They were a nice pair of shorts with lots of nice pockets.
Where could they have gone? I don’t have a roommate, so they weren’t stolen. There’s no way I lost them at the laundry, I am too careful about stuff like that. I’ve checked all my drawers and in my car. Where the hell did my shorts go? 
Move on, I’m afraid your shorts in in the realm of biros, TV remotes, and everything else you need at some point but can never find. They may return one day, they may not. Live in hope.
Were they grey? If so, I threw them out a couple days ago… they had a hole in the crotch.
Sorry.
[rain man]
These are DEFINITELY not my shorts.
[/rain man]
Might they be in a laundry basket? When I do laundry, I’ve been known to miss something in the bottom of the basket, and I don’t find it again until I do laundry again.
Robin
Nope. Went through all my laundry, even looked under the bed and behind the couch. Hmm …
They’re in the same place all of the single missing socks go to.
Either that, or it was stolen by the monsters in your closet. I guess they don’t much like going around naked.
Pull out the bottom drawer of your chest of drawers. They may have fallen behind there, and may have been small enough not to affect the closing of the drawer. It’s happened to me with a few t-shirts, so now it’s the first place I check if I can’t find something in the drawers.
Sure, you looked under the couch, but did you check under the cushions?
It’s simple. You never had such a pair of shorts. It was all a/an hallucination. Seek extensive therapy immediately.
This could become the unexplained case of the Cheshire shorts.
Interestingly, my mother called recently to tell me that she had misplaced a black turtleneck sweater.
I have a different problem with clothes - I know what I have, I just can’t get to most of it. For instance, all of my shorts are in the bottom of a cedar chest in my living room. There’s a small pile of junk on the lid of that chest; if I want to open the chest, I have to find somewhere to put the junk.
They’re wadded up under something else. Clean that pigsty up and you’ll find them toot sweet!
Hmm… what are you wearing now?
Ah ha!!! You have been to my place. Here’s our first clue.
I’ll give you my AOL sn if you want to talk like this.
IF yOu wANt to seE yOUR SHortS AGaiN, pLAce One MILliON DOllARs iN THE trAsH cAn at 8tH & WEstERn
Perhaps the last time you were through wearing them you put them in one of the nice pockets for safe keeping.
No wonder you can’t find them.
Either that, or you’re still wearing them.
[Tweek]
AAAHH, it’s the Underpants Gnomes!
The’re expanding into new territory.
[/Tweek]
Of, I have this problem all the time. I keep having to open spacial rifts into the universe of pant that is created whenever something liken this happens. It’s not as bad as that time I got into the bag that I was carrying, though. That sucked.