Note to Mods – At first glance this might belong in another forum, but I put it in the pit because religious threads tend to end up there, and I swore a bit. Move it if necessary.
I admit to having issues with the Catholic Church. Not Catholic people, mind you, but the church organization itself and many of the beliefs it stuffs down its followers throats. Like any organization, there are truly wonderful folks (like the one I married) and there are complete assholes. What someone chooses to believe is absolutely irrelevant to me. I take issue with things only when they are imposed on me or society in the name of the church.
My issues, trivial as they are: (this is by no means a complete list)
Abortion – This is no ones business but the owner of the uterus. What she chooses to keep in there or not is none of the churches concern.
Patriarchal Domination – Get over it boys, you’re pissing on half the worlds population; the fun half in my opinion – Oh, but you wouldn’t know that would you.
Defense of pedophilic Priests – Maybe, just maybe, if we would let them fuck other consenting adults they might not abuse children.
No Meat on Fridays? – Excuse me, but if there is a heaven, my diet will have exactly NO impact on whether I get to enter or not (cannibalism possibly excepted).
Guilt, Guilt, Guilt – Um… yeah, that is one way to control your minions, But I don’t see Cecil doing it. He’s got Mods instead. Seems to work.
Organized Religion – I generally distrust all Organized religion, and the Catholic Church seems to be more organized than most.
I willfully go watch the nieces & nephews get their baptism and their first communion, and I truly don’t care what superstitions they follow,(though I am not thrilled at this being forced on them) but now Mrs. Bandersnatch wants to participate in some expensive Catholic hypocrisy known as an annulment of her first marriage.
Now her Catholicism is affecting ME. To the tune of $5000. How did they come up with that figure? Did this come from the Priests hail marys vs. our fathers vs. sins vs. frequency vs. severity decoder ring? Do they somehow know that this is the upper limit I will spend on anything I can’t drive or live in?
Knowing almost nothing about the Catholic religion, here is my take on things.
PRIEST: Mrs. Bandersnatch, you know you are not really married to Mr. Bandersnatch don’t you? You are living in sin (go confess it now-guilt, guilt), and when you die you will have to spend eternity in heaven with Mr. Shithead Firsthusband.
MRS. BANDERSNATCH: Oh No! What can I do? (she’s really brighter than this)
PRIEST: Very simple. Give us $5000, and we will pretend your first marriage never existed, but only if Mr. Shithead Firsthusband agrees, then we will put in a good word upstairs and you can spend forever with Mr. Bandersnatch. You will still be living in sin of course, because you did not give money to the church to have a Catholic wedding. Oh, and artificial birth control is practiced in your home (go confess it again now, guilt, guilt), so you won’t be procreating and giving money to the church to support our schools (guilt, guilt)
MRS BANDERSNATCH: …well I don’t know…(I swear she is brighter than this)
PRIEST: You know, your dead father was a devout Catholic, and he would have wanted this (guilt, guilt)
Truth being told, I absolutely cannot and will not say no to this wonderful woman. I will try to dissuade her in any manner I can come up with, but if she insists on going through with this, she will. But this is putting a strain on our marriage. Five grand will not change my life. I would be happy for her to piss away this kind of money in nearly any other way, but I have a real issue giving it to the Catholic Church. One option I have presented to her is that I will agree to any amount when the Priest agrees that I give the same amount to Planned Parenthood, NARAL, or some other organization that is as distasteful to him as his is to me.
If you want to flame me for my opinions; fine, whatever. You won’t change my opinion, and I won’t try to change yours. Save your vitriol for someone who might actually give a shit that you disagree with them.
If however, you wish to enlighten me, share some insight that I am just not seeing, or genuinely fight my ignorance, I welcome your words of wisdom, and I appreciate your advice