipped Man” mousepad?! My God, woman, have you gone mad?! Horrors! I’ve been keeping a low profile about this surgery at work, on purpose! I ain’t about to start blurting it out now. I mean, would you run around wearing a T-shirt that proclaims “I’VE HAD A VASECTOMY!”? (Seriously, though, people might look at me funny if they knew I got sterilized without any kids. You just know they’re all gonna say, “But what if you change your mind later?”)
And as for the car-sticker … well … the procedure hasn’t increased my ass-getting quota yet.
I have often considered getting a vasectomy, ever since I was about 17 or so (21 now)… I think I shall get one AFTER I get my carrer in gear so I can store a “reserve batch” just in case I change my mind.
I’ve wanted to be sterile ever since I found out what causes children (My spaying appointment is in May… can’t wait)
Don’t worry, xenothrope, lots of people feel the same way you do. This board is pretty open-minded and you won’t find it the norm to be insulted or attacked here for not wanting children, as long as you don’t be a jerk about it. Try googling the word ‘childfree’ if you want to find some message boards with like-minded people, or feel free to e-mail me for links.
You may be condensing this for the purposes of board brevity, but my urologist was adamant about the post-op instructions. At least three ejaculations a week for six weeks, then a semen analysis, followed by another six weeks, again, with at least three ejaculations, and another semen analysois. After twelve weeks and two consecutive “clear” reports, they told me I could discontinue contraception.
As far as resuming sex, I was given an appointment one week after the procedure so the doctor could advise me if it was safe to resume relations. Perhaps I jumped the gun with my shower escapade, but apparently there were no adverse effects.
When I had mine they shaved the area to be cut and that’s it. They cauterized it (the vas d.) with electricity. About half way through the local wore off while they were working on me. All of a sudden I felt a shock and my lightning fast reflexes came into play. I kicked the doc. (with my knee) He asks “Did you feel that?” I say “I’m sorry for kicking you and yes I felt that.” I think he didn’t believe me because he shocked me again and I kicked him again. I had to go through the injections again. They burn!
You won’t have to worry about erections folks. It was a real shrinker! The nurse holding down my legs was beautiful, I was embarassed. I don’t think I could get any smaller if I was to jump into a giant glass of ice water.
My balls turned black and took quite some time to get anywhere near close to a normal skin color. I was fully able to walk without any soreness within a week.
I’m envious. I’d like to get sterilised, but no doctor wants to do it. I’m too young, you see (27). They won’t do it before age 40 (and then what’s the point, i ask?)
Also, a woman’s body still isn’t her own, it belongs to the “couple”.
When a woman wants to be sterilized, her husband has to give his consent. When a man wants to get the snip, he doesn’t even have to tell his wife.
(IMO only, YMMV, etc)
(My spaying appointment is in May… can’t wait)